How to deal with Deposits May 1st if you are still on a waitlist elsewhere?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess. Although there is a mechanism for consequences for doing so and they are choosing to take that risk. I’m on the fence if that is unethical.

We thought it was unethical. Our HS counselor at private also warned us about it.

We literally did the accept WL and unenroll from other university within minutes and my son wrote an email to AO rep also. We lost $900 but that is clearly written as well. May 1st deposited/accepted. May 7th off the WL- accepted spot and withdrew acceptance at the other school.

I wouldn’t play around with ED either. It also leaves a mark on your HS for future kids if you don’t follow the agreement.

[Anonymous]

HS Counselors and consultants have an obligation to scare you when it comes to double depositing…..but the reality is that it is NOT illegal. And IF a university dares to rescind admission to a student who double deposited they would be sued so fast that the amount of money they would spend on litigation would be the equivalent of giving away 100% merit awards to more than 100 kids…

From another website: “Andrew Flagel, former SVP for Students and Enrollment at Brandeis University, once suggested to his colleagues:

“I really like when the argument gets all fired up as a debate on ethics. It seems particularly charming that the same universities that are sending massively manipulative marketing materials (oh how I love alliteration) and providing entirely opaque information on scholarship and financial aid policies [that] they manipulate behind the scenes, then call students unethical for not being able to make up their minds by May 1…. I know I’ll catch a lot (A LOT) of flack for this, but it isn’t unethical, it’s a purchasing decision (let the flack begin!). You can place deposits on any number of items (say a car, just to draw the comparison most likely to inflame my colleagues) and decide NOT to make that purchase without being in the least unethical, can’t you?”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:HS Counselors and consultants have an obligation to scare you when it comes to double depositing…..but the reality is that it is NOT illegal. And IF a university dares to rescind admission to a student who double deposited they would be sued so fast that the amount of money they would spend on litigation would be the equivalent of giving away 100% merit awards to more than 100 kids…

From another website: “Andrew Flagel, former SVP for Students and Enrollment at Brandeis University, once suggested to his colleagues:

“I really like when the argument gets all fired up as a debate on ethics. It seems particularly charming that the same universities that are sending massively manipulative marketing materials (oh how I love alliteration) and providing entirely opaque information on scholarship and financial aid policies [that] they manipulate behind the scenes, then call students unethical for not being able to make up their minds by May 1…. I know I’ll catch a lot (A LOT) of flack for this, but it isn’t unethical, it’s a purchasing decision (let the flack begin!). You can place deposits on any number of items (say a car, just to draw the comparison most likely to inflame my colleagues) and decide NOT to make that purchase without being in the least unethical, can’t you?”

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

Why? Because living in limbo land sucks. Why is anyone encouraging or supporting their kid in dragging out a decision among current choices for another month (beyond May 1?). What is the benefit to your own kid?

My kid has 3 fantastic choices. We are doing revisits but I want this all settled by May. There is no way it's going to benefit her to have another month to live in limbo while all her friends are wearing their college gear, displaying their choice at grad parties, planning their rooms, etc.

How does it benefit my kid AT ALL to spend another month thinking, "huh, choice A or choice B?" It's not like she's going to get some additional info about the schools between May 1 and June XX. The current students will be gone for the summer. The campus will be empty, etc.

[Anonymous]

My kid for once was just admitted to an Ivy today. very weird, 1 week after Ivy day. we dont know what happened, but it did.. He didnt think he had a chance.

He needs more than 30 days to decide….I dont care if you dont like it or dont understand why. But it is what it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid for once was just admitted to an Ivy today. very weird, 1 week after Ivy day. we dont know what happened, but it did.. He didnt think he had a chance.

He needs more than 30 days to decide….I dont care if you dont like it or dont understand why. But it is what it is.

An Ivy began pulling from the WL *today*, April 4? That's the interesting part of your post. That's unusual. (If people were to guess, they might guess Columbia, but that might not be correct. Curious which one it was.

On your kid's indecision, yes he needs some time to decide. Are they giving you until May 1? That should be more than enough time for your kid to visit and figure it out, assuming you know the financial aid situation.

Maybe your kid is shocked, and maybe he needs to visit and I get that, and maybe your kid is freaked out by this, which I also get, but making a rational decision should not actually take 30 days. It could take a weekend.

My kid is on waitlists (not for Ivies) and is not sure they will be able to make a fast decision, but it's all what you put into it. Many people work best under deadline pressure. If there were no deadline, they would simply take longer to dig into the website, to hem and haw over the vibe, etc.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

Why? Because living in limbo land sucks. Why is anyone encouraging or supporting their kid in dragging out a decision among current choices for another month (beyond May 1?). What is the benefit to your own kid?

My kid has 3 fantastic choices. We are doing revisits but I want this all settled by May. There is no way it's going to benefit her to have another month to live in limbo while all her friends are wearing their college gear, displaying their choice at grad parties, planning their rooms, etc.

How does it benefit my kid AT ALL to spend another month thinking, "huh, choice A or choice B?" It's not like she's going to get some additional info about the schools between May 1 and June XX. The current students will be gone for the summer. The campus will be empty, etc.

