My 12 year old isn’t smart
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Anonymous
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Struggling with a child that is just dumb as a sack of hammers. He also lies a lot and displays like every personality trait to make a perfect addict or inmate.
Please don’t tell me not to write his fate. I’m looking for ways to lessen the inevitable damage. And to decrease the anxiety and aggression in our household. |
Anonymous
| OP here — before you ask — yes we are in therapy, yes he is in therapy, yes he is on meds, yes he has had a neuropsych, no to any sexual abuse (that we know of and we have asked and so has the therapist). |
Anonymous
| Help him find a hobby he likes and direct his energies to that. |
Anonymous
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^^^This.
Seriously. He's lying and acting out because he knows hes struggling. Help him figure out what he's good at and pave the way for him find success doing that, so he has something to balance the failures he experiencing at school. |
Anonymous
| This sounds like FASD. |
Anonymous
| OP here — not sure how it could be. I don’t and didn’t drink before I got pregnant, during the pregnancy or now. We keep a sober house. Too many addicts in my family to make it appealing to me. |
Anonymous
| He has your genetics. You are a miserable person so of course he has issues. |
Anonymous
| Try to teach the value of perseverance and working hard. This advice applies regardless of how smart a kid is. Try not to show the dislike and contempt you seem to feel. |
Anonymous
There’s that DCUM support I know and love. I think more people should accept their kids are exceptional. Our son isn’t smart. And yet he’s entitled. And he’s never wrong. It’s a dangerous combo. |
Anonymous
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Is he into sports at all? If he does not like soccer, what about swimming? If that does not work, what about martial arts? Running? Basketball? Dance?
That would help channel a lot of energy, would help pass time, give confidence boost and improve hormonal imbalance, if any. Embrace that he is special, that he won't have the standard path, do not try to "normalize him" beyond basic social skills. What does he like doing? What is he good at? Limit screen and sugar, I am sure you already do that. |
Anonymous
Yes, My 17 year old is like this, he’s been in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist since he was 6. The doctors all love him though, he can be so charming to them but at home and school he is another person and it doesn’t seem to matter what we say. |
Anonymous
He's 12...apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Fix yourself while you are fixing your kid. |
Anonymous
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On meds for ADHD?
Because that’s an ADHD profile. He needs intensive and subject-matter tutoring to feel more self-assured so he won’t lie as much. Perhaps he also needs accommodations in school (preferential seating, repeated directions, extra time on tests, whatever he needs). |
Anonymous
The Apple doesn't fall far from the tree. If you truly care about your child maybe you should sort out your issues together with a Psychologist and if need be a Psychiatrist. Mental Health is a serious matter. |
Anonymous
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- knock some sense into him - military school
- take his "evil" powers of lying and focus that "creativity" into the arts - theater, writing - give him a more structured environment - boarding school - work on a trade - auto mechanic, handyman |