Suspect house cleaner is stealing

[Anonymous]

I knew ours was stealing because I had just photographed a ton of brand name toddler clothes to be sold online and then put them away in a spare closet. I had photos of everything. Then when I went to actually list them, about half the items were missing. She was the only one who had been in the house. So I let her go. The sad part is that if she had just asked, I would have given her the clothes. I’m not aware of a young child in her life (she’s 50’s and didn’t mention grandchildren) or I would have just offered them up. But I can abide stealing - feels like such a violation. She clearly thought I wouldn’t notice some clothes missing from a spare closet.

[Anonymous]

Can’t

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My cleaner is the master of putting things in random places. It’s like a little treasure hunt every time she leaves. The best was the TV remote in an unused cabinet drawer.

Ours too!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you have kids? Bc I would suspect them first!

yes but they're grown and live elsewhere.

NP. Is this OP posting above about having grown kids? Because someone posted earlier, responding to "Clean your own house," saying how they wanted to do fun things with their kids rather than scrub the toilets. I thought that person posting was the OP.

So for the actual OP -- young kids you want to have fun with, or grown kids who live elsewhere?

I wish OPs would make the tiny effort to identify themselves in replies. This came up on another thread I saw recently when answers started to get confusing about which people posting were or weren't the OP responding to questions. Yeah, I know, anonymous site, anyone could claim to be an OP, but...still.

Oh, and OP, you should have zero expectation of gettig your stuff back like you said you want. You already said (if that was you) that you figure she's selling the clothing, right? So why do you have any expectation she'd give you back items you think she's sold--? Put up cameras if you want but if she sells things as soon as she steals them -- IF she is stealing -- having evidence on camera does nothing but help you fire her. It won't get stuff back that's long gone.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The iPad thing is the giveaway that this whole post is fake. OP could easily locate the iPad. And it’s not useful to steal any more than a iPhone is. Although I guess it wouldn’t be any stupider than stealing a shirt.

Not the OP, but: Someone who steals things as random as a few items of clothing and an iPad may have no idea how "useful" a used iPad is or isn't. Might just be picking up a piece of electronics, figuring that electronics generally can be sold for at least something. You seem to be picturing a savvier thief who knows not to take phones of a certain age or older tablets etc. Thieves who are stealing whatever comes to hand are not necessarily that savvy. This is, if she's actually stealing which isn't assured, a cleaner picking up items here and there that she thinks won't be missed -- not a professional thief.

OP already addressed the "why can't you just locate the iPad" issue earlier in the thread. If there's something that must be switched on, in the settings, to make the device trackable, OP hadn't switched that on. OP said she or he already tried to locate the iPad through the tracker or whatever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:She always cleans when I am at work, so I don't have much interaction with her. She does know we have cameras outside the house and can see her coming and going.

You’re a gool

???

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:My mother gave our cleaning lady “hand-me-downs” to deter stealing.

Because it’s a given that cleaners will steal so you have to head them off? Nice.


We hired undocumented workers. Marni was a saint. Never a day off, always reliable. She broke a vase once and was in tears. We told her it was ok, it wasn’t worth anything, it didn’t mean anything to us.
After ten years she and her family moved back to Brazil and bought a farm. She recommended her friend to take her place.

A neighbor asked why she didn’t refer her friend to work for her. I knew it was because she was a demanding b@tch. Cheap too. No bonuses. No paid holiday or vacations.

You give your cleaners holidays/vacations? Bonuses I get, but how do you work holidays? Just giving them random days off with pay?

[Anonymous]

I'm sorry. I'm missing a LV Speedy bag, and I'm pretty sure someone who works for us and has access to the house took it. I haven't said anything, nothing else seems to be missing and we adore this person and they'd be hard to replace. I don't what the answer is.

[Anonymous]

Rule number 1 stop letting anyone in your closet. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

I lock my closet. No entry -No opportunity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:IME whenever I suspect something like this it is always my own mistake and paranoia and the person is innocent.

+1
- I am careful to remove any valuables before the cleaning lady comes to clean.
- I do not have stealable things.
- I have cameras everywhere.
- I am at home when the cleaning lady comes.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm sorry. I'm missing a LV Speedy bag, and I'm pretty sure someone who works for us and has access to the house took it. I haven't said anything, nothing else seems to be missing and we adore this person and they'd be hard to replace. I don't what the answer is.

Honey they did you a favor.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:IME whenever I suspect something like this it is always my own mistake and paranoia and the person is innocent.

+1
- I am careful to remove any valuables before the cleaning lady comes to clean.
- I do not have stealable things.
- I have cameras everywhere.
- I am at home when the cleaning lady comes.

Same. Never have had anything stolen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Can you ask her? I mean you'll be able to tell very quickly if she is guilty of not. It gives her the opportunity to return the items and I guess, get fired.

If she isn’t stealing she won’t want work with someone who makes her feel like a criminal.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Clean your own house.

NP: this is not helpful. For example, I work full time, as does DH and we would rather spend time doing fun things with our kids than with them standing in the doorway of our bathroom talking while we're scrubbing a toilet. So we hire someone to clean for us. Nothing wrong with that.

My point is: cleaners stealing something is a cost of doing business for someone who hires domestic help and doesn’t pay them well enough. You seem uniquely bothered by it, like it may be more stressful than average for you, and like this thing that is supposed to be saving you time/focus may not actually be giving you those things because of it.

So you might consider whether having a cleaner is actually a net good in the way that you thought it would be.