My STBX inherited money in 2004, invested it, and is claiming it is all his

[Anonymous]

Wow OP. Just wow. This cannot be real. I need you to be a troll because there is no way you cheated and think this is reasonable.

[Anonymous]

Can we have your DH's contact info? I've got some single friends.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:He is right. It is his. Sounds like he was pretty deliberate and smart about knowing this and never used the money jointly. It's not yours and frankly I think it's selfish of people to believe that HIS inheritance from
HIS family belongs to you.

Yep. Sorry, lady.

If he kept it in a separate account, without your name on it, which it sounds like he was smart enough to do, he played you like a fiddle.

Agree. And his lawyer is right.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP here. We had a discussion last night. He said -- unilaterally -- that I either accept is offer, or I will get the minimum I am entitled to by law. He is angry with me because of some things I did (I needed passion in my life).

What he said is, if I chose to fight, he will bring up my infidelity. His lawyer told him that could eliminate the alimony.

He also made it clear: if I do take the deal, I need to stay in the house for 3 1/2 years, until our child finishes HS. After that, I am free to move.

He showed me details of how he got from then to now with the money: He deposited the inheritance in account, used that to buy 2671 shares of apple on Feb, 2004.

He sold it about a year ago. He sold in 2015 for 131.21. He paid almost 1 million in tax from the proceeds.

I guess I screwed up.

Okay, I call troll. If you are real- yea, you screwed up. If you wanted passion you could have withdrawn a few thousand $$ and had sex with your husband on it while yelling "we're rich, we're rich!"

[Anonymous]

I want to say your STBX was a jerk for intentionally investing money in such a way as to prevent you from accessing it. My DH and I both anticipate (anticipate, do not expect) inheriting money from our families. We've talked about what we would do it with it and it's stuff like paying off our mortgage, retirement investments, getting our two children through college without them having to take on debt, and our dream vacation for a 20th anniversary trip. If either of us wanted to horde that money away from the other, I'd be concerned about the health of our marriage.

Seems like, in your case, that would be a pretty valid concern. If I cheated on DH because I needed 'passion,' I'd be ashamed to ask him for anything beyond child support.

[Anonymous]

OP I am sorry. My DH did the same ( not with apple). Yes here in VA it's all his.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I want to say your STBX was a jerk for intentionally investing money in such a way as to prevent you from accessing it. My DH and I both anticipate (anticipate, do not expect) inheriting money from our families. We've talked about what we would do it with it and it's stuff like paying off our mortgage, retirement investments, getting our two children through college without them having to take on debt, and our dream vacation for a 20th anniversary trip. If either of us wanted to horde that money away from the other, I'd be concerned about the health of our marriage.

Seems like, in your case, that would be a pretty valid concern. If I cheated on DH because I needed 'passion,' I'd be ashamed to ask him for anything beyond child support.

It might be different with two of you inheriting and working. In this case Wife didn't contribute and it doesn't sound as though she plans on getting an inheritance as she is trying to nickel and dime him.

I have a trust fund, and because I planned on co-mingling the annual distributions I get, have a pre nup. I'm happy to share the large annual amount we get, but no, I don't want my spouse getting the money that is and was mine before marriage, should we divorce. Should we not, he is all set for life.

I don't think that her husband was a jerk, he obviously makes a lot of money if he is able to may off the mortgage, give up half of his retirement AND pay 74K/year for ONE teenager and wife. I'm guessing that the OP lived a very nice, upper class life before the divorce.

[Anonymous]

My DH has large inheritances and trust funds. If we were to divorce, I would not expect to get half of them. Why would I?

Especially if I had cheated! Good lord.

[Anonymous]

I believe inheritances should be shared. DH and I are a team!! We share,

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If he put the inheritance in a separate account and never mingled it with household accounts, yes, it is completely his and he does not have to give any of it to you.

+1 from personal experience.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I believe inheritances should be shared. DH and I are a team!! We share,

My DH shares his inheritances and trusts with me, too, but I would absolutely not go after them if we were to divorce.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I believe inheritances should be shared. DH and I are a team!! We share,

Spoken like someone who has never inherited anything. My spouse and I are happily marrried, and I share my annual distributions but my trust is protected in the event of dovorce. The idea of him cheating on me then assuming that he has the right to the money that my Mom slaved away to amass and protect makes me sick.

[Anonymous]

I'm the one who told you to question the account. Given the fact that all of the money was his inheritance, I think he is making a generous offer. Like the other pp's, my dh will likely receive an inheritance at some point. It will be his to spend as he pleases. If we were to divorce, I would not expect a penny.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I believe inheritances should be shared. DH and I are a team!! We share,

Spoken like someone who has never inherited anything. My spouse and I are happily marrried, and I share my annual distributions but my trust is protected in the event of dovorce. The idea of him cheating on me then assuming that he has the right to the money that my Mom slaved away to amass and protect makes me sick.

NP here - Don't assume that those who want to share have never inherited anything. I shared my inheritance. I handle all of our finances, and I definitely agree with the sentiment that DH and I are a team and we share.

[Anonymous]

How much did you inherit?