Do normal parents check college child's grades...?

[Anonymous]

i) you have login/password to their U portal?
ii) you ask them to pull them up on the portal when they're home for a break?
iii) print out / screenshot email?
iv) you just take their word for it?
v) you don't care, don't ask, don't tell?

My oldest just went to college and not sure what is normal. Also, if you're involved with monitoring their grades, do you pay attention to assignments (e.g. practice sets) and midterms too...or just final grades that show up on the transcript?

[Anonymous]

I have two out of college and two in college now. I have never even considered checking their grades. I couldn't tell you exactly what classes they are currently taking. They are adults.

[Anonymous]

We ask our kid how he is doing when he comes home for break. He can tell us his grades if he wants to. We don’t press. He has never given us any reason to worry about him so why hover?

[Anonymous]

I want to know what classes they are enrolled in and the final term grades. I want to know they are on track to graduate in 4 years.

That’s it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:i) you have login/password to their U portal?
ii) you ask them to pull them up on the portal when they're home for a break?
iii) print out / screenshot email?
iv) you just take their word for it?
v) you don't care, don't ask, don't tell?

My oldest just went to college and not sure what is normal. Also, if you're involved with monitoring their grades, do you pay attention to assignments (e.g. practice sets) and midterms too...or just final grades that show up on the transcript?

By college they are supposed to be able to manage this themselves, so IMO less is more. However, it really depends on the kid. My oldest had a pretty bad case of senioritis, so he knows he didn't earn complete independence of communication yet. We have an agreement that we will check grades together 1 month in, after mid-terms, and just before finals 1st term freshman year. I have access, but I don't plan to look until he discusses it with me. Depending on how things are going, that will scale back to just relying on periodic self-reporting. He has to meet minimum targets in order to keep getting funding, but really I don't care about details. 2nd kid will be different. I already don't need to check on anything in HS, so I expect he'll be off to college and if I'm lucky I'll find out his GPA at graduation.

[Anonymous]

DS sends me a screenshot of his grades each semester. I don’t ask for them,but he says I give him tuition he gives me good grades.

[Anonymous]

We ask for grades at the end of the semester but logging into portals, asking for grades on assignments, etc. is so crazy and over the top.

[Anonymous]

I knew a smart boy in college who failed out and didn't tell his parents. He remained on campus (well, in the college's town) for at least a year, on their dime obviously, before they found out. I never understood how they didn't find out immediately, but guess it makes sense if so many parents never check grades/enrollment.

What if grades are awful? Why would you keep paying for their college if they're failing, getting Ws, and/or half-assing with 2.0s?

[Anonymous]

both my kids have merit scholarships that require them to maintain a certain GPA. as long as that GPA is met (3.0 for older DD and 3.5 for younger)...I don't care that much.

[Anonymous]

No, this is way too much, especially if you're considering tracking individual assignments and logging into your kid's portal! If you're paying for their college, I do think that gives you the right to ask about final grades though.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I want to know what classes they are enrolled in and the final term grades. I want to know they are on track to graduate in 4 years.

That’s it.

You make them try to explain all that to you...why not just get login to the portal where it lays out the grades and their graduation track in detail?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No, this is way too much, especially if you're considering tracking individual assignments and logging into your kid's portal! If you're paying for their college, I do think that gives you the right to ask about final grades though.

Well, if they're not doing the practice sets you can be pretty damn sure they're going to bomb midterms. Wouldn't you rather address that NOW before they fail a few courses first semester? Or if they're getting crummy p-set scores in math or stats, you could encourage a tutor.

[Anonymous]

Didn’t have access for either kid. One kid shared grades for every class (which we never asked for). High achieving and got mostly As and a high GPA. Other kid we were just relieved he graduated - whether it was an A, B or C didn’t matter as long as it was passing.

[Anonymous]

We will be in this position next year.

We're paying, I want to see the grades. I won't login though. I rarely do for high school. He's on the honor roll and values that... I'm not worried.

I can't imagine checking each assignment's grade in College.

[Anonymous]

Never. Both kids tell me their grades at the end of the semester but I have never needed to check. They do well. It sounds extreme to login to their grades and track them unless they have given you a reason to think they are failing.