At School, When Do You Think Is the Appropriate Age to Discuss Same Sex Relationships With Children
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Anonymous
Hahaha, this is so cute! |
Anonymous
| We’ve never really discussed it. We don’t come across same sex couples in our daily life. |
Anonymous
Michelle Duggar enters the chat |
Anonymous
NP and we don't either. Obviously I'm aware they exist there just aren't any among the group of parents of the kids we hang out with nor are there any on the streets near our house. Makes sense statistically because there's what like 6% or so of adults that are LGBT? |
Anonymous
It’s hard to track but more recent data suggests Adults under 30: 17% identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual Adults 30 to 49: 8% identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual Adults 50 to 64: 5% identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexual Adults 65 and older: 2% identify as lesbian, gay, or bisexua I’ve lived all over the US and in Europe and I’ve never lived anywhere without some lgbtqi people. |
Anonymous
Some of this might be the age of your child as well. Once your kid is in a class with 25 other children, there's a good chance one of them will have same sex parents eventually. But it's also about proximity/geography. My neighborhood is full of families with two moms. Probably 8 or so families within a two block radius. That tight concentration leaves fewer queer families for other neighborhoods, which is their loss! |
Anonymous
PP here and both of my kids are in elementary school. I mean sure there could be esp since my kids only hang out with some of the class. Both of mine are girls so that 50% of boys they're not hanging out with and beyond that it's like maybe 6 or 7 girls tops each year, each class they're hanging out with. I suspect the concentration of LGBT population is higher in cities than suburbs (i.e. Fairfax county in my case) so if you take that 8% from the PP for 30-49 year olds (which is already a small number) and assume it is a little lower in the suburbs it's perfectly reasonable that we haven't encounterd any same sex couples. |
Anonymous
Don’t they already know it from their community? DS had a classmate with 2 same sex parents from K, so it was what it was. It was the norm from K. |
Anonymous
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“Sometimes men love women
And sometimes men love men And then there are bisexuals but they’re just kidding themselves…la la la lala laaaa” Children’s song by Phoebe Bouffay |
Anonymous
I work with 20 somethings and all the young women insist they are bisexual but are dating and living with men. So I take these stats with a grain of salt. |
Anonymous
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do you not have any gay friends? seriously in this day and age? some kids have two dads, some kids have two moms, and some have just a mom, and some have just a dad, etc.
kid has known about this since he was 3? like he isn't an idiot, he know that he has a friend with two moms. |
Anonymous
My kid had a number of friends with two moms or two dads, including one of his very best friends. He had been to their house many times, they'd been to our house, they went to a preschool that was conscious about celebrating all kinds of families. When he was 5, and they'd been BFF's for 2.5 years we had a conversation about the word "gay". He told me it meant "when two men or two women are 'in love' and kiss and stuff". He then told me that he didn't know anyone who was gay. When I said "what about Larla's moms?" he looked at me like I had two heads. I asked him why he thought they lived together and he said "they have to live with each other, they have the same kid." It was a very surprising moment to me, because like many people on this thread, I had assumed that having friends who were part of gay families would be enough and my kid would grow up seeing LGBT people and families as equal. But in reality the messages from the world about how romance and romantic love are only for straight couples are strong, and I needed to be clear about counteracting those messages. It turned out fine, he's a nice open minded kid now, but I think it's important to know that it's great for kids to have friends from all kinds of families, but that simply knowing families isn't enough, and conversations, perhaps supported by books etc. . . are also needed. |
Anonymous
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The other day I asked my son if he knew his friend from school has 2 dads.
My son is in 3rd grade and said “yeah he has a dad and a stepdad” I said I don’t think so, I think his dads are married to each other. And then my son asked how that is possible and how his friend got born? I explained science and technology and doctors and medicine and adoption that there’s a lot of different ways that families are made. We’ve tried to normalize same sex relationships since he was very young, but I’ve also been very frank about sex and how babies are made. I do think it’s a lot for them to process. |
Anonymous
So you mentioned the ethical issue of two men renting a woman’s womb? |
Anonymous
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Teach them when it comes up IRL. My kids only know that kids have moms and dads. When they ask more questions I will answer them.
There is no reason to tell them about sexual preference now. Also, since I am with my kids the whole day at home and they are only in the school with the whole class, I do not have a fear of them being sexually exploited by caregivers, at least in the near future. We do not have LGBTQ++ couples in our orbit or our community. |