How comfortable do you feel around in-laws? Scale of 1-10

[Anonymous]

On a scale of 1-10, 1 being complete strangers and 10 being best friends, how comfortable are you around you in-laws? Does this impact your children? If your comfort is low, do your in-laws have a different relationship with your children than they have with say your SIL's kids or perhaps another family member's kids that feels more comfortable with them?

[Anonymous]

My score is about -5. My in-laws aren't just 'strangers', I hate their guts, and have good reasons to. We don't speak.

[Anonymous]

Why is there no option for a negative number?

I feel about as comfortable with my in-laws as I feel during a job interview.

[Anonymous]

I would say a 5. I can't help it but I don't feel comfortable around them at all. They take things I say the wrong way. Everything is pleasant, but we never talk about anything other than the weather pretty much.

No impact on kids. We still visit often. Mine are the only grandkids. What does have an impact is that they don't visit us. My parents visit us often and have a much different relationship with my kids because of that. Weirdly enough, we never visit my parents. ILs probably get 15 visits to every visit my parents get.

[Anonymous]

9. Not best friends at all, but perfectly comfortable as family.

[Anonymous]

My step MIL who passed away- 10, she was amazing

My real MIL and FIL - 0. I have to walk on egg shells when I am around them

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Why is there no option for a negative number?

I feel about as comfortable with my in-laws as I feel during a job interview.

Lol! A bad job interview.

[Anonymous]

I'm in the minority here but I like my in-laws better than my own family and after 18 years, I consider them my family. They are wonderful people and have treated me like one of their kids from very early on.

[Anonymous]

By the second kid I started breastfeeding in front of MIL (FIL is deceased) so what's that, like an 8?

[Anonymous]

4
We are too different. I don’t hate them at all. We just don’t like the same things, have the same tastes, beliefs, lifestyles. That makes things difficult and we usually don’t spend much time subjecting ourselves to that but I have no issue in putting up with rare snide remarks or bad food so my kids can spend time with them.

[Anonymous]

9 with my MIL (FIL passed away). Not best friends but...
-wear PJs in front of other and lounge on sofa together
-debate like family/say anything, and then all is well afterward
-have great conversations
-share dreams

[Anonymous]

6. I bite my tongue a lot around them, but we usually have a good time together.

[Anonymous]

MIL is passed away now, but for the 15 years she was around, probably a 3 out of 10. Pretty uncomfortable around her, didn't know anything about her, didn't have anything to say to her, and she felt the same about me. I tried to create a relationship for the first few years, but she was tough. I gave up caring after a few years - it was easier that way. We only spend an afternoon with the inlaws every year.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm in the minority here but I like my in-laws better than my own family and after 18 years, I consider them my family. They are wonderful people and have treated me like one of their kids from very early on.

I could have written this! I love my in-laws and my kids have a great relationship with them. I do think it matters. Another DIL does not have a good relationship with our in-laws and her children are not as close to the grandparents as mine are.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'm in the minority here but I like my in-laws better than my own family and after 18 years, I consider them my family. They are wonderful people and have treated me like one of their kids from very early on.

I could have written this! I love my in-laws and my kids have a great relationship with them. I do think it matters. Another DIL does not have a good relationship with our in-laws and her children are not as close to the grandparents as mine are.

second pp again... I started dating my husband when we were in college and so "joined" the family when I was still young enough to be "mothered" by my now MIL. I always have always felt like this made it easier for me to be part of the family.