Would you mind if your 15 year old drank?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

Again, you made that up. The data does not support it.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.



The problem is that you’re surrounded with worst case scenario so you really actually don’t understand what happens to the majority of kids.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.



The problem is that you’re surrounded with worst case scenario so you really actually don’t understand what happens to the majority of kids.

NP. I don't think you understand how research works...
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:15? Yes, absolutely.


+1. I am from a country where drinking is allowed at 16 and I think 2 beers at 15 alone at a party is too much. A sip or 1/2 glass at a family gathering, may be, but not alone at a party.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.


Yes, parents who have open and honest communication with their kids NEVER get lied to, and their kids NEVER make bad decisions. That's definitely how life works.

How do I know it is, indeed, realistic to raise a kid who literally never drinks in high school? I am one. My siblings didn't, either. I have a group of friends in high school who made good choices and stayed on a good path. I also had friends who did drink, with no real consequences; great for them. I also had friends who drank, with disastrous consequences.

Best of luck! Good luck. It may well be that your kids will drink in high school with no real consequences. Then again, they may be the ones who get the DUI, lose the scholarship, end up on drugs. Time will tell. Because YOU can't tell.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.


Yes, parents who have open and honest communication with their kids NEVER get lied to, and their kids NEVER make bad decisions. That's definitely how life works.

How do I know it is, indeed, realistic to raise a kid who literally never drinks in high school? I am one. My siblings didn't, either. I have a group of friends in high school who made good choices and stayed on a good path. I also had friends who did drink, with no real consequences; great for them. I also had friends who drank, with disastrous consequences.

Best of luck! Good luck. It may well be that your kids will drink in high school with no real consequences. Then again, they may be the ones who get the DUI, lose the scholarship, end up on drugs. Time will tell. Because YOU can't tell.


Actually I can tell because my kids are 28 and 30 now. But yeah go ahead keep wishing bad things to happen to the kids in your children’s high school that are experimenting with alcohol see how that works for you. #Karma

It’s so funny to me that you think It’s unrealistic to raise a kid that doesn’t lie to their parents that’s actually funny.

You know how I know it’s realistic to raise a team that doesn’t lie to their parents? Because I am one!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.



The problem is that you’re surrounded with worst case scenario so you really actually don’t understand what happens to the majority of kids.

NP. I don't think you understand how research works...


How about you read a little bit about the research done around cops, firefighters, and therapists and how I was being around tragedy affects their ability to reason.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.


Yes, parents who have open and honest communication with their kids NEVER get lied to, and their kids NEVER make bad decisions. That's definitely how life works.

How do I know it is, indeed, realistic to raise a kid who literally never drinks in high school? I am one. My siblings didn't, either. I have a group of friends in high school who made good choices and stayed on a good path. I also had friends who did drink, with no real consequences; great for them. I also had friends who drank, with disastrous consequences.

Best of luck! Good luck. It may well be that your kids will drink in high school with no real consequences. Then again, they may be the ones who get the DUI, lose the scholarship, end up on drugs. Time will tell. Because YOU can't tell.


Actually I can tell because my kids are 28 and 30 now. But yeah go ahead keep wishing bad things to happen to the kids in your children’s high school that are experimenting with alcohol see how that works for you. #Karma

It’s so funny to me that you think It’s unrealistic to raise a kid that doesn’t lie to their parents that’s actually funny.

You know how I know it’s realistic to raise a team that doesn’t lie to their parents? Because I am one!


It's not that your kids never lied to you. It's that you don't know what the lies were or when, dumb bunny.

Now trot off to Menopause n Dementia where you belong.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.


Yes, parents who have open and honest communication with their kids NEVER get lied to, and their kids NEVER make bad decisions. That's definitely how life works.

How do I know it is, indeed, realistic to raise a kid who literally never drinks in high school? I am one. My siblings didn't, either. I have a group of friends in high school who made good choices and stayed on a good path. I also had friends who did drink, with no real consequences; great for them. I also had friends who drank, with disastrous consequences.

Best of luck! Good luck. It may well be that your kids will drink in high school with no real consequences. Then again, they may be the ones who get the DUI, lose the scholarship, end up on drugs. Time will tell. Because YOU can't tell.


Actually I can tell because my kids are 28 and 30 now. But yeah go ahead keep wishing bad things to happen to the kids in your children’s high school that are experimenting with alcohol see how that works for you. #Karma

It’s so funny to me that you think It’s unrealistic to raise a kid that doesn’t lie to their parents that’s actually funny.

You know how I know it’s realistic to raise a team that doesn’t lie to their parents? Because I am one!


It's not that your kids never lied to you. It's that you don't know what the lies were or when, dumb bunny.

Now trot off to Menopause n Dementia where you belong.


Oh your kids are definitely going to want to drink.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.



The problem is that you’re surrounded with worst case scenario so you really actually don’t understand what happens to the majority of kids.

NP. I don't think you understand how research works...


How about you read a little bit about the research done around cops, firefighters, and therapists and how I was being around tragedy affects their ability to reason.


Addiction researcher here: you’re talking about trauma research. I know something about that, too, and it’s absolutely a risk factor for later development of addiction (and a whole host of other things). Your comment is a non sequiter, but I wanted to address the link between trauma and addiction.

As to the worst case scenario thing: I know how to interpret epidemiological and longitudinal studies. I’ve also treated patients with addiction, and know how to separate my clinical work from the research. Sure, the majority of kids who drink in adolescence don’t go on to develop alcohol addiction. That doesn’t mean it’s good for them or okay to do or NBD. I’ll try to modify those risk factors I can, thanks.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


You want me to parent your kids no thanks. How about you have open and honest communication with your kids instead of punitive and unrealistic expectations. If you were actually parenting your kid you would know if they were drinking not me.


