We chose not to redshirt DS without considering the long-term consequences:

[Anonymous]

Nope, you are blaming your child's age instead of your poor parenting and his natural skills. He wasn't good at his instrument, that's not because of his age, it's because he didn't practice or he wasn't a natural. He didn't pass math. That's because he wasn't good at it/he didn't study, not his age.

My brother's birthday is Dec. 31st. He started K at 4. He went to top schools, he made the Varsity soccer team his junior year, he's an accomplished surgeon who has been interviewed on the national news.

Sorry to debunk your theory. Looks like your kid is just a slacker.

[Anonymous]

The issue is not when he started—you are fixated on that. There is something else going on and you have failed your kid by refusing you figure out what is going on.

[Anonymous]

I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

[Anonymous]

It depends on the kid. And the family.

I was youngest with Nov bday from IL and I loooooove being youngest of my grade.

DH has Sept bday was redshirted and thought it was a good decision.

DS birthday is early Aug and was youngest till 4th grade when we redshirted. It's the right move as he's smaller and later dev but also has dyslexia abs ADHD. I wish we could buy another year! Lol

DD has Dec bday and is older in her class. With her personality, no prob.

I truly believe everything is as it should be because as youngest or oldest in a class you will always have issues. It's a matter of managing expectations upfront and realizing what that looks like before the day comes. It's also hard for DS to be older for example knowing his friends are younger and taller. I mean you can't really win the game. More important is about maturity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

OMG, tell your brother it's time to leave kindergarten now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

I skipped kindergarten, started first grade when I was five, and didn't grow up to be a soft little chud like your brother.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

you cannot be serious

[Anonymous]

In my child's CES (aka GT) program; there were 2 kids who were an entire year younger than everyone else, they had not only skipped a grade, they had also still gotten into the gifted program despite being a year younger.

You're weirdly fixating on this. But...which school lets a 4 year old November kid go into K? Maybe a 4 year old in late august who will be 5 in the beginning of September. But 4 in November? No way. I think this is fake.

[Anonymous]

This is fake. Redshirting is holding your kid BACK a year, not going early. Public schools will not take anyone who is not 5 by the Sept cutoff dates.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:In my child's CES (aka GT) program; there were 2 kids who were an entire year younger than everyone else, they had not only skipped a grade, they had also still gotten into the gifted program despite being a year younger.

You're weirdly fixating on this. But...which school lets a 4 year old November kid go into K? Maybe a 4 year old in late august who will be 5 in the beginning of September. But 4 in November? No way. I think this is fake.

Ny has Jan-dec cutoff. In this area, it’s September, so November/December kids are already old.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:In my child's CES (aka GT) program; there were 2 kids who were an entire year younger than everyone else, they had not only skipped a grade, they had also still gotten into the gifted program despite being a year younger.

You're weirdly fixating on this. But...which school lets a 4 year old November kid go into K? Maybe a 4 year old in late august who will be 5 in the beginning of September. But 4 in November? No way. I think this is fake.

Ny has Jan-dec cutoff. In this area, it’s September, so November/December kids are already old.

DC used to have an end December cutoff too, as well as other states. This was probably the case when the OP's son was young. Even now Virginia has Sept 30, while other states have Sept 1 or earlier, so you can get some weird age discrepancies between regions.

My kid was wedged between a Sept 1 private school cutoff and Sept 30 Virginia cutoff. He started at a private school according to their guidelines, but when he moved to Virginia public schools, it looked like he was red-shirted because kids the same age could be a year ahead.

[Anonymous]

Your kid didn’t practice his instrument enough, should have gotten math tutoring and should have gone to classes his freshman year of college.

Has he convinced you his failings are his fault or are you unable to see his faults so scramble to find another excuse? Either way, this is ridiculous.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

OMG, tell your brother it's time to leave kindergarten now.

Your brother sounds seriously maladjusted.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Your kid didn’t practice his instrument enough, should have gotten math tutoring and should have gone to classes his freshman year of college.

Has he convinced you his failings are his fault or are you unable to see his faults so scramble to find another excuse? Either way, this is ridiculous.

He did go to classes his freshman year. The problem was that he was still in a high-school mentality when it came to studying due to his immaturity.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I agree that it's better to be the oldest, but not for any of the reasons you mentioned. My parents have been cut off by my brother for not redshirting him. I have a March birthday, so I was already on the older end by default. My brother, however, has a December birthday, and our parents sent him to Kindergarten when he was 4. He was fine academically, but socially, he suffered greatly. Anytime our parents need help with something, it's all on me because my brother always refuses to help, his reasoning always being something along the lines of, "Why should I care about their needs? They evidently didn't care about my needs when they sent me off to Kindergarten so young."

OMG, tell your brother it's time to leave kindergarten now.

Your brother sounds seriously maladjusted.

Because he wasn't redshirted!