would you report a kid who is planning on breaking an ED for a EA school to your private high school?

[Anonymous]

1. It's easy to find out after the fact.

2. If a student breaks ED without a valid exemption why wouldn't high school counselor expel the student for attacking the school's reputation, before second semester starts?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Our school has an accomplished student who got into their top choice school in non-binding early action and now he is waiting until all their decisions come in to commit to thE #1 choice EA school. So annoying because they are going to gobble up the spots at these other schools that their classmates really want to go to. Yes, this kid is exceptional in stats/ECs and will most definitely get in over the other kids.

But what he's doing is legal. I know you feel stressed about it, but you knew that's how the game works. Kids are rivals within their grade-level.

I know it is legal. Our school tells the kid to do the ethical thing and pull your other apps if you are sure you are going to attend your restrictive EA school. They even give the parents a call to push this. There are always selfish families that stay in the game just to see where else their kid can get in. It is unethical and screws over your classmates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would notify the EA school anonymously that the student already has been accepted ED to the other. school. Include high school counselor contact info so the EA school can verify it. They will reject the application, and the student will then attend the ED school.

This about protecting your school’s rep with the ED school so that future students don’t pay an awful price for this one student/family’s ugly behavior. It is not about getting this kid punished. If that happens, they brought it on themself. But it should not be the goal.

You sound like a person who calls ICE if someone has an accent. You do not have all the facts. Don't be that person. It's not your job to protect your schools reputation. If this is a private school, they will take action if needed. Just focus on your own kid. Top schools take students they want. Sometimes they take 1 and sometimes many more. I say this as a 'compliant' private school mom.

[Anonymous]

If the kid was admitted ED, they will have to sign the contract and in most cases, submit a monetary deposit by the end of Dec, 2025 to reserve their spot.

If they break the contract later and tell the college "Never mind, I'm going to another unnamed school" the college will know that they did not rescind other applications and/or applied elsewhere and they will punish the high school for allowing this to transpire under their watch. There is no way to just do this under cover and nothing happens in isolation at small, top privates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would notify the EA school anonymously that the student already has been accepted ED to the other. school. Include high school counselor contact info so the EA school can verify it. They will reject the application, and the student will then attend the ED school.

This about protecting your school’s rep with the ED school so that future students don’t pay an awful price for this one student/family’s ugly behavior. It is not about getting this kid punished. If that happens, they brought it on themself. But it should not be the goal.

You sound like a person who calls ICE if someone has an accent. You do not have all the facts. Don't be that person. It's not your job to protect your schools reputation. If this is a private school, they will take action if needed. Just focus on your own kid. Top schools take students they want. Sometimes they take 1 and sometimes many more. I say this as a 'compliant' private school mom.

The words of a parent whose student is doing something wrong and doesn’t want to deal with consequences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would notify the EA school anonymously that the student already has been accepted ED to the other. school. Include high school counselor contact info so the EA school can verify it. They will reject the application, and the student will then attend the ED school.

This about protecting your school’s rep with the ED school so that future students don’t pay an awful price for this one student/family’s ugly behavior. It is not about getting this kid punished. If that happens, they brought it on themself. But it should not be the goal.

You sound like a person who calls ICE if someone has an accent. You do not have all the facts. Don't be that person. It's not your job to protect your schools reputation. If this is a private school, they will take action if needed. Just focus on your own kid. Top schools take students they want. Sometimes they take 1 and sometimes many more. I say this as a 'compliant' private school mom.

The words of a parent whose student is doing something wrong and doesn’t want to deal with consequences.

Lol, not at all! My child applied ED last year and pulled all apps. Private schools know what to do. You don't need to police them.

[Anonymous]

This kind of thing is also a real bummer for the kid because they have to remain quiet about the entire process at a point in time that they should be celebrating.

Regional admissions people 1000% check these high school Instagram pages. If your kid is supposed to show up to their ED choice and then breaks that contract and advertises matriculation elsewhere, they will see it.

I know a family whose kid broke an ED a few years back and the family did not breathe a word about where their kid was attending college until sophomore year. No posting on the high school's destination Instagram, the student's Instagram bio, the parents' Facebook pages, etc. They were on the down low for 18 months because they were worried that one or both schools would find out what they did and would rescind offers. It was the weirdest thing because with their older kid there were super vocal and excited and with this kid it was radio silence "Kid, what kid?"

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can see the interest that schools families would have in pressuring this family into not breaking the ED contract, so that future applicants from this school do not suffer consequences from this college.

But how is this conversation going to go, exactly? "Hi, I'm Larlo's Mom, and heard Larlito was planning on abandoning his ED pick and going to another college?" I mean, that makes you look crazy, OP. Your reputation is on the line if this is not true.

How about “the kids are all worked up because they’ve heard Larlito plans on not rescinding their app to USC even though they got in ED to Penn. I’m sure it’s likely just a rumor, but would be great if you could look into it.”

PP you replied to. It's still naming a young person who might be innocent. I would go as far as to inquire formally, in writing, for the school to confirm policy regarding ED decisions, and is expected to enforce ED commitments. Who at school is responsible for making sure that the student withdraws from other colleges once they receive an ED acceptance?

That should alert them that they need to supervise this year's acceptances...

Well if they're innocent, they're innocent. How is this bad for the kid?

Because if this is just a rumor and they're innocent, it will create a lot of bad feeling, and the family will feel put upon by others at the school (including OP). It's not fair to them. You can address it at the school level by reminding the school that they need to do their due diligence in supervising ED acceptances.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Report to whom? The high school counselor?

This should be reported to the colleges.

Unless you have seen the applications with your own eyes you are reporting hearsay to the schools and they should laugh and hang up on you.

This is not OP’s problem to solve. Would they like their own kid to be reported by strangers based on rumors or hearsay?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can see the interest that schools families would have in pressuring this family into not breaking the ED contract, so that future applicants from this school do not suffer consequences from this college.

But how is this conversation going to go, exactly? "Hi, I'm Larlo's Mom, and heard Larlito was planning on abandoning his ED pick and going to another college?" I mean, that makes you look crazy, OP. Your reputation is on the line if this is not true.

How about “the kids are all worked up because they’ve heard Larlito plans on not rescinding their app to USC even though they got in ED to Penn. I’m sure it’s likely just a rumor, but would be great if you could look into it.”

PP you replied to. It's still naming a young person who might be innocent. I would go as far as to inquire formally, in writing, for the school to confirm policy regarding ED decisions, and is expected to enforce ED commitments. Who at school is responsible for making sure that the student withdraws from other colleges once they receive an ED acceptance?

That should alert them that they need to supervise this year's acceptances...

Well if they're innocent, they're innocent. How is this bad for the kid?

Because if this is just a rumor and they're innocent, it will create a lot of bad feeling, and the family will feel put upon by others at the school (including OP). It's not fair to them. You can address it at the school level by reminding the school that they need to do their due diligence in supervising ED acceptances.

Beg to disagree, Not seeing how it will create any bad feelings at all. College counselor: "hey family, just circling back. Did Mary get into ED school and submit deposit and withdraw all other apps?" Family. "Yep, all set." College counselor. "Great! it was wonderful working with you this year."

End of story if all is on the up-and-up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can see the interest that schools families would have in pressuring this family into not breaking the ED contract, so that future applicants from this school do not suffer consequences from this college.

But how is this conversation going to go, exactly? "Hi, I'm Larlo's Mom, and heard Larlito was planning on abandoning his ED pick and going to another college?" I mean, that makes you look crazy, OP. Your reputation is on the line if this is not true.

How about “the kids are all worked up because they’ve heard Larlito plans on not rescinding their app to USC even though they got in ED to Penn. I’m sure it’s likely just a rumor, but would be great if you could look into it.”

PP you replied to. It's still naming a young person who might be innocent. I would go as far as to inquire formally, in writing, for the school to confirm policy regarding ED decisions, and is expected to enforce ED commitments. Who at school is responsible for making sure that the student withdraws from other colleges once they receive an ED acceptance?

That should alert them that they need to supervise this year's acceptances...

Well if they're innocent, they're innocent. How is this bad for the kid?

Because if this is just a rumor and they're innocent, it will create a lot of bad feeling, and the family will feel put upon by others at the school (including OP). It's not fair to them. You can address it at the school level by reminding the school that they need to do their due diligence in supervising ED acceptances.

Beg to disagree, Not seeing how it will create any bad feelings at all. College counselor: "hey family, just circling back. Did Mary get into ED school and submit deposit and withdraw all other apps?" Family. "Yep, all set." College counselor. "Great! it was wonderful working with you this year."

End of story if all is on the up-and-up.

Agree with this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I can see the interest that schools families would have in pressuring this family into not breaking the ED contract, so that future applicants from this school do not suffer consequences from this college.

But how is this conversation going to go, exactly? "Hi, I'm Larlo's Mom, and heard Larlito was planning on abandoning his ED pick and going to another college?" I mean, that makes you look crazy, OP. Your reputation is on the line if this is not true.

How about “the kids are all worked up because they’ve heard Larlito plans on not rescinding their app to USC even though they got in ED to Penn. I’m sure it’s likely just a rumor, but would be great if you could look into it.”

PP you replied to. It's still naming a young person who might be innocent. I would go as far as to inquire formally, in writing, for the school to confirm policy regarding ED decisions, and is expected to enforce ED commitments. Who at school is responsible for making sure that the student withdraws from other colleges once they receive an ED acceptance?

That should alert them that they need to supervise this year's acceptances...

This, plus possibly a request that the school generally communicate to families the necessity of kids withdrawing their other applications and acceptances upon being accepted ED.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:ED school is a regular destination for this private. EA school is TBD but kid plans to break ED choice if admitted.
Income/aid is not a factor (HHI high). This is making kids who are interested in both the ED and EA schools upset.

Yes; 100% would report that kid / family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Planning on breaking isn't the same as actually breaking. May happen or not. I would report to the counselor if they do actually break it but not based on talk of a vague plan.

+1 it's hearsay.

Plus, kids don't often tell the truth to their friends. It is very common for a kid to tell friends they were admitted ED when they were not, or be admitted but then have a financial issue causing them to seek to be released from the agreement. Plenty of motivation to lie or not tell the whole truth.

The counselor can figure that out after a complaint is made.

I would keep in mind that the counselor will be writing Mid Year Reports for all students, including The Whiner's child.

Who writes mid year reports on all the kids? Our school does not and most colleges do not want anything formal from the kid, let alone the high school. A mid-year report is a relic of private school college admissions in 1995.

Relic? Many, perhaps most, colleges require a Mid Year Report per Common App, including ED1 schools.

A "mid year report" is Common App speak for TRANSCRIPT, not an essay from the counselor.

The counselor has the opportunity to say more about the kid if they wish.
https://commonapp.my.salesforce.com/sfc/p/#d0000000eEna/a/Vz000001xfhh/oyCTqS8_Wkm1.C8vJLVfO4qkK0V6QnKSL87JeMkpVKE

[Anonymous]

Wow. MYOB