How common is it for lawyers to have affairs with paralegals?

[Anonymous]

If I see “attorney” I do not select that person for a date.

[Anonymous]

My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If I see “attorney” I do not select that person for a date.

THIS!!!! This is the way!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

Oh, well ...yuck. She most have been gross. I mean ... ewwwww ... a paralegal. So low compared to a wife.

Lol. Ok. Can't imagine why your DH wanted someone else... doesn't sound like he was at all delusional.

[Anonymous]

Lawyer here. I've literally never seen this.

But I have seen many office affairs between lawyers. Very common. I even know two couples, who are now married, who met at work while married to other people. Well, with one couple the DH lawyer was married to someone else and carrying on with a divorced lawyer in our office and ended up divorced over it and is now married to the AP. The other couple, also now married, were both married to other people when they started up with each other.

Not sure why the SAHMommies are paranoid about the paralegals and assistants; it's always the other lawyers.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

Oh, well ...yuck. She most have been gross. I mean ... ewwwww ... a paralegal. So low compared to a wife.

Lol. Ok. Can't imagine why your DH wanted someone else... doesn't sound like he was at all delusional.

Um, so he wanted me back. And said it was stupid. So yeah, when he admits he was wrong, it came from the horses mouth… not mine.

[Anonymous]

I was a paralegal, and I wasn't into this, but I definitely had friends who had sex with attorneys at the firm. I did have a lawyer ask me out who was my dad's age but that did not appeal to me.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

Oh, well ...yuck. She most have been gross. I mean ... ewwwww ... a paralegal. So low compared to a wife.

Lol. Ok. Can't imagine why your DH wanted someone else... doesn't sound like he was at all delusional.

Different poster- you’re an ass
Any person who knowingly cheats, has an affair and breaks up a family IS Trash, low class, immoral, ugly soul.
Adultery is a horrible sin that used to be punished by death. Do not victim blame

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

Oh, well ...yuck. She most have been gross. I mean ... ewwwww ... a paralegal. So low compared to a wife.

Lol. Ok. Can't imagine why your DH wanted someone else... doesn't sound like he was at all delusional.

Different poster- you’re an ass
Any person who knowingly cheats, has an affair and breaks up a family IS Trash, low class, immoral, ugly soul.
Adultery is a horrible sin that used to be punished by death. Do not victim blame

Thank you!

[Anonymous]

Yes, this happened, happens, and will happen.

[Anonymous]

As common as a Dr having an affair with his Nurse. Seriously, How in the heck are we supposed to know? It might happen every day, we just don’t hear about it. 🤦‍♂️

[Anonymous]

Lawyers are a hierarchical group and are, frankly, classist. The lawyers work together, dine together, travel together, drink together, golf together, etc. The paralegals typically aren’t invited unless it’s necessitated by work. Lawyer with lawyer affairs aren’t uncommon. Lawyer affairs with paralegals rarely occur.

-Lawyer

[Anonymous]

It happens, but not as frequently as it used to. HR rules have really tightened the noose on shenanigans. Especially in direct report situations. Honestly, what I hear more about at firms is junior associate with older associate or junior associate with partner "fling". I think there is a perception of vulnerability that is more pronounced with "staff" than there is with attorneys.

[Anonymous]

I am at big law but was at small boutique firm in not that large town before and I had a couple of flings with my paralegals. One of them was interested in doing it and was very sultry at work. she was also a pleaser and really wanted a man around to feel good so she would be like that anywhere else too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My ex-husband did this and admitted to me after the divorce was finalized. He was at a well-known boutique IP law firm.

She was younger, but looked old, and had 50-60 pounds on me…and not in the same social class at all.

He was an insecure man who used his power dynamic to have “sexual transactions”. He said he didn’t know who he was and eventually broke it off.

Absolutely destroyed his life over being delusional… so yes, it happens. Cut your loses on someone like that though. They are dumber than a box of rocks and shouldn’t be practicing law.

Oh, well ...yuck. She most have been gross. I mean ... ewwwww ... a paralegal. So low compared to a wife.

Lol. Ok. Can't imagine why your DH wanted someone else... doesn't sound like he was at all delusional.

Different poster- you’re an ass
Any person who knowingly cheats, has an affair and breaks up a family IS Trash, low class, immoral, ugly soul.
Adultery is a horrible sin that used to be punished by death. Do not victim blame

You completely missed the point.