Mother in law is a copy cat (petty post)

[Anonymous]

Your MIL might also be on the Autism spectrum like my mom is. She does this exact thing to me and although it bothers the crap out of me, I understand that she has social issues and honestly can’t even make a decision on her own without someone approving it first. Mental illness also comes into play with Mothers who display this behavior. Usually BPD can play a factor with women like that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your MIL might also be on the Autism spectrum like my mom is. She does this exact thing to me and although it bothers the crap out of me, I understand that she has social issues and honestly can’t even make a decision on her own without someone approving it first. Mental illness also comes into play with Mothers who display this behavior. Usually BPD can play a factor with women like that.

My MIL used to copy me a lot and she was later diagnosed with BPD and bipolar disorder. She went as far as to edit her Facebook profile and claim she went to my college, lived in all my previous towns (but nowhere she actually lived), and sent friends requests to my entire friend list including randoms from high school etc. I was really creeped out. Once I understood she was BPD, it helped me put her behavior into context. I do have to occasionally, firmly tell her to stop. For example I'll complain about something at work and she'll say she understands because she had my job (not even remotely close to true). Or she talks to me at length about how she trained for the Olympics as a runner (I casually run for fitness-- she never ran and her story is impossible for various reasons). I don't like when her behavior gets in the way of authentic connection but otherwise I ignore it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Petty post…I’m sorry at times this gets at me.


My mother in law keeps copying me. We are over 40 years apart. We have different skin tones yet she will buy the makeup colors I wear. I’ve gotten into green colored clothing and now suddenly after our trip, this woman who only wore gray black and dk brown is wearing green and proclaiming she’s colorful. I started wearing super baggy jeans and now she’s ordered similar pairs. My earrings she saw the pearls and had to have the same. She saw my phone and cover combo. Had to get the same.

If this was my sister or even sister in law. It would NOT bug me.

I totally understand. Mine took it to the next level. She is acting strangely all the time and she is comparing her wrinkled face to mine and often gets annoyed by it. She had some work done over the years, lost tons of weight just to look slim because I am. She asks my husband about everything we do and eat and of course she will copy that. She wears the same hair style and has hair colour I do. She wears the same nails colours, same shape, same dress styles and colours, jewellery, shoes, from trainers to wellies etc. Thankfully she can't wear high heels anymore but yet has to bitterly compare hers swollen ankles to mine. I feel extremely unconformable near her and started to wear unattractive clothing when seeing her. Got so bad I stopped wearing make up and just look like a little grey mouse... Grrrrrrrrrrrrrr!

[Anonymous]

I would feel nothing but pity for the MIL. How embarassing.