Has your child's teacher ever been really rude to you and what did you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd like to hear the teacher's side of this. I bet OP has had a constant stream of second-guessing and nitpicking questions and suggestions to the teacher all year, and the teacher has had it with her.

Could be, but this teacher still has no right to disrespect parents. The teacher also needs to learn to let it go if this is the case. Is maturity too much to expect?

I once lost it at a parent at a middle school where I used to teach. She was trying to defend her bully of a son, who had been torturing an overweight female classmate for weeks. The mom was indignant that I'd called her in and kept talking over me in defense of her child. She actually behaved a lot like her son, so I see where he got it. I don't feel sorry for the things I said to her. I was very harsh, very disrespectful, and loud enough to be heard over her droning needle voice.

Her child was eventually expelled for continuing bullying. I'm sure the mom remembers me as "really rude" for absolutely no reason.

Rude is beside the point here - you were unprofessional. Don't expect to be treated like a professional if you can't act like one, even when it's hard.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop volunteering so many hours. It clearly isn't appreciated. Don't volunteers for her anymore. School year is almost over so let it go.

I'm really surprised how many people say let it go. Maybe I will try. I have canceled my classroom volunteer hours for the rest of the year already. I guess I'm worried that if I let it go, she will think it is OK to treat me badly, and then maybe she'll think it is OK to treat my child badly...like she can get away with it or something. Obviously, she doesn't like me. Is that nuts? I guess it might be. I've just never encountered this kind of treatment before (at least not until I came to this school). I don't really know how to handle it.

I totally understand your frustration and that you are surprised wit the 'many let it go' advice from many. If not appreciated, at least you should be treated with respect. What she did is awful but since only few weeks are left, it is not a bad idea to pass it. The fact that you canceled all the remaining volunteering schedule should indicate to her what she did was wrong. But there seem to be too much tolerance here being afraid of retaliation.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Stop volunteering so many hours. It clearly isn't appreciated. Don't volunteers for her anymore. School year is almost over so let it go.

I'm really surprised how many people say let it go. Maybe I will try. I have canceled my classroom volunteer hours for the rest of the year already. I guess I'm worried that if I let it go, she will think it is OK to treat me badly, and then maybe she'll think it is OK to treat my child badly...like she can get away with it or something. Obviously, she doesn't like me. Is that nuts? I guess it might be. I've just never encountered this kind of treatment before (at least not until I came to this school). I don't really know how to handle it.

I totally understand your frustration and that you are surprised wit the 'many let it go' advice from many. If not appreciated, at least you should be treated with respect. What she did is awful but since only few weeks are left, it is not a bad idea to pass it. The fact that you canceled all the remaining volunteering schedule should indicate to her what she did was wrong. But there seem to be too much tolerance here being afraid of retaliation.

But by cancelling the rest of her volunteering, the OP is not punishing the teacher as much as she's punishing the kids. End of the school year can get busy and a lot of parent volunteers might be truly needed for end-of-year parties, field day, a lot of things from which OP's child benefits. But OP had to prove a point with the teacher by bowing out. Not the most mature way to handle it. It's the equivalent of "I'll take my toys and go play somewhere else."
I doubt OP cares about retaliation from the teacher this late in the year. Read the post and the follow-up. OP wanted her props for being super-duper (especially when she told the teacher, I could be spending my time somewhere else).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In this instance you should let it go. Sounds like she was in the midst of chaos and was frazzled and just snapped at you. If this is ONE instance in almost an entire school year of no problems, of course let it go.

She did not seem frazzled to me. I'm just not sure that it would matter if she was. It was really unprofessional, and I have done a lot to help her this year. I put in so many hours doing things for her that it actually affected my work. It actually got worse after that - I pointed out that I was volunteering my time and didn't need to be there (as calmly as I could), and she told then I should just get out. I mean, it was not a little "snap" - it was a major insult. Wasn't it?

She wants you out.

[Anonymous]

You infringed on her territory and she called you out. Maybe stop being so meddlesome and find another hobby?

[Anonymous]

Really, OP, this is so simple. Let go of your ego (which is the problem here) and just stop communicating with this woman. Do not volunteer any more. Do not contact her. Do nothing.

[Anonymous]

It is sad though that some teachers have such difficulty communicating with parents, especially the ones who are trying to help them.

