Why can't folks that send their kids to average colleges ever admit it?

[Anonymous]

Pretty sure the OP is a troll yanking our chains. No one IRL is that much of an ass and I went to an Ivy so know plenty of asses. Probably a high school or college student. Maybe the poster obsessed with graduating by age 22 since all his threads about that get deleted (although pretty sure the one about paying for 5 to 6 years of college is his).

[Anonymous]

Because as adults we see the result of Ivy/top 10 vs Maryland State Schools and other "average" or "below average" schools and there was not really a big difference in successful lives.

[Anonymous]

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Anonymous wrote:One of the big issues with OPs statement is that there doesn't seem to be a clear definition of an "average" college as opposed to an "above average" college. OP, what's your definition of an "average" college? I'd say that the top 50 national universities (as ranked by USNWR) are above average. The same goes for the top 50 LACs. Would you accept that definition OP?

No. Average to below. Top twenty: above average. Top ten: excellent.

Out of the top fifty: don't even bother. It's not worth the paper it's printed on.

Yeah, those people should just go work at Jiffy Lube. How dare they?

I wouldn't send them to Jiffy Lube, but I won't clear out my savings, retirement, home equity to send my children to a low ranked undergrad. And I most certainly wouldn't bend over backwards to spin that the college is some great place — which every parent of average kids does. Just give it a rest.

Wow. You are truly a terrible human being. Why do you even care if someone is excited about a low-ranked school? How does it hurt you?

It doesn't hurt me. It's just embarrassing your family. Sorry you lack self-awareness.

I think you're a bit confused on who is embarrassing here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The really great truth that none of us really wants to admit is that we have very little influence on how our children turn out. It's some random mix of genes and peers, as long as we don't do too much to screw things up. It's more luck than anything else. My DC happens to be an academic ace with a pick of the top 10 colleges. Yes, I'm proud of him but I'd be proud of him if he wasn't as smart and accomplished too. Love is not conditional.

But, I would be ashamed if he wasted his time trying to rank everything in the world and was too immature to understand how little those rankings matter. I wonder why the poster who thinks colleges outside the top 50 are "not worth the paper it's printed on." (I don't know any colleges that are printed on paper). If she truly believed that statement, she should encourage her children to write that worldview/value statement in their college essays. I'm sure Princeton will be really interested in a student who thinks that way.

This. My DC 1 is an academic superstar also with a pick of top colleges. My DC 2 is an average student most likely going to a tier 2 school. They are both going to be just fine in life. Different kids, different interests, different accomplishments. Where you go to college does not define who you are, your level of happiness or your ability to be successful in life. It does however, often contribute to the asshole factor, op.

[Anonymous]

Well over half the comments in this thread prove OP's point. Like moths to a flame.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well over half the comments in this thread prove OP's point. Like moths to a flame.

Umm, not really. You are missing the point entirely. There is nothing to "admit" because there is nothing wrong with an average kid and an average college. To "admit" something would suggest there is something to be ashamed about.

[Anonymous]

DH and I went to average colleges and have done just fine in life.

[Anonymous]

I think OP is just bitter because the people are truly happy. There is no "OOOOH lucky you, how I wish my kids could be at an amazing school like your kids attend - they must be so smart and accomplished - they are going to have so many advantages that mine don't - boy I wish mine had worked harder so they could be just like yours". Uh - no - those days are gone. It's more like "gee, that's great - you must have a lot of money in the bank to pay for that. Good for you". Sorry you don't get that we love and are proud of our kids, TRULY love their choices and are intelligent enough to know that the school where they attend for undergrad will not hold them back if they excel there - it is only the beginning. Success and happiness come in many different packages. Makes me wonder what happened to you along the way.

[Anonymous]

Look people in here are being tools (as per usual) but the OP has a point. People do have a tendency to try to "dress up" lackluster options. Just own your reality. You're average, your kid is average, your kid is going to an average school, your kid will have an average life. Like your average life. Could be worse. I'd rather be a humdrum average American suburbanite with a degree from UMD than a former elite Syrian refugee.

[Anonymous]

Omg - You are complete idiot.

[Anonymous]

err, I don't know what schools OP is sneering at. But, based on my experience, I would prefer my kids go to a solid big state school for undergrad, and save their money/snobbishness for grad school. You can get a world class education at UNC or UVA for much less money than any of the Ivies and without the hypercompetitive pressurecooker atmosphere and snob contingent. Plenty of dummards, but honestly they have those at Harvard too; they're just legacies.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sorry you don't get that we love and are proud of our kids.

Virginia Tech, for example, has a 70% acceptance rate. 1/4 fail out before graduating.

What has a kid accomplished getting into a school like VTech, or even less selective schools with de facto open door admissions? Nothing, yet. If you have money or take out loans, any kid with a pulse can go to a university. Parents of average kids need to quit doing gymnastics dressing up things that just aren't impressive.

[Anonymous]

Well, for some of us who weren't sure our kids would graduate from high school, the fact that he's three semesters away from graduating from an average university is exciting, indeed. People who know us are thrilled for him and for us. The fact that OP is rolling her eyes at us matters not one bit.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kids are in average colleges, mostly because they got great merit scholorships. I'll even proudly name the schools...

DS (27) went to Ole Miss. ROTC scholarship. Plus National Guard.
DS (25) went to Colorado. ROTC Scholorship
DD (24) went to Florida. National Merit Scholar. Full ride.
DD (21) at Georgia. Partial merit scholarship.
DS (17) High school senior. Wants to go to Florida. We'll see who offers the most money.

Super proud of all five. My oldest is married with a baby. They own a business together. He is also a Captain in the Army National Guard. My second is a Captain in the Army - 82nd Airborne. My third is a teacher in DC. My fourth is majoring in nursing. She wants to be a nurse practitioner. My youngest thinks he wants to be an engineer.

Average colleges. No student loan debt. Great kids.

LOVE

[Anonymous]

OP shows that some folks peak in college and spend the rest of their lives failing to get over it.