Overly Invested Parents

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, we aren't talking about the US national team or pro club practices. This is pay to play soccer, whether you like it or not. If I want to watch my DC's practice in its entirety, I have every right to. Not once has a coach had to speak to me or anyone else for that matter. As someone said earlier, I would like to know how my money is being spent. I know the difference between a good training session and a bad one. I know the difference between a good coach and a bad one.

People seem afraid that your DC might be in jeopardy of being labeled because a parent chooses to watch a whole practice even if its every single week? Only an insecure coach would be bothered. As long as I am paying, I will choose what I want to do with my time.

What's your soccer pedigree to know if the coach is running the best training sessions?

It doesn't take a soccer pedigree to determine if a practice is weil run or not... that is a silly question.

Then how else do you know?

I didn't know soccer knowledge and expertise was common sense

Hmmmm....

Players constantly standing in line, not well run

Players distracted and constantly messing with or playing around with their teammates, not well run

Players/team not improving, not well run

Coach constantly stopping practice to pontificate for 10+ minutes, not well run

Coach berating constantly berating players, not well run

Players constantly missing practice or practices with very low participation, not well run

Coaches constantly distracted on their phones or with other coaches/parents, not well run

etc etc etc ... c'mon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, we aren't talking about the US national team or pro club practices. This is pay to play soccer, whether you like it or not. If I want to watch my DC's practice in its entirety, I have every right to. Not once has a coach had to speak to me or anyone else for that matter. As someone said earlier, I would like to know how my money is being spent. I know the difference between a good training session and a bad one. I know the difference between a good coach and a bad one.

People seem afraid that your DC might be in jeopardy of being labeled because a parent chooses to watch a whole practice even if its every single week? Only an insecure coach would be bothered. As long as I am paying, I will choose what I want to do with my time.

What's your soccer pedigree to know if the coach is running the best training sessions?

It doesn't take a soccer pedigree to determine if a practice is weil run or not... that is a silly question.

Then how else do you know?

I didn't know soccer knowledge and expertise was common sense

Yes. After a few seasons with multiple kids in travel, it doesn't take long to identify a well run practice vs a bad one.

Hmmmm....

Players constantly standing in line, not well run

Players distracted and constantly messing with or playing around with their teammates, not well run

Players/team not improving, not well run

Coach constantly stopping practice to pontificate for 10+ minutes, not well run

Coach berating constantly berating players, not well run

Players constantly missing practice or practices with very low participation, not well run

Coaches constantly distracted on their phones or with other coaches/parents, not well run

etc etc etc ... c'mon

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

You on dmv forum

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

You on dmv forum

yes i used to live here for a long time and the soccer forum is very much national

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

You on dmv forum

gatekeep much? it's a forum on the internet

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:People, we aren't talking about the US national team or pro club practices. This is pay to play soccer, whether you like it or not. If I want to watch my DC's practice in its entirety, I have every right to. Not once has a coach had to speak to me or anyone else for that matter. As someone said earlier, I would like to know how my money is being spent. I know the difference between a good training session and a bad one. I know the difference between a good coach and a bad one.

People seem afraid that your DC might be in jeopardy of being labeled because a parent chooses to watch a whole practice even if its every single week? Only an insecure coach would be bothered. As long as I am paying, I will choose what I want to do with my time.

What's your soccer pedigree to know if the coach is running the best training sessions?

It doesn't take a soccer pedigree to determine if a practice is weil run or not... that is a silly question.

Then how else do you know?

I didn't know soccer knowledge and expertise was common sense

Yes. After a few seasons with multiple kids in travel, it doesn't take long to identify a well run practice vs a bad one.

Hmmmm....

Players constantly standing in line, not well run

Players distracted and constantly messing with or playing around with their teammates, not well run

Players/team not improving, not well run

Coach constantly stopping practice to pontificate for 10+ minutes, not well run

Coach berating constantly berating players, not well run

Players constantly missing practice or practices with very low participation, not well run

Coaches constantly distracted on their phones or with other coaches/parents, not well run

etc etc etc ... c'mon

You are right. I feel there is no harm in watching at the U-Littles ages U9-U12. This is reasonable and I would consider myself an "Invested Parent" but not an "Overly Invested Parent." There is a difference. I watch also, mostly because I have been on 2 teams where the coaching/ training environment has been sub optimal. Then you figure out why and leave the team for better one.

Overly invested parents would criticize their player, talk with the coach frequently, yell instructions or comments to the players during the games, complain loudly, blame others for their player's lack of success, ask the coach about private training, and generally spend lots of resources to push training onto young kids.

Invested parents, would mostly observe and adjust as needed = equals normal behavior.

Uninvested parents, usually are often parents who have gone through travel sports w 2 older kids already, just show up to games and hope their kids decide to do another activity, or often skip out on practices/ late to games and don't respond to any team messages.

[Anonymous]

This...

Self-righteous parents - give people definitions of their own world view and expect others to understand

[Anonymous]

The worst is when the helicopter parents have money or perceived clout and trash talk your kid to the coach. They have no problem stomping on other kids to get their kid a roster slot and then a starting position. Whatever it takes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This...

Self-righteous parents - give people definitions of their own world view and expect others to understand

This...

Someone attacking other posters for trying to help define the parameters of the thread. This forum is full of posts like this above, just one-line attack posts. How about try to contribute something useful instead?

[Anonymous]

Soccer parents, look at the mirror by watching football parents in Netflix. You’ll find your own persona 🤣

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

Not a national forum you just proved yourself wrong. Parents in the bushes is a DMV thing for sure LOL!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The worst is when the helicopter parents have money or perceived clout and trash talk your kid to the coach. They have no problem stomping on other kids to get their kid a roster slot and then a starting position. Whatever it takes.

I agree. We had to send out a message to parents that talking about other players will not be tolerated. And it is even poor form to shit talk other kids to your own kids. Because when you do, their own kids essentially tell on their parents by saying, "my mom or dad said this about you..." There are some real jerks out there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I honestly didn’t realize that watching your child practice was discouraged. The field is about 45 minutes from my home, and as a parent of an only child, I naturally want to be there for her. I work all day on my computer, so by the time practice rolls around, I’d rather not sit in the car or walk around aimlessly. Parking is also limited, and if I leave, there’s no guarantee I’ll find a spot again.

I simply enjoy quietly watching my child practice—never interfering with the coach or distracting anyone. In fact, my child doesn’t even acknowledge me during practice, which I respect. I just want to be nearby in case anything happens, and yes, sometimes I chat with other parents—just normal, friendly socializing.

It’s disheartening how quick people can be to judge other parents. We’re all just trying to do our best, and being present for our children shouldn’t be something we’re made to feel guilty about.

No shame at all - we drive far enough that it makes no sense to go back home, so occasionally my wife and I will go grab some dinner and watch about 45-60 mins of practice. My daughter doesn't mind it at all and enjoys discussing parts of the practice with us on the way home. We're also at a large facility with 8+ fields so we just sit up on the hill out of sight.

See the bushes are a perfectly reasonable place to watch from

ugh, sure? we're not in the DMV and there are 0 bushes around. Just several hundred feet away elevated so you can actually see what's happening.

Not a national forum you just proved yourself wrong. Parents in the bushes is a DMV thing for sure LOL!

it's really hard to read your posts? what the hell are you saying? - maybe take a timeout