Do women love their kids more than their husbands ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't get the whole "your husband will be there when you're old" logic.

Women have longer life expectancies than men; there's a very good chance my husband will predecease me, & it's my kids who'll be checking on me to make sure the nursing home staff are treating me right.

Most kids don't even visit their old parents in nursing homes. I have been in nursing homes and the only person who is there for old people is their spouse. Its not uncommon for spouse to die within days of each other in nurshing homes either.
All i am saying is. Your husband is supposed to,bd your life partner not your kids

[Anonymous]

I just think that a husband who competes with his own child for love and attention is setting himself up for failure.
However, the one who shares the love and the load is the one who will have his wife's gratitude and affection.

[Anonymous]

Do women love their kids more than their husbands ?

Nah! i just love my parents more ;0

[Anonymous]

Some of father's comments are kind of eye opener to me. I can sense my husband feeling this way too even though he never show it. I feel like after becoming a mom i forget about being a wife.

I loved the posts and comments here.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:No way for me. I think it is a completely different kind of love, for sure. I feel protective and a need to provide for my son. He is my everything. My husband is my strength. He is my absolute best friend. Don't know what I would do without either one of them, but surely there is no way I love either one more.

Well said. Children need one person to provide the financial support, and the other to provide stability and consistancy.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:No way for me. I think it is a completely different kind of love, for sure. I feel protective and a need to provide for my son. He is my everything. My husband is my strength. He is my absolute best friend. Don't know what I would do without either one of them, but surely there is no way I love either one more.

Well said. Children need one person to provide the financial support, and the other to provide stability and consistancy.

I don't know that I would phrase it quite like that. We are a one income family right now, but my husband absolutely does more than provide a paycheck for our family. He is very definitely a big part of our stability and consistency. Also, I helped to provide for us financially before our kids were born and I'll continue to do so when I go back to work...

[Anonymous]

Why you have to love one more than the other ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I was talking to a pastor once....He asked me, "If your child was drowning, and your husband (or wife) was drowning, and you are only able to save one, who would you save?" No hesitation, I said my child. He said wrong answer. WTF I thought? He then explained, that your husband/wife would be there for you when you are old, and when your children are gone. We raise our children to be independent and to leave our nest but not our spouse. We made vows before God to provide and protect our spouse. I still don't get it (I am not religious by any means) but just something to think about since it is on topic.

I am religious and think your pastor is WRONG.
That is a ridiculous hypothetical to pose as an indication of the covenant you made in Your marriage.
How stupid that people even compare love of a child to love of an adult.
Thst just shows what an immature and narrow view of love those people have.
GROW
UP!

I've heard of other pastors using that same sort of logic and I have never heard any parent say that they would sacrifice their child's life in order to save their own life or the life of their spouse. That would just be totally contrary to our (God given) parental instincts. I don't think it's supposed to be taken in a literal sense.

I think it used to be that way. I mean back then people used to put their spouse first and that is how I believe humanity survived.

Back when? And where? Marriage as a social institution hasn't existed everywhere and at all times.

I think the love for your children is totally different from the love for your spouse. For me, they occupy different parts of my heart. The relationship is totally different--the child is dependent on you, your husband should be your equal.

[Anonymous]

I love my husband more. But my child is only 4 months old now, maybe that will change?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love my husband more. But my child is only 4 months old now, maybe that will change?

Maybe you are saying kids more ?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I love my husband more. But my child is only 4 months old now, maybe that will change?

I feel the same way and also keep wondering if it will change as my son gets older. I hope not.

I know my mom loves us more than she loves our dad, and, honestly, it's a burden for me and my brother. I wish she would have invested more in her relationship with my dad over the years.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I love my husband more. But my child is only 4 months old now, maybe that will change?

I feel the same way and also keep wondering if it will change as my son gets older. I hope not.

I know my mom loves us more than she loves our dad, and, honestly, it's a burden for me and my brother. I wish she would have invested more in her relationship with my dad over the years.

I think those mom.who love their kids more and always put them first becomes mother in law from hell.

[Anonymous]

I don't get the posters who quip about divorce rates being higher and never really living spouse if you stated you love your child more. If you love your husband more, one could say you don't really love your kid after all too then.

[Anonymous]

[quote=Anonymous][quote=Anonymous]I think it is definately true
Today, not even three years after our wedding, I woke up in bed alone. Again. My wife, Susan, has slipped out to breast-feed our 2 years -old son, Jackson. Curled up with him on the extra bed in the nursery, she often falls asleep there. Which means she's not coming back to me. I know in my heart that my wife loves me. But could she actually love someone else even more?

At first, I thought, Who could honestly complain about this? A newborn needs and deserves all the attention you can give. In the beginning, I was eager to do every small task to make my wife, to make them, more comfortable, from fetching the bunny blanket to doing diaper duty. But lately, I've been feeling like my role has been reduced to being the family Jeeves. What about my needs?
When I encountered rival suitors during my dating years, I knew my best chance involved removing the other man from the equation. So I invited my wife out to dinner. Alone. Cagily, she professed to look forward to it. "Just us," I think she said. No sooner had we sat down at a nearby trattoria and drawn the napkins across our laps than it became clear there was no "just us," and there might never be again. "Would you call the sitter, see if he's okay?" Susan asked.
"We just left him five minutes ago," I pleaded over the glasses of wine we hadn't yet tasted. "I'm sure he's fine."
"But I miss him," Susan said. I knew there was no reasoning with that. Love is love. Soon after our entries arrived, she confessed that she wanted to get home to tuck him in. I paddleboated the plate of fusilli alla verdura into my mouth to keep up with her pacing, and we dashed home. Alas, alas! He was already asleep, and I made my move. "Let's go to bed," I said, and, after coaxing her there, complimented her lingerie: a nursing bra. "Those snaps in the front are very convenient," I joked. But I knew this convenience had nothing to do with me. Not only has my son taken control of my wife's every thought, he has enforced his presence on every inch of her body

My many friends told me the same thing they are experiencing. What baffled me was not their stories, but how unfazed they were by their emotional abandonment, as if they were, unlike me, resigned to the fact that they could never be as important as the kids. What's more, they warned me that talking about it with my wife would only make things worse, that my feelings of dissatisfaction or loneliness would only be belittled or lampooned. Of course, I had to learn the hard way.