[Anonymous]

It is sad though that some teachers have such difficulty communicating with parents, especially the ones who are trying to help them.

It is sad when a parent is trying to take time and attention away from the kids.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd like to hear the teacher's side of this. I bet OP has had a constant stream of second-guessing and nitpicking questions and suggestions to the teacher all year, and the teacher has had it with her.

Could be, but this teacher still has no right to disrespect parents. The teacher also needs to learn to let it go if this is the case. Is maturity too much to expect?

I once lost it at a parent at a middle school where I used to teach. She was trying to defend her bully of a son, who had been torturing an overweight female classmate for weeks. The mom was indignant that I'd called her in and kept talking over me in defense of her child. She actually behaved a lot like her son, so I see where he got it. I don't feel sorry for the things I said to her. I was very harsh, very disrespectful, and loud enough to be heard over her droning needle voice.

Her child was eventually expelled for continuing bullying. I'm sure the mom remembers me as "really rude" for absolutely no reason.

Rude is beside the point here - you were unprofessional. Don't expect to be treated like a professional if you can't act like one, even when it's hard.

It is not "professional" to let a bully and his bully of a mother harass you. As a parent who knows all too well how one kid's bad behavior can disrupt the learning of an entire classroom, I salute this teacher for standing up to these jerks. Thanks for be a professional and defending your students against this kind of behavior.

[Anonymous]

The teacher sounds like an insecure power hungry jerk who can't admit mistakes. That's unpleasant. I think it's fine to discontinue volunteering. But I wouldn't make more out of this than it is. Just let it go.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you stop volunteering, you're hurting the children as well as the teacher.

Since when is being treated rudely by an authority figure in front of a large audience, as a volunteer, something we should be modeling for our children? This assists in the formation of young students exactly how?

I think this thread is infested with weird trolls.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

It is sad though that some teachers have such difficulty communicating with parents, especially the ones who are trying to help them.

It is sad when a parent is trying to take time and attention away from the kids.

? This parent wasn't taking up a teacher's time unnecessarily. Your justification that a parent trying to take up your time is taking up time from the kids is a bit troubling. If that was the case, parents wouldn't be able to contact teachers at all. "Susie's mom wrote me at 8:00 pm while I was trying to get ready for the new day and now don't have enough time to plan for her child tomorrow." Parents and teachers are supposed to be a team to help the children. Not juts the parent or just the teacher. This mom was helping out, asked a simple question, and the teacher was rude.

[Anonymous]

This mom was helping out, asked a simple question, and the teacher was rude.

Go back to the beginning. The story changed a little--and, I'm pretty sure it was more than one question.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I'd like to hear the teacher's side of this. I bet OP has had a constant stream of second-guessing and nitpicking questions and suggestions to the teacher all year, and the teacher has had it with her.

Could be, but this teacher still has no right to disrespect parents. The teacher also needs to learn to let it go if this is the case. Is maturity too much to expect?

I once lost it at a parent at a middle school where I used to teach. She was trying to defend her bully of a son, who had been torturing an overweight female classmate for weeks. The mom was indignant that I'd called her in and kept talking over me in defense of her child. She actually behaved a lot like her son, so I see where he got it. I don't feel sorry for the things I said to her. I was very harsh, very disrespectful, and loud enough to be heard over her droning needle voice.

Her child was eventually expelled for continuing bullying. I'm sure the mom remembers me as "really rude" for absolutely no reason.

Rude is beside the point here - you were unprofessional. Don't expect to be treated like a professional if you can't act like one, even when it's hard.

It is not "professional" to let a bully and his bully of a mother harass you. As a parent who knows all too well how one kid's bad behavior can disrupt the learning of an entire classroom, I salute this teacher for standing up to these jerks. Thanks for be a professional and defending your students against this kind of behavior.

Different PP. No one questions that the bully and his mom needed to be put in their place. What was unprofessional were the items that I've bolded above. That is uncalled for. Interrupting a bullying parent to say something like, "I'm sorry, but in order for us to have the conversation, you'll need to let me discuss the issues that we have in class. If you won't let me discuss my concerns, then this interview is over and your child will have to deal with the consequences of his actions without your input." But to lose your temper, be harsh and disrespectful to a student or parent, is unprofessional and uncalled for. The ends do not necessarily justify the means.