What is the defining trauma of your life?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend split when I told him I was pregnant. I was 20 years old. This was unfathomable to me because I was under the impression that couples stayed together through thick and thin.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There's a lot of far fetched nonsense on this thread and then a ton of gullible soap-opera watchers eating it all up.

You're pathetic.

I hope you're thankful that you haven't had some of the experiences on this thread. And since you seem to lack empathy, how about moving on to another thread. The politics forum is perfect for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childhood sexual abuse

Childhood illness where I nearly died

Murder

Another murder

TBI

Married a narcissist that eventually raped me

Kids with special needs

IEP meetings

Autoimmune disease that took nearly 20 years to diagnose while doctors told me it was all in my head. I’ve been sick for so long.

It's "who" not "that" when you refer to a person. "That" is for objects, "who" is for people.

The pp said she was raped, and the most you can do is point out a grammatical mistake?? You. Are. A. Complete. Asshat.

Sure, she wrote that she was, but absolutely nothing on this thread written by anyone is necessarily true, you do realize that?

I'm that poster that you don't believe. Pardon my grammatical error.

[Anonymous]

Nothing really. I have been very lucky I guess.

My daughter was born with severe health issues, several months in nicu followed by months of 24-hr care, ng tube, tracheostomy, apneas etc. That wasn’t fun. But I don’t think it really caused trauma, I hope it made me more empathetic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There's a lot of far fetched nonsense on this thread and then a ton of gullible soap-opera watchers eating it all up.

You're pathetic.

I hope you're thankful that you haven't had some of the experiences on this thread. And since you seem to lack empathy, how about moving on to another thread. The politics forum is perfect for you.

You completely missed the point. I have not listed my traumas here, nor have I made any new ones up for you to salivate over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childhood sexual abuse

Childhood illness where I nearly died

Murder

Another murder

TBI

Married a narcissist that eventually raped me

Kids with special needs

IEP meetings

Autoimmune disease that took nearly 20 years to diagnose while doctors told me it was all in my head. I’ve been sick for so long.

It's "who" not "that" when you refer to a person. "That" is for objects, "who" is for people.

Wow, what is the trauma that caused you to behave this way? I'm not being flippant, I really think you should seek therapy to find out what compells you to nitpick a person who is hurting. You really don't need to blurt out everything that crosses your mind.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:When I was 8 and my mother told me "Don't ever have children, they'll ruin your life."

I spent my life -- and many years in therapy, trying to prove to her I wouldn't ruin her life.

And here i am at 61 still recounting it. (With 2 fabulous kids now in college.)

My mom said something terrible to me when I was 8, too. It was the first time I contemplated suicide. Mothers hold so much power over their children. I understand the lasting impact of her poor treatment of me and I am raising my children differently. I am aware of my power to build up or harm them and I choose my words carefully, always thinking before I react.

[Anonymous]

Unfortunately too many to choose from

-Growing up with an alcoholic dad

-Dad attempted suicide when I was a teen that landed him in a coma followed by psych stay

-First boyfriend raped me many many times over 2 years, but I didn't full understand that rape can still happen within a relationship- I just thought I had to deal with that when he needed it.

-Truly think I broke the 4+ generational cycle of alcoholics, abuse, and cheating in every marriage in my extended family. Was so incredibly proud of myself until I found out my DH was actually 3 years into an affair.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Childhood sexual abuse

Childhood illness where I nearly died

Murder

Another murder

TBI

Married a narcissist that eventually raped me

Kids with special needs

IEP meetings

Autoimmune disease that took nearly 20 years to diagnose while doctors told me it was all in my head. I’ve been sick for so long.

It's "who" not "that" when you refer to a person. "That" is for objects, "who" is for people.

Wow, what is the trauma that caused you to behave this way? I'm not being flippant, I really think you should seek therapy to find out what compells you to nitpick a person who is hurting. You really don't need to blurt out everything that crosses your mind.

Catch up and read the thread. Not everything people declare here is true or real. Having that knowledge stops you from getting overly invested in what is written.

[Anonymous]

Being a good baby that was left in a playpen because my mother was too overwhelmed with an abusive husband and too many kids. I am a diagnosed sociopath and feel no emotions about anything.

[Anonymous]

Having the crap beaten out of me almost every morning before school. Bullied by parents. A mother who lies. Drug interventions for my crack addict brother. Catholic school.
I am a walking miracle.

[Anonymous]

This reminds me of when I went through a severe trauma and as a result started watching a lot of true crime TV because it made me feel better to see other people who had really horrific things happen to them or their loved ones. It put my trauma in perspective and made me feel less sorry for myself.

I think that might be what the OP is doing.

[Anonymous]

My mother's suicide. She didn't complete it, but was technically brain dead with organ failure when I found her with her dog. She'd yelled at me to leave her alone the day before. She wanted time to follow through. It took her another five days to actually die. My youngest was 14 months old. It was Xmas.

[Anonymous]

Cancer. Total loss of medical innocence. Every ache and pain is now a reason to worry. Life feels like a countdown until recurrence now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Unfortunately too many to choose from

-Growing up with an alcoholic dad

-Dad attempted suicide when I was a teen that landed him in a coma followed by psych stay

-First boyfriend raped me many many times over 2 years, but I didn't full understand that rape can still happen within a relationship- I just thought I had to deal with that when he needed it.

-Truly think I broke the 4+ generational cycle of alcoholics, abuse, and cheating in every marriage in my extended family. Was so incredibly proud of myself until I found out my DH was actually 3 years into an affair.

Painful to read. I am so sorry and wish you everything good. You deserve better.
FWIW Internal Family Systems (Richard Schwartz) has been life changing for me.