Why are you dead set on being hateful and mean on here?

[Anonymous]

Over a decade ago, the DC City Paper did an article which deemed DCUMAD:

“The Mommy Fight-Site”

DCUMAD has always been full of mean people. DC is full of mean, unhappy people, who overwhelmingly move here from someplace else, due to work.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Just a curious question to OP: do you not find most women in the DC area to be quite rude in person, as well? Many of them are fairly monstrous in person.

Not OP. But yes, I think people in this area are pretty terrible. We have tried to leave several times but our jobs only exist here. Our kids are adamant about not staying here.

I feel this way too and I've lived here for nearly 20 years. I am sometimes shocked by how rude and judgmental people are. Or just lacking in basic courtesy. Like something I've noticed is common is that people here really struggle with how to handle basic interactions with someone you know but not well. So much weird behavior. You just smile and say hello, maybe exchange a banal pleasantry or two, and then move on. But people here seem to really struggle with this. I have met people who are openly hostile when someone they know says hello to them at the playground or on the street. And I'll say "oh, did you not know them?" and they'll be like "it's some family from school, I can't remember their names."

You don't even have to remember their names. You can just say hello and be pleasant. You can smile and compliment their kid or say "such a great day for a walk -- enjoy!" Or whatever. But so many people here will act cold and rude simply because you are not their BEST friend. It's because they feel awkward. But you don't have to be awkward. You just need to think through some basic people skills and try a tiny bit, and then this stuff will be normal and and no big deal.

I've heard that Silicon Valley (where I lived for a time) has a lot of behavior like this because there is a high percentage of people there on the spectrum or with social issues. But DC is worse, IMO. And it's sort of inexplicable to me because out there I'd meet someone with few social skills and they'd turn out to be a coder or a finance person who deals in numbers all day. Here I'll meet people who are insanely rude with limited social skills and then I'll find out they work in fundraising for a non-profit or something. What?! How. This place is so weird.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Over a decade ago, the DC City Paper did an article which deemed DCUMAD:

“The Mommy Fight-Site”

DCUMAD has always been full of mean people. DC is full of mean, unhappy people, who overwhelmingly move here from someplace else, due to work.

Google this site.

There are newer articles that use adjectives like “catty” in describing DCUMAD.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here,

I'm referring to when someone asks a question because they are trying to solve a problem or get advice, and everyone starts piling on about something irrelevant.

Ex. The post about the suspended license. The OP is asking about if a mistake was made (and then found that it was) and people piled on about "You were speeding!!" "You are a danger to society!". Like if this person paid their fines, went to court, etc... Why do these posters think they are the arbiter of justice?


Even more-so in the child rearing fora. Someone asks a simple question. Then gets completely reamed about how they are a terrible parent for even considering XYZ.

Your posts exhibit atrocious grammar.

Exhibit A ^^^^

Also, pp is off-topic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Just a curious question to OP: do you not find most women in the DC area to be quite rude in person, as well? Many of them are fairly monstrous in person.

Not OP. But yes, I think people in this area are pretty terrible. We have tried to leave several times but our jobs only exist here. Our kids are adamant about not staying here.

I feel this way too and I've lived here for nearly 20 years. I am sometimes shocked by how rude and judgmental people are. Or just lacking in basic courtesy. Like something I've noticed is common is that people here really struggle with how to handle basic interactions with someone you know but not well. So much weird behavior. You just smile and say hello, maybe exchange a banal pleasantry or two, and then move on. But people here seem to really struggle with this. I have met people who are openly hostile when someone they know says hello to them at the playground or on the street. And I'll say "oh, did you not know them?" and they'll be like "it's some family from school, I can't remember their names."

You don't even have to remember their names. You can just say hello and be pleasant. You can smile and compliment their kid or say "such a great day for a walk -- enjoy!" Or whatever. But so many people here will act cold and rude simply because you are not their BEST friend. It's because they feel awkward. But you don't have to be awkward. You just need to think through some basic people skills and try a tiny bit, and then this stuff will be normal and and no big deal.

I've heard that Silicon Valley (where I lived for a time) has a lot of behavior like this because there is a high percentage of people there on the spectrum or with social issues. But DC is worse, IMO. And it's sort of inexplicable to me because out there I'd meet someone with few social skills and they'd turn out to be a coder or a finance person who deals in numbers all day. Here I'll meet people who are insanely rude with limited social skills and then I'll find out they work in fundraising for a non-profit or something. What?! How. This place is so weird.

Ha ha, totally agree with this. Or if you're trying to get past someone in the grocery store and say excuse me, they just stare straight ahead without acknowledging your presence like they're terrified something else is going to happen, instead of saying, "I'm sorry, can you get by?" Crazies.

It didn't used to be like this. It used to be normal around here. Really.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Just a curious question to OP: do you not find most women in the DC area to be quite rude in person, as well? Many of them are fairly monstrous in person.

Not OP. But yes, I think people in this area are pretty terrible. We have tried to leave several times but our jobs only exist here. Our kids are adamant about not staying here.

I feel this way too and I've lived here for nearly 20 years. I am sometimes shocked by how rude and judgmental people are. Or just lacking in basic courtesy. Like something I've noticed is common is that people here really struggle with how to handle basic interactions with someone you know but not well. So much weird behavior. You just smile and say hello, maybe exchange a banal pleasantry or two, and then move on. But people here seem to really struggle with this. I have met people who are openly hostile when someone they know says hello to them at the playground or on the street. And I'll say "oh, did you not know them?" and they'll be like "it's some family from school, I can't remember their names."

You don't even have to remember their names. You can just say hello and be pleasant. You can smile and compliment their kid or say "such a great day for a walk -- enjoy!" Or whatever. But so many people here will act cold and rude simply because you are not their BEST friend. It's because they feel awkward. But you don't have to be awkward. You just need to think through some basic people skills and try a tiny bit, and then this stuff will be normal and and no big deal.

I've heard that Silicon Valley (where I lived for a time) has a lot of behavior like this because there is a high percentage of people there on the spectrum or with social issues. But DC is worse, IMO. And it's sort of inexplicable to me because out there I'd meet someone with few social skills and they'd turn out to be a coder or a finance person who deals in numbers all day. Here I'll meet people who are insanely rude with limited social skills and then I'll find out they work in fundraising for a non-profit or something. What?! How. This place is so weird.

I have lived in a NE neighborhood for 15 years. 15 years ago all the neighbors knew each other. We said hi, would stop and chat if you are out on the stoop. Etc. we always say hi to people. I can unequivocally say that it is the young, white women who are moving to my neighborhood who never say hello, never look up from their phones, walk their dogs on these long leashes so you have to get out of their way. Everyone else