There's no changing it. For the foreseeable future, in my wife's eyes, Jackson comes first. I come second. So who am I miffed at -- Jackson? Of course not. He's just being a toddler, and I love him. Susan? Well, maybe a little.
.
And Maybe over time I'll learn that my situation's not so bad. I begun to take my eyes off .

Sorry for the long post OP but I wanted to share this.
And that TED talk and mri scan are interesting.[/quote]

You sound like a giant boob. Emotional abandonment? Holy shit. I hope you're trolling. Whaaaaah whaaah, but what about MY needs, said the grownup. Look, your wife is dealing with two toddlers (you and the baby). One of them will grow up and need her less, and then the cycle of life will shift again. Thing is, if you keep mooning about like a deserted and resentful toddler yourself, wife will drop you as she should.

[/quote]

Many of you are absurd except for the people that understand that investing in your marriage is actually investing in your kid’s happiness and your kid’s future because the parents have a functional, great marriage. I am a man who tells my wife how beautiful she is everyday and how proud I am of her and makes sure everyday she knows I love her. And still in the last two years since she got pregnant and had our daughter, she hasn’t once said even thank you or that she’s happy or proud of me for anything. So tell me again how us men are absurd because we want attention from our wives?

We’re not looking for another mommy. We’re just looking to get back what we put into our wives. Many men end up cheating because of the simple fact they just want to feel companionship from the love of their life that they have molded their entire lives around. Without mentioning God himself or making it about God at all, woman now a days see TV shows and ADS in magazines and too many distractions from reality, and most have unrealistic expectations.

I haven’t cheated in 6 years since we met that October day in 2007 and never even had the urge too. It just sucks for us men sometimes to tell our partner how beautiful she is and how important she is on a daily basis and over a two year period I haven’t even thought she feels like that. When we have sex it gets better every time. I make sure her needs are met first before mine, even in sex. We have the hottest, passionate love life when she allows it to be present in our marriage. But the past two years we’ve been intimate less than ten times. It’s almost like women, after children, just look at it like they’re neglecting their children by having 30 minutes of alone time to make sure their relationship always remains strong. That’s the part that makes us men sick inside, that they have this maternal instinct inside of them that tells them spending an hour or even less focusing on us is neglecting their children.

Too many women watch too much of keeping up with the Kardashians and too much bachelorette and have completely convinced themselves that life should be a fairytale, and it’s just not that way. Society’s new standards have killed so many relationships because of women’s false hopes and totally denying their husband’s needs. These same women go cry to their friends when their man cheats or leaves them for someone who will pay attention to them for 30 seconds a week, maybe. It’s just like where do women get off making men feel like they’re not important??? And where do you get off coming on here and getting angry because you’re one of the women that will never truly have your husband’s love because you’re constantly fighting against the bond you have???

To all the women who think men are just being sissy’s; we’re not!!! We’re humans too and we all long for the embrace and love from our partners who we created these wonderful children with. So keep telling yourself that you’re a good wife and you’re a great woman while you come on here and subject your own husband who you married, into feeling like a sissy because he just wants a meaningful hug or kiss once every year.

I’ve noticed every woman I’ve met just about, who has kids and lived with their husband before their children came, never love them like that again for the rest of their life. Don’t blame a man because he doesn’t want to keep disappointing himself, hoping one day you’ll be able to show your love to him, waiting for you to snap out of it and realize that YOU’RE probably the reason he’s unhappy and YOU’RE the reason most men feel so bad and so angry all the time. Keep neglecting their needs and yours and keep coming on here insulting them and wondering why your marriage isn’t working.

Stone cold women don’t deserve a man that would die for them. It’s something that they can’t even take 5 seconds to greet him and act interested after he probably goes to a job he absolutely hates just to support them and the children. So keep telling yourself men are sissy’s and that most of you women don’t do anything wrong. I’ve noticed most women with kids treat their husbands horrible and have such a negative attitude all the time, but then wonder why he sits in his office all night and starts drinking the second he gets home from work and ignores you. It’s probably because he has felt ignored for years. So I hope your attitudes towards your husbands really helps your marriage out by how angry most of you women act.

[Anonymous]

Resentful husband poster:

I'm sorry you're so down. You sound like you have major issues, though, and I would not be surprised if your wife's behavior is in reaction to your angry, misogynistic attitude. "most" women you met don't love their husbands the same way? Pray tell, how would you know, are you spying? Do they confide in you? (Doubt that!). You just assume?

Honestly, you sound self-centered and petulant. It SCREAMS in your posts. Maybe it is for good reason, but how can we know? My advice: get to a marriage counselor. Maybe he / she will vindicate you, but then again, you may be shocked -- SHOCKED! -- to learn that it is not all your wife's fault. Go into marriage counseling with an open mind about how you and your wife can BOTH work to improve your marriage. Your jealousy of the kids needs to be addressed, though.