Maybe a kid wants to visit campuses during spring break before they make a final decision. Who cares? They have their reasons ok? You are being too dramatic about living in limbo. Sit in that discomfort in not knowing because the feeling of knowing is a fallacy. Maybe use that month to volunteer in a soup kitchen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

Why? Because living in limbo land sucks. Why is anyone encouraging or supporting their kid in dragging out a decision among current choices for another month (beyond May 1?). What is the benefit to your own kid?

My kid has 3 fantastic choices. We are doing revisits but I want this all settled by May. There is no way it's going to benefit her to have another month to live in limbo while all her friends are wearing their college gear, displaying their choice at grad parties, planning their rooms, etc.

How does it benefit my kid AT ALL to spend another month thinking, "huh, choice A or choice B?" It's not like she's going to get some additional info about the schools between May 1 and June XX. The current students will be gone for the summer. The campus will be empty, etc.

Maybe a kid wants to visit campuses during spring break before they make a final decision. Who cares? They have their reasons ok? You are being too dramatic about living in limbo. Sit in that discomfort in not knowing because the feeling of knowing is a fallacy. Maybe use that month to volunteer in a soup kitchen.

Huh? So I'm dramatic because I think my kid needs to decide by the May 1 deadline?
Ok, sure.

And last I checked spring breaks were over long before the end of April.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I guess. Although there is a mechanism for consequences for doing so and they are choosing to take that risk. I’m on the fence if that is unethical.

So your argument is that because they lay out consequences, it isn’t unethical for someone to choose to take the risk and double deposit anyway? Does that mean it’s not unethical to steal because I know the punishment and I decide to take the risk and steal anyway?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My kid for once was just admitted to an Ivy today. very weird, 1 week after Ivy day. we dont know what happened, but it did.. He didnt think he had a chance.

He needs more than 30 days to decide….I dont care if you dont like it or dont understand why. But it is what it is.

Well it's unethical. As well as sad that your kid cannot decide in 30 days. You take your top choices, then re-evaluate and make a decision. Also visit the top 3-4 (if you can afford it), to help with the process. But a kid qualified to gain admission to an Ivy should be capable of making a decision

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

Why? Because living in limbo land sucks. Why is anyone encouraging or supporting their kid in dragging out a decision among current choices for another month (beyond May 1?). What is the benefit to your own kid?

My kid has 3 fantastic choices. We are doing revisits but I want this all settled by May. There is no way it's going to benefit her to have another month to live in limbo while all her friends are wearing their college gear, displaying their choice at grad parties, planning their rooms, etc.

How does it benefit my kid AT ALL to spend another month thinking, "huh, choice A or choice B?" It's not like she's going to get some additional info about the schools between May 1 and June XX. The current students will be gone for the summer. The campus will be empty, etc.

Maybe a kid wants to visit campuses during spring break before they make a final decision. Who cares? They have their reasons ok? You are being too dramatic about living in limbo. Sit in that discomfort in not knowing because the feeling of knowing is a fallacy. Maybe use that month to volunteer in a soup kitchen.

And spring break is 100% before May 1. So yes, you visit, research, talk to alumni/studetns, and make a decision by May 1. You have a full month to do so. And you have known since last summer that the month of April is for planning how to decide (ie planning to visit). But not being able to decide in a month is wrong, and I'm not sure how your kid will function at college in the fall if they cannot.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My kid for once was just admitted to an Ivy today. very weird, 1 week after Ivy day. we dont know what happened, but it did.. He didnt think he had a chance.

He needs more than 30 days to decide….I dont care if you dont like it or dont understand why. But it is what it is.

Well it's unethical. As well as sad that your kid cannot decide in 30 days. You take your top choices, then re-evaluate and make a decision. Also visit the top 3-4 (if you can afford it), to help with the process. But a kid qualified to gain admission to an Ivy should be capable of making a decision

Just because you, private counselors who sell their souls to colleges and universities that are only really looking out for their themselves think that my kid should decide in 30 days doesn't make it so.

My kid WILL take more than 26 days, whether you like or not. And he WILL likely double depositing whether you like it or not. Call it unethical all you want. It is not like he will keep two schools on a leash for 3 months. I’m sure he will decide soon.

Your opinion about what my kid should or should not do is completely irrelevant to me. MY kid is clearly “capable” as you put it, and YET he wants more than 26 days to decide the rest of his life. Tough that you or colleges dont like it. I would love for one of them to rescind the admission on the basis of double depositing. I guarantee we wouldn’t even have to go far on the courts to get the school to pay up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you have the money why not double or triple deposit? Every school has a waitlist and they make money off of forfeited deposits

Why? Because living in limbo land sucks. Why is anyone encouraging or supporting their kid in dragging out a decision among current choices for another month (beyond May 1?). What is the benefit to your own kid?

My kid has 3 fantastic choices. We are doing revisits but I want this all settled by May. There is no way it's going to benefit her to have another month to live in limbo while all her friends are wearing their college gear, displaying their choice at grad parties, planning their rooms, etc.

How does it benefit my kid AT ALL to spend another month thinking, "huh, choice A or choice B?" It's not like she's going to get some additional info about the schools between May 1 and June XX. The current students will be gone for the summer. The campus will be empty, etc.

But not being able to decide in a month is wrong, and I'm not sure how your kid will function at college in the fall if they cannot.

What a bunch of BS. So my kid wont function in college because he failed to respond in 26 days? You live in laland. Go away.

[Anonymous]

What Ivy WL is moving???
Please tell.