Daycare vs. nanny

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell me more about cons of a nanny, pls, except cost. Not talking about a young person in the park bringing your kid to the park for 10-15 min, then strapping them back in the stroller and heading for the mall with friends, but "the real thing". The one who arrives on time every day, does planned activities, goes to the park for 2 hrs, then hot lunch and a nap, who adores your child and they love her back. So, what are the cons?

You as the parent are solely responsible for hiring and managing this person who may or may not deliver what they promise. In a child care center, a director hires and oversees staff, takes care of background checks and gets checked on by licensing.

You are relying on one person who can get sick and is entitled to take time off. In a good child care center they have extra staff to ensure compliance with ratios when staff are out sick.

Your children will be in your home with you if you work from home. If your children are at daycare then your home will be much quieter.

I think you’re overestimating what this entails. I doubt it’s that different than communications with a daycare center. We have a great nanny and the employer aspect has never been a problem.

Not in my experience. Having every day to map out with the nanny food, activities, schedule etc was MORE work.

I’m sure there are unicorn nannies that are also mind readers but for me it added to my mental load.

You shouldn’t need to do this for a decent nanny.

I never have to plan activities, schedule etc and my nanny buys groceries for the child with our credit card.

I don’t think you’re looking for a unicorn nanny. It’s a nanny’s job to choose age appropriate activities and entertain the child without screens.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Quality daycare center all the way your baby will be much more stimulated learning to socialize. Verbal skills will come quicker and they are much happier.
If you have a nanny and they don’t feel like putting in top quality work every minute of every day, your baby gets short changed

babies dont socialize. have you ever observed a daycare class and see how babies behave? even at the toddler age there is very limited socialization. they play in their separate little bubbles, until one toddler wanders into the space of another and grabs his/her toy, then they hit each other and cry.

But I understand parents need something to feel good about if they choose daycare, so I smile and nod when I hear someone go on about how much their 6 months old is enjoying the "socialization."

You can know the facts and not make people feel bad for their personal choices.

Maybe I have a unicorn toddler but my 22 month old is really verbal (like has been using 2-3 word sentences for a while) and super interactive with other kids. She has 2 school-aged siblings and she inserts herself in their games all the time. She claps and has dance parties with us. She knows the names of her daycare classmates and we talk about them at home.

Not saying this means daycare is right for everyone. But my toddler definitely plays reciprocally with other kids. In fact I think she is my most advanced kid because she gets SO much socialization between daycare and older siblings/their friends. She’s basically always had other kids around since birth.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:We considered a nanny, but like one of the PPs above, I did not want to be in the role of an employer/boss. Just not something I wanted to deal with. We sent our 3 to daycare and had no regrets. Our daycare center was excellent and the kids looked forward to going every day. They did get sick with the occasional respiratory illness, but not enough to be draining my PTO.

This worked for us in part because I have a flexible remote job that doesn't care what hours I work, as long as I meet the deliverables and attend all the required meetings. [url]If I had a demanding or time-bound job, and/or a long commute, we'd probably have gone the nanny route[b].

This is an interesting point. Of my friends who have nannies, they all work out of the home and need someone available late hours on occasion. Whereas friends who use daycare tend to have more flexible, WAH jobs.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell me more about cons of a nanny, pls, except cost. Not talking about a young person in the park bringing your kid to the park for 10-15 min, then strapping them back in the stroller and heading for the mall with friends, but "the real thing". The one who arrives on time every day, does planned activities, goes to the park for 2 hrs, then hot lunch and a nap, who adores your child and they love her back. So, what are the cons?

You as the parent are solely responsible for hiring and managing this person who may or may not deliver what they promise. In a child care center, a director hires and oversees staff, takes care of background checks and gets checked on by licensing.

You are relying on one person who can get sick and is entitled to take time off. In a good child care center they have extra staff to ensure compliance with ratios when staff are out sick.

Your children will be in your home with you if you work from home. If your children are at daycare then your home will be much quieter.

I think you’re overestimating what this entails. I doubt it’s that different than communications with a daycare center. We have a great nanny and the employer aspect has never been a problem.

Being an employer is NBD when you have someone good. But when they are bad it is a nightmare. And there are no guarantees, even with references.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Tell me more about cons of a nanny, pls, except cost. Not talking about a young person in the park bringing your kid to the park for 10-15 min, then strapping them back in the stroller and heading for the mall with friends, but "the real thing". The one who arrives on time every day, does planned activities, goes to the park for 2 hrs, then hot lunch and a nap, who adores your child and they love her back. So, what are the cons?