Yes, parents who have open and honest communication with their kids NEVER get lied to, and their kids NEVER make bad decisions. That's definitely how life works.

How do I know it is, indeed, realistic to raise a kid who literally never drinks in high school? I am one. My siblings didn't, either. I have a group of friends in high school who made good choices and stayed on a good path. I also had friends who did drink, with no real consequences; great for them. I also had friends who drank, with disastrous consequences.

Best of luck! Good luck. It may well be that your kids will drink in high school with no real consequences. Then again, they may be the ones who get the DUI, lose the scholarship, end up on drugs. Time will tell. Because YOU can't tell.


Actually I can tell because my kids are 28 and 30 now. But yeah go ahead keep wishing bad things to happen to the kids in your children’s high school that are experimenting with alcohol see how that works for you. #Karma

It’s so funny to me that you think It’s unrealistic to raise a kid that doesn’t lie to their parents that’s actually funny.

You know how I know it’s realistic to raise a team that doesn’t lie to their parents? Because I am one!


It's not that your kids never lied to you. It's that you don't know what the lies were or when, dumb bunny.

Now trot off to Menopause n Dementia where you belong.


Oh your kids are definitely going to want to drink.


Sorry, was that a little too close to home?
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Anonymous wrote:It is so scary to me that there are parents out here who even think this is a question. SMH.


I'll bite-- why is it so scary to you. Do you think everyone who has a beer at 15 end up with unhealthy approach to alcohol? Or that everyone who has a beer at 15 suffer lifelong health consequences?


Is it or is it not OK to break the law, moron? Oh it is? Oh but just THIS law?

Hope your kids enjoy jail, suspension, losing a job, and all the other natural, predictable consequences of breaking the law and the rules of schools and businesses.


I appreciate the thoughtful responses but I think this is hysterical.


Tell it to the judge when your 17- or 18-year-old gets a DUI.

We had a lot of parents like you when I was on the swim team. My parents were the "uncool" ones. Here are actual things that happened to some of my teammmates:

1) One did, in fact, get a DUI when she was a freshman at Michigan State, age 19. Lost a swimming scholarship.
2) One lost the team captain position when my coach heard she drank at a party. A high school consequence, sure. Low-stakes, sure. But a natural consequence of her dumb behavior.
3) One started abusing drugs while in high school and went down the full, predictable druggie path. Two babies with two different dads; she has never had custody, her parents raise them. She's been in and out of jail. Never held down a decent job. Rehab, lose a job at Pizza Hut or some such, rinse, repeat.
4) My friend got in too deep with some of the guys on the boys team and kind of became...known as a slut. She has a fine life now, but that can't be fun to look back on.

There were other teammates who drank and got away with it and no big consequences, sure. Maybe your kids will be like those kids, fine. Maybe not.


You must be a child of an alcoholic because you’re completely hysterical


Every single one of those things actually happened to people I was on the swim team with in high school.

And as I mentioned, yes, of course there were some kids who drank and there were no real consequences. But sure, go down the path of losing scholarships, DUIs and drug abuse and good luck.

Because you don't get to act like you can predict what will happen for YOUR kid. You don't get to declare that you will have a no-consequence kid vs. a kid who gets a DUI.

Best of luck!


Thanks for warning us, PP. I’m definitely not going to let my kids swim.


Best of luck! Gooooooood luck! Think of me when the entirely predictable consequence comes, PP. Think of me.


It’s a gateway. You think it will just be swim. But then they start diving. Or playing water polo.


Best of luck! Good luck. I will try to hide my smug smile when I hear about the latest round of dumb-ass behavior and predictable consequences from your set. I'll pretend to nod with concern and cluck sympathetically.


That would be just as pathetic as I acting smugly when I know your kid is guzzling beer and you think he’s perfect.


If you catch my kid drinking beer, let me know. I'll be on it and I will handle it. It's called parenting. Maybe try it some time?


Please do the same if you see mine at the pool.
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Anonymous wrote:Yes, I would absolutely mind!
College is the earliest kids should try alcohol (responsibly, although it might be wishful thinking).


Not trying until college reduces the likelihood your kid will try responsibly then.


You made that up.


Kids who have never had alcohol, particularly if it is because of parent restrictions, are more likely to go crazy with the freedom of college. They are also less prepared to handle the effects of alcohol so are more likely to get trashed, intentionally or not.

NP, and you have literally no research to back that up.

As someone who studies alcohol addiction, you’re damn right I would mind if my 15 year old drank. I’m not so naive as to think teenagers never drink, but I’m not going to approve it or supply for them or tell them it’s okay. Same for weed. Both substances are terrible for developing brains.



The problem is that you’re surrounded with worst case scenario so you really actually don’t understand what happens to the majority of kids.

NP. I don't think you understand how research works...


How about you read a little bit about the research done around cops, firefighters, and therapists and how I was being around tragedy affects their ability to reason.


Addiction researcher here: you’re talking about trauma research. I know something about that, too, and it’s absolutely a risk factor for later development of addiction (and a whole host of other things). Your comment is a non sequiter, but I wanted to address the link between trauma and addiction.

As to the worst case scenario thing: I know how to interpret epidemiological and longitudinal studies. I’ve also treated patients with addiction, and know how to separate my clinical work from the research. Sure, the majority of kids who drink in adolescence don’t go on to develop alcohol addiction. That doesn’t mean it’s good for them or okay to do or NBD. I’ll try to modify those risk factors I can, thanks.


I'm talking abut secondary trauma, like you seem to have. You see people with trauma and addiction regularly and you catastrophize the whole world. You should talk to your therapist about it.
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