Anonymous wrote:OV from the oldest of several siblings from first marriage here.
Dad remarried much younger women. Initially, she was OK with 1st marriage kids. Then, once they had their own baby (the first baby for his wife), everything completely changed. We lived within walking distance, but were no longer welcome to stop by. All focus shifted to their family and child. Dad was the sports dad for my sibs--no more. We were marginalized and then they moved across the country after taking a new job opportunity, it her urging.
We last saw half-sibling at age 10 and were erased as a family. I am not even sure their friends and neighbors of the last 2 decades even know there was a first marriage and children. My siblings and I have not had any contact in two decades; our attempts to connect with half-sibling post college were rebuffed.
While not wealthy, we were UMC (she was not; a very smart college finaid recipient), and somehow she managed to get everyone cut off prior to weddings, etc. One sibling was left to cover her own college expenses at a state college while half-sis was busy riding horses, attending fancy K-12 private, then private univ. and grad school.
In hindsight, dad married a selfish moneygrubbing b**** and apparently raised one too.
So getting back to your question, it takes a lot--everyone has to be genuinely willing to make it work. Dad's wife was not, and he was not about to have a second failed marriage, so we just vanished! Good luck!
Did your stepmom work? Is it possible she's the one who paid for horses, private school, university and graduate school for her kid?
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