How do I express to close friends and family not to share utensils with my toddler?

[Anonymous]

I think sharing utensils is gross- and I don't share food with my children because they're the ones with all of the school / daycare germs!

My DH always feels the need to finish whatever the five year old leaves behind on his plate. For that reason, the two of them share a lot of colds and fevers.

But I agree that you shouldn't be vocalizing this in front of your little one- you don't want him becoming stressed out over germs.

[Anonymous]

We NEVER share utensils. That is gross. I think the positive ideas that some posters have given you are good ones. "he is practicing with his own spoon ect" Bring extra ones -- you an get the plastic wrapped ones from Costco or when you go out. Sharing a spoon with a toddler is a sure way to get sicker than you have ever been in your life, as they breed germs.
But the MIL hand washing is another story. Many older people have very delicate skin and cannot scrub scrub scrub as their skin will suffer greatly. So I would divide these two issues.
You may need to keep your toddler next to you at dinner if your family just won't obey simple rules of hygiene.
SHARING UTENSILS IS DISGUSTING and UNSANITARY. YUUUKKK!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:People have survived for thousands of years in unsanitary conditions. And still do today. Don't you think you could relax your standards a bit, OP? Unhelicoptering will benefit both you and your child. Really.

Yes and the average life span of those who are unsanitary is much shorter than here in the first world. But do what you want with your own kid.

[Anonymous]

If you seriously believe the dangerous germs come from friends' and families' utensils you are very misinformed. Your child will catch things from floors, play equipment, stores, cars, handles of everything and anything...but the chance your child will get sick from sharing utensils is low. People you go out to eat with will have the courtesy to not share when they are sick. That's more than you can ask from the entire rest of the world. Your child gets in touch with way worse things every day and everywhere. THAT'S why people here say "unclench". It's much more important to have your child learn proper hand washing technique and practice that. Teach not to touch stuff and put fingers in mouth. Teach to stay away from handles in public places - THOSE are serious germ parties.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We NEVER share utensils. That is gross. I think the positive ideas that some posters have given you are good ones. "he is practicing with his own spoon ect" Bring extra ones -- you an get the plastic wrapped ones from Costco or when you go out. Sharing a spoon with a toddler is a sure way to get sicker than you have ever been in your life, as they breed germs.
But the MIL hand washing is another story. Many older people have very delicate skin and cannot scrub scrub scrub as their skin will suffer greatly. So I would divide these two issues.
You may need to keep your toddler next to you at dinner if your family just won't obey simple rules of hygiene.
SHARING UTENSILS IS DISGUSTING and UNSANITARY. YUUUKKK!

I am one of those people. And you know what? I don't expect to hand feed another person's kid!

Hand sanitize or wash at least.

[Anonymous]

Pull that stick out of your ass, sweet pea!

[Anonymous]

Ugh. We have a friend who does this. We've stopped sharing meal time with them. If you asked for a plate of food to be passed "Oh.. remember to only use the serving spoon.. and take whatever is closest to you!" Yes, we know to use the serving spoon, thanks. We aren't heathens. If we turned the plate she hissed in a breath.

Two people wanted to share something. One took a portion WITH the serving utensil, set it on their own plate to divide it. She was mortified. If she had touched her plate with a utensil, she wouldn't even touch her own child's plate with it.. etc. Her dd wanted butter on something. Rather than mom taking some of the butter she already had on the side of the plate, she had to get up and get a new knife, and give dd her own bit of butter on her own plate. It gets ridiculous.

OP, don't pass your kid around the table. Keep him in his own seat next to you. That should solve the problem.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:OP, I'm going to side with you. My dentist told me people should not share utensils and cups with young children because we introduce bacteria from our mouths into their's. My husband thought it was just me being a germaphobe, but my father is an oral surgeon and he always told us to not share utensils. Well, fast forward to when I have a child, and my husband is poking fun at me for my policy in front of friends. My friend's sister, who is a dentist, jumps in and says I'm actually right. It can result in cavities in children who wouldn't otherwise get them.

Nope! Unless you have a strep mutans colony in your mouth, it is BENEFICIAL to share utensils with a child, as it introduces and recolonizes them with beneficial oral bacteria.

Basically, if someone in your family has horrible, horrible cavities, it's likely they have a strep mutans colony and shouldn't share utensils with your child. Otherwise, it's a good thing.

Signed, an oral and maxillofacial surgeon

[Anonymous]

Its a class thing. Members of a certain class do not double dip with utensils. They just don't.

[Anonymous]

We could share tissues, TP, napkins, let the dog lick in the mouth, recycle plates from the trash, share paper cups, share drinking glasses --so many things. But we just don't. To each his own.

[Anonymous]

I didn't read the thread but based on the subject, we say "We don't share utensils in this house and ask that you please wash hands before giving food to the baby/toddler."

[Anonymous]

Please tell me if there's a difference between hand feeding a child and handing them the food item (let's say a french fry).

[Anonymous]

If you're going to let relatives pass your toddler around the table, I think this kind of thing is going to happen. I agree with those who suggest you try to examine the sources of your anxiety and work at letting this go a bit.

[Anonymous]

Op - I agree with you. Utensil sharing is not something that you want your child to learn - if they do that at Auntie's house, why not at preschool with their friends.

And what if an adult is coming down w/something or has a cold sore flaring up? I'm sure that they would feel awful if they gave that to a little one.

It even grosses me out when I see a little one drop a pacifier at a park and the mom picks it up and sucks it "clean" for her kid - gross!!

[Anonymous]

Today I saw a woman in the store with her child wearing surgical masks.

EVERYONE STARED.