Would you quit your job to spare your husband from childcare?
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Anonymous
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Trying to understand this woman’s choice.
She quit her job and dissolved her successful company with 13 employees all because her husband couldn’t handle childcare for a 3-year-old. Did I mention the husband is unemployed? https://www.thelily.com/i-had-to-choose-being-a-mother-with-no-child-care-or-summer-camps-women-are-being-edged-out-of-the-workforce |
Anonymous
| Well that’s...no. |
Anonymous
| It reads like a parody. Lots of women are being put in impossible positions right now. But the owner of a company who CHOSE to shut that company down and lay off others because her husband refused to do any parenting -- that's not societal oppression of women, it's just one really pathetic dude. |
Anonymous
| I’ve seen this posted elsewhere. Traditional gender roles are deeply ingrained in our psyches. |
Anonymous
Yeah, I can't believe they picked this woman as the face of this issue. Why do you think they did? Is it because for once it's NOT a case of "well, she made less money so she should be the one to quit" so the gender imbalance is obvious and directly related to the pandemic rather than connected to wage gaps or something? I'm the higher earner in my household to the point that we couldn't pay our bills on just my husband's income, and sometimes it's frustrating to feel locked into my job, but sometimes I'm also relieved not to have the choice of whether to work or not. |
Anonymous
| Her company was thriving during a pandemic. How hard would it have been for the husband to say ‘hey honey keep bringing in high six-figures, I’ve got this?’ |
Anonymous
| I think it's interesting the husband declined to comment for the story. I wonder if she is setting herself up to avoid large support payments to him in the event of a divorce. |
Anonymous
| I also thought that was a bizarre example and have no idea why it was published. |
Anonymous
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This article was so poorly done. When I read the headline I thought it would be a legit article, instead they chose the poorest example they could find: a woman quitting her job because her husband won't watch the kid, even though he has no job! I also thought it was interesting that he wouldn't comment. My DH, who usually has little care in these types of stories, was like "that guy needs to grow the F up."
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Anonymous
| I would quit my job to spare my children from my husband's childcare. Don't say divorce because my lawyer says it's better to stay together and get 100% custody than get divorced and let him get 50% custody |
Anonymous
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amazing that she felt like he wouldn't care for their child "even if she asked." Why is it on her to ask?? What happens if she gets sick or dies?
He seems to be mid to late 40s, with a 3 year old. He probably never intended to have to care for his child full time. I have a 3 year old, it's hard. But I could and would suck it up if it meant keeping family income coming in. |
Anonymous
+1. |
Anonymous
This is dumb. What does your husband do or not do that he can’t have custody? I have a friend who wouldn’t divorce for this reason but she has not ONCE left her kids alone with her husband. |
Anonymous
Your husband’s childcare might be better. A lot of women who say things like this tend to be the type that: - Allow kids to not sleep (get up anytime they are crying) - Baby kids - control every little thing - Don’t have a life outside of the home You’re most likely not as good of a parent as you think and your husband knows this |
Anonymous
| I see men like this all the time. A lot end up taking a job out of state or country so they have an excuse to not care for their kids. Definitely not an outlier. |