You as the parent are solely responsible for hiring and managing this person who may or may not deliver what they promise. In a child care center, a director hires and oversees staff, takes care of background checks and gets checked on by licensing.

You are relying on one person who can get sick and is entitled to take time off. In a good child care center they have extra staff to ensure compliance with ratios when staff are out sick.

Your children will be in your home with you if you work from home. If your children are at daycare then your home will be much quieter.

I think you’re overestimating what this entails. I doubt it’s that different than communications with a daycare center. We have a great nanny and the employer aspect has never been a problem.

Being an employer is NBD when you have someone good. But when they are bad it is a nightmare. And there are no guarantees, even with references.

And even one who starts great can go downhill. Another doctor mom suggested we only keep any nanny for two years. I was gobsmacked, our nanny was so great, I wouldn’t trade her for anyone! By the end of year three, I was so over her. So much creep of paying for her emergencies, more unexpected time off that I’m taking off work for, no more house tidying, etc.

I know lots of doctors who cld easily pay for a nanny but get sick of the BS aspects of being an employer and switch to daycare by 1-2 years old. I am counting the days til ours starts daycare (joining her brother who had brought home every virus under the sun already, so net even there)

[Anonymous]

All three of my kids have been through daycare and there are always plusses and minuses. I'd say if you have the money, etc, just go for the nanny. I think my kids are social butterflies (much to my introverted chagrin) so they are doing well at daycare and they learn from other kids. But quite frankly, when they're just at home with a babysitter and can sleep in their own beds, etc, it's just better. Also, drop off and pick up suck. IN either situation, you're at the whim of someone else if they're sick or closed, etc, so that's kind of a wash, but I'd have to imagine that the baby is healthier with a nanny (and you will be too as you'll catch less crap from them, lol!)
Either way, do what's right for your family. A careless nanny is worse than a highly vetted daycare for sure, but just do your due diligence in either case. Good luck!

[Anonymous]

doctors are, sorry to say, the cheapest employers ever. You do not have to take time off when your nanny is sick, you get a substitute care lined up. Say you simply do not want to pay for that. Also, no one has to "tidy" your house except yourself. There is not enough time in the day for a nanny to do that even if she was willing.

[Anonymous]

My 3 have always gone to daycare, but we do not live in an area where professional nannies are a thing. I would have preferred the nanny route, but the candidates we found either no call no showed for the interview, requested to bring their own child(ren) with them, or otherwise raised flags. Our youngest is starting K next year, but the constant sickness is really rough during the infant / 1 year old ages.

Also, our first two started kindergarten pre covid- daycare staffing and ratios for them were so much more consistent. Now my son has a revolving door of teachers, and even though it is an expensive Montessori school, it is essentially babysitting. Daycares everywhere have experienced crazy shortages and turnover since then. Our school used to guarantee 1:3 for infants (which meant 3 teachers for 7 babies from 8-4, to accommodate breaks). Now it is a lot more leanly staffed

[Anonymous]

What is the going rate for a nanny for a one year old in the DC area (friendship heights, tenleytown, cleveland park)?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What is the going rate for a nanny for a one year old in the DC area (friendship heights, tenleytown, cleveland park)?

Answer will
Depend on age, experience, driver, CPR etc….

[Anonymous]

$28-30

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What is the going rate for a nanny for a one year old in the DC area (friendship heights, tenleytown, cleveland park)?

Answer will
Depend on age, experience, driver, CPR etc….

$25 an hour at least, paid on the books. So more like $30 once you count sick and vacation time, and your share of payroll taxes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My 3 have always gone to daycare, but we do not live in an area where professional nannies are a thing. I would have preferred the nanny route, but the candidates we found either no call no showed for the interview, requested to bring their own child(ren) with them, or otherwise raised flags. Our youngest is starting K next year, but the constant sickness is really rough during the infant / 1 year old ages.

Also, our first two started kindergarten pre covid- daycare staffing and ratios for them were so much more consistent. Now my son has a revolving door of teachers, and even though it is an expensive Montessori school, it is essentially babysitting. Daycares everywhere have experienced crazy shortages and turnover since then. Our school used to guarantee 1:3 for infants (which meant 3 teachers for 7 babies from 8-4, to accommodate breaks). Now it is a lot more leanly staffed

Our no frills daycare center had a lot of turnover in 2021. Every few weeks there was a new assistant teacher. Since then very low turnover. The lead teachers and assistants in her room have all been there the last two full school years and a couple have been there longer.