Is this rude?

[Anonymous]

I’m trying to not sound bitter, but my baby shower was this weekend and neither one of my SIL’s came. One texted me to let me know she would be out of town, the other didn’t respond to the invitation at all but did send a big box of stuff for the baby shortly after the invitations went out from the registry.

I’m a little annoyed that my SIL couldn’t even bother to tell me she wasn’t coming. Thankfully my friends and other family members were there, but the silence irritates me. You never know how much food to prepare if people don’t properly RSVP!

[Anonymous]

yes, you are rude

[Anonymous]

In the grand scheme of things, it's nothing.
However I would be annoyed too, for the reasons you stated.

[Anonymous]

You sound hormonal.

[Anonymous]

Not RSPVing means they aren't coming. I would be more annoyed if they said RSVPed no and came and you didn't have enough food.

Are they local?

[Anonymous]

Don’t blame it on the food. You’re upset they didn’t come. You need to accept these women aren’t going to be what you want them to be. Focus on your new nuclear family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Not RSPVing means they aren't coming. I would be more annoyed if they said RSVPed no and came and you didn't have enough food.

Are they local?

Yes they’re both local. The one who didn’t RSVP did send a gift but didn’t say anything to me about the shower, at all. The other said she couldn’t come but didn’t send anything for the baby.

I guess it’s just sad to me because these women are all DD will have for aunts in her life once she’s born and neither one has shown interest at all. I just feel it’s rude to not even acknowledge the shower.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Not RSPVing means they aren't coming. I would be more annoyed if they said RSVPed no and came and you didn't have enough food.

Are they local?

Yes they’re both local. The one who didn’t RSVP did send a gift but didn’t say anything to me about the shower, at all. The other said she couldn’t come but didn’t send anything for the baby.

I guess it’s just sad to me because these women are all DD will have for aunts in her life once she’s born and neither one has shown interest at all. I just feel it’s rude to not even acknowledge the shower.

Honey, get over it. She will be fine. I have five aunts and they’ve all been nonexistent in my life. I’m fine. My DD doesn’t even have any aunts. She I’ll be fine.

YOU are upset. YOU need to accept this. You want forced and fabricated love from disinterested women for your daughter? You need to ask yourself why.

[Anonymous]

My SILs skip all my kids stuff but expect me to show up to all their kids stuff. My MIL also expects me to show up. I just suck it up and go. What can you do? Just keep the peace and be the bigger person.

[Anonymous]

I recently threw a shower for a close friend. Her sisters and SILs were the only ones of all the guests to not RSVP (there were 4 of them). I had to contact the bride because I didn't have email addresses for them (just mailing addresses). It was embarrassing for the bride. I'm not sure why sisters seem to think they don't have to RSVP. All were attending btw.

[Anonymous]

An invitation is not a demand for someone to show up regardless of whatever else is happening in their life on that day or during that time.

Sure, it was not right for her to not RSVP, but at least she sent a gift - isn't that what the shower was for?

[Anonymous]

How old are your SILs?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:How old are your SILs?

One is in her early 40’s, the other is 32.

[Anonymous]

We’re you close with your SILs before this? While the baby really is the theme, the shower ultimately is about the mom-to-be. Your SILs may love their niece/nephew to pieces when he/she arrives, but that doesn’t mean your current pregnancy will create a closer relationship between you and them.

[Anonymous]

They don’t like you obviously.