My adult children said they will never meet my SO

[Anonymous]

I hope op never gets to meet this grandchild. What a nasty person.

[Anonymous]

I don't want to meet her either and I say this as a 57 year old woman.

[Anonymous]

You talk too much, telling people what someone else said. You are messy.

[Anonymous]

I think it is the daughter who is posting as the father.

[Anonymous]

I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

If I were 22 I wouldn't want to meet dad's 30 y.o. girlfriend either. Suggests where dad's priorities are. Daughter will someday be 30 with toddler half-siblings or 30 and dad's new girlfriend will be her same age.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

If I were 22 I wouldn't want to meet dad's 30 y.o. girlfriend either. Suggests where dad's priorities are. Daughter will someday be 30 with toddler half-siblings or 30 and dad's new girlfriend will be her same age.

The girlfriend is very upset about it, and fights with the dad constantly about it, so don't think it'll work out. They've been dating six months.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Well I hope all this is fiction, OP. You've reached middle age without any sensitivity to other people's feelings, and without much in the way of filter, emotional control or sense of propriety.

I hope your children find happiness and success in life without you.

op is way past 'middle age' lol

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

If I were 22 I wouldn't want to meet dad's 30 y.o. girlfriend either. Suggests where dad's priorities are. Daughter will someday be 30 with toddler half-siblings or 30 and dad's new girlfriend will be her same age.

The girlfriend is very upset about it, and fights with the dad constantly about it, so don't think it'll work out. They've been dating six months.

Ridiculous. The girlfriend should be glad for peace and quiet. She was just about the right age to be a teen babysitter for them.

If the relationship lasts then the kids might warm up. But it's a bad sign that there's early stress about this. After all the dad's kids would likely never occupy any shared home as a full-time resident. The youngest must be almost out of high school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This entire post (and the other one) are nothing but troll bait.

There is no way in hell a 72 year old man is on DCUM and is using phrases like, "I told my girlfriend to extend grace..."

Clearly this is an upset adult daughter who does not like that her father is dating again and she has created this fictional story to get others' sympathy.

[Anonymous]

It's extremely common for men OP's age to need to be re-partnered immediately. In a way, it makes sense, because he doesn't know how to be a person on his own. He's always had a wife.

Every time I have seen this situation (recent widower, new relationship with inappropriate partner that adult children are opposed to), it's been part of the widower's grief experience. It never goes particularly well, if only because the women they date usually end up either controlling them/taking the money or leaving because they do not appreciate being a manifestation of someone's grief for their dead wife of 40+ years.

OP, consider that what you need is to build a life that supports you, not find a wife who will do that for you.

And apologize to your daughter for suggesting that she invite this woman to the birth of her child. You were wrong to suggest it, and every day that goes by without you acknowledging that and apologizing for it makes you more wrong. You've done a lot of wrong stuff in this situation, but this is the most wrong, so fix it.

[Anonymous]

I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

Not always true.

I've known MANY people who waited years before dating after divorce or death of spouse and those people (kind and loving ... and patient) were never accepted nor welcomed by kids, including those who were already adults.

The cold hard fact is that if you have kids and ever want to date again there is a high likelihood your children will not be supportive.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I have a relative whose young daughters refuse to meet his new girlfriend too, it's bizarre, this situation isn't like yours. He's 53 yo and his girlfriend is 30, the daughters are 17, 19 & 22. The parents have been divorced since the kids were little, so it's not a new divorce either.

If I were 22 I wouldn't want to meet dad's 30 y.o. girlfriend either. Suggests where dad's priorities are. Daughter will someday be 30 with toddler half-siblings or 30 and dad's new girlfriend will be her same age.

The girlfriend is very upset about it, and fights with the dad constantly about it, so don't think it'll work out. They've been dating six months.

They obviously see the 30 yo GF as a threat to the shared resources from their dad. She can pop out a few kids, and she will if given a chance, and all their dad's money and everything else he comes with, will be gone. It's their objective to break such GF and dad up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I guarantee that if you were to patiently date and find someone who was kind and loving, your kids would see your happiness and be supportive. Go do that.

Not always true.

I've known MANY people who waited years before dating after divorce or death of spouse and those people (kind and loving ... and patient) were never accepted nor welcomed by kids, including those who were already adults.

The cold hard fact is that if you have kids and ever want to date again there is a high likelihood your children will not be supportive.

I think it depends. As I just said, another partner is a threat to shared resources. Now if a dad starts dating a multimillionaire, I'm sure the kids would not mind a bit, in fact they'd encourage it. In reality oftentimes those women are poor divorcees or young 30 yo with nothing behind their name.