The Virginian Memorial Day Tournament 2024

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm a ref. …I did ask for some feedback. … Feedback is the only way we get better. Sure, parents give feedback, but usually not in an objective and helpful way. ...

Never talk to a ref, I couldnt give 2 $h*ts what you think as a parent. If you think you can do better, take the course and get out of the fields and ref yourself.

Taking these comments together, does this mean parents by definition should not give feedback directly to a ref at all no matter how polite or constructive they think their comments may be? Can they still give feedback to someone else? What about positive feedback, or feedback not actually related to soccer (ex. ref showed up really late, or showed up drunk, says racist/islamaphobic/biased things, etc.)

I don’t have an agenda by the way, just honestly want to know.

Why would you EVER think that is appropriate? They don't work for you. *You* are completely irrelevant to the activity at hand.

Weeeellll actually ….

Does your paycheck come from the club? If it does, then yeah you do sort of work for the parents that make your life miserable haha

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm a ref. …I did ask for some feedback. … Feedback is the only way we get better. Sure, parents give feedback, but usually not in an objective and helpful way. ...

Never talk to a ref, I couldnt give 2 $h*ts what you think as a parent. If you think you can do better, take the course and get out of the fields and ref yourself.

Taking these comments together, does this mean parents by definition should not give feedback directly to a ref at all no matter how polite or constructive they think their comments may be? Can they still give feedback to someone else? What about positive feedback, or feedback not actually related to soccer (ex. ref showed up really late, or showed up drunk, says racist/islamaphobic/biased things, etc.)

I don’t have an agenda by the way, just honestly want to know.

Why would you EVER think that is appropriate? They don't work for you. *You* are completely irrelevant to the activity at hand.

Weeeellll actually ….

Does your paycheck come from the club? If it does, then yeah you do sort of work for the parents that make your life miserable haha

That is entitlement personified if i've ever read it...so your logic is because you're paying the club to have your DC play soccer, and the club pays the tournament to play and the tournament pays the refs that ipso facto the refs works for you because you're the one paying? So if you drive a Tesla, does Elon Musk work for you?

[Anonymous]

I thought the club pays the refs, not the tournaments or the league. But correct me if I’m wrong.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I thought the club pays the refs, not the tournaments or the league. But correct me if I’m wrong.

It all depends on the league/assignor. Sometimes i'm paid directly on game day by the home team and sometimes I'm paid from the assignor. Tournaments are paid via the ref assignor of the host club, not the individual teams that attend the tournament - it's part of the tournament fees that the team pays

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

I'm a ref. …I did ask for some feedback. … Feedback is the only way we get better. Sure, parents give feedback, but usually not in an objective and helpful way. ...

Never talk to a ref, I couldnt give 2 $h*ts what you think as a parent. If you think you can do better, take the course and get out of the fields and ref yourself.

Taking these comments together, does this mean parents by definition should not give feedback directly to a ref at all no matter how polite or constructive they think their comments may be? Can they still give feedback to someone else? What about positive feedback, or feedback not actually related to soccer (ex. ref showed up really late, or showed up drunk, says racist/islamaphobic/biased things, etc.)

I don’t have an agenda by the way, just honestly want to know.

At half time and after games, the three referees are usually discussing and asking each other...what did I miss? What can I do better? and giving each other feedback. That's usually plenty of feedback for me. I'm never looking for feedback from parents, but, if I'm not in a rush, I'm always willing to discuss Laws of the Game and how and when they are applied with parents after the game.

Thank you, that was helpful!