Forum Index
»
Private & Independent Schools
School Clothes for the Fall
![[Post New]](/jforum/templates/default/images/icon_minipost_new.gif){kind=icon}
Anonymous
If you have to ask, my dear, than you can't afford them. Bespoke only. |
Anonymous
| I think the response comparing the school dress culture to Corporate America's dress culture is the most useful of all. |
Anonymous
|
I'll admit, it's been ages since I spent time in Corporate America, but I didn't notice men checking out each others' shoes. Nor has DH come home depressed because the other lawyers won't play with him and it's all because of his dorky shoes.
Perhaps I've just been unobservant. If so, thank heaven for small mercies. |
Anonymous
nope - This one is: "It's way beyond caving. It's seeking out environments with screwed-up values and then impressing upon your child his/her need to fit in." And it's not my post. |
Anonymous
| Wooooooeeeeeeeeeeeeee. Some people are riding horses with the longest legs in recorded history. |
Anonymous
|
I agree, people are riding some pretty high horses here....
I just hope your kids won't pay the price for your high principles. Even if clothes don't matter to you and your kid (and are you so sure that clothes don't matter to your kid?), they probably matter to the other kids in the class. And this will affect your own kid's social success, like it or not. I'm not saying cave completely and dress them in Brooks Brothers or gansta threads. But don't pretend it doesn't matter at all. On a lighter note, has anybody seen the movie "About a Boy" where the hippie mom sends her kid to school in funky knitted hats with ear flaps, and he has zero friends? |
Anonymous
| My first memory of who was wearing what from where is from 4th grade, and I went to a middle class public school. I'm going to guess that the kids at top DC privates might be a little savvier and be on to it in 3rd grade, but who knows. If I were the OP, I'd get basics from the store you can afford (like black pants etc) and spend a little more on things that people will notice, like the coat, pair of jeans, sneakers, and a few tops/sweaters from recognizable brands or stores. Good luck to you. |
Anonymous
| I agree with the PP. Get the plain items from cheap stores and sprinkle in a few good brands for matching. |
Anonymous
What would be considered a good brand for this age group? I have a feeling that DD has outgrown the Hannah Andersson look. |
Anonymous
I guess that the economy depends on a critical mass of people thinking like this, but it's mind-blowing to watch how the response to the claim that your kid won't need to wear expensive brands of clothing to make friends at a "big three" school is, essentially, that parents who believe that and act on their belief are somehow putting their children at risk. And the "balanced" point of view is that not ALL clothing needs to have a designer label -- just a few crucial pieces. I don't know what is meant by "social success" (is that getting into the right country club?), but get real -- most of us are old enough to know that our lack of interest in conspicuous consumption hasn't kept us from having good friends, good jobs, happy families, and, yes, even smart, happy, well-socialized kids in chi-chi private schools. I've got no problem with people who take pleasure in clothes, but the whole the keeping up with the Joneses phenomenon and the fear of ostracism if you don't wear the right brands and the idea that people are deliberately/self-righteously passing this on to their kids strikes me as profoundly sad. YMMV. Obviously does in some cases. |
Anonymous
| My mother told me a very funny story that relates to this discussion -- one of her friend's daughters was a new student at a school that required uniforms. Soon after she started, her mother asked her who her friends were at the new school. The daughter replied that she couldn't tell yet, because everyone was wearing the same thing. Yikes! |
Anonymous
|
It appears that many posters are assuming extreme views of both sides of the coin without really understanding what many pp's are trying to say. Maybe allowing their own bias to color what is really being expressed?
I am seeing a clear statement by many that while we would all prefer to not have clothing as a factor, we still need to consider its potential influence as it pertains to specific schools, specific children and specific families. One size does not fit all. Seeing the world through high-minded principles is admirable. Seeing it as it actually is, is smarter. |
Anonymous
This age can be tricky. There is a subtle desire to look a bit sloppy (?). The Gap seems to be the right place to start. |
Anonymous
Yes, but it doesn't follow that unprincipled stances are necessarily more realistic than principled ones. The suggestion is kids will be social outcasts at Big 3 schools unless their wardrobes are sprinkled with acceptable labels and/or unless they wear the same kind of shoes as the other kids. The reality is this isn't true. We've already heard -- both from people who believe and people who don't believe in the importance of labels -- that fashion doesn't appear to be a make-or-break issue at Sidwell or GDS. NCS and St. Albans have uniforms, so you'd have to believe that intolerance on those campuses goes so far as to ostracize kids based on things like choice of socks. And if you do believe that, you should be running like a bat out of hell in the opposite direction from those schools rather than inquiring about which socks are the right socks. |
Anonymous
|
The pp is making quite a few extreme assumptions that simply haven't been stated here. Taking statements made by others and then drawing extreme examples is just absurd and detracts from the purpose of this thread.
No parent here is overly fixated on the "right clothing." Rather, there is an acknowedgement that kids use clothing as a tool for acceptance and how do we keep our children from experiencing too much grief while balancing family beliefs? Please don't let your own personal stance or anger cloud the real issue - and that is, how do we balance our beliefs with helping our children assimilate well into a school? Since when is trying to help a child lead a happy, balanced school experience become an "unprincipled stance"? |