Violated no contact agreement via group political text. Next step?

[Anonymous]

My young adult DD was assaulted about two years ago by a client of her former employer. No charges were filed though there is a hospital report. However, it came out that he’d done to other women and my DD left the company as a result. Part of her settlement with them was that they would get the man to agree to no contact with her. For two years, they only crossed paths once and he left the venue. Then, twice this week, he included her in group texts on a political issue related to sexual violence. DD blocked him once she realized who it was. She feels he may be taunting her, but is sure he’ll say that he just sent the message out to his entire address book. Very concerning that he still has her number. She wants her stepdad to contact him to insist that he delete her contact info. She’s pretty sure that her former employer won’t be if any help. She’s had the same cell phone number since she was 14 and doesn’t want to change it. Not sure what other option we would have beyond consulting the police.

[Anonymous]

It sounds like this guy also left the former employee, so there is no recourse with the former employer. She can either change the number that she is using, or decide to finally file,proper charges against the guy. Don’t have stepdad or anyone else contact him directly. The response is what he wants.

[Anonymous]

If I were in her shoes, I'd still change the number.

[Anonymous]

Is there anything the police could do? He’s not court ordered to leave her alone, just a private agreement between citizen and business?

Unfortunately for your DD and any other person who needs to be physically separated from an assailant, it’s really her responsibility to stay safe. People have to move towns and careers over this kind of thing. I think changing her number and documenting this incident is your only go to. That way if it happens again, maybe you can pursue a legal restraining order.

[Anonymous]

Most legal protective orders last 2 years. Depending on the state and what happened, the police could investigate and prosecute the original crime. Even if they don’t end up filing charges they’ll go ask him questions about it and likely tell him to leave her alone. That’s if the conduct wound have been a felony.

[Anonymous]

Can't she just block the number? Isn't that the same thing as having him delete her contact info? Was there any legal no contact order in place?

[Anonymous]

So it was the employer that was supposed to make him adhere to no contact? Was that explicitly in writing in any legally enforceable document and did such a document specify any consequences for him? I can't see how--because he wasn't even the employer's own employee but a client. I fear your DD was given horrible advice by the employer, to protect the employer and its business relationship with the client--not to protect her.

She should talk to police immediately and also consult a lawyer. If the statute of limitations has not run out she might be able to file a police report on the assault, but I doubt police can enforce a no contact agreement written only by some corporate law or HR department.

She also should keep every contact he makes so she has a trail as evidence if he ramps things up and keeps contacting her, even via group communications.

Stepdad should not contact him, first because she needs to deal herself, and also because if the guy sees anything stepdad says as a threat, the guy could try to upset her further by going after stepdad.

OP, she truly may need to change her number or she'll never feel comfortable. If she is on other social media, she needs to use the strongest privacy settings. Has she had any life events lately that she's peen posting or tweeting about that would have attracted his attention? Or does he seem to be using the current public discussion of sexual assault as a reason to needle her? I'd the nature of his group communications along lines of "women are liars about this stuff" etc.?

[Anonymous]

I would consult a lawyer and see if she could file charges now, if that’s what she wants.

[Anonymous]

Can she block his number?

[Anonymous]

One thing to keep in mind is that at this point, he has no idea if she changed her number, right? He doesn't knwo if she even got the message. I'm assuming there are no current mututal contacts who would confirm her current number for him.

If she does anything, he has the satisfaction/charge of knowing he made contact. If she can bloack him and he doesn't get an alert from the block, that might be the least stimulating response. He wouldn't be able to tell the difference from her having changed that number years ago, anyway.

[Anonymous]

(sorry for typos)

[Anonymous]

Just block his number.

[Anonymous]

This is petty.

[Anonymous]

Have a lawyer send a letter ordering him not to contact her, per their no contact agreement.

She should also block his number so he can't reach her. I don't see why she has to change her number.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This is petty.

NP. Are you saying that being asaulted to the point of being admitted to a hospital is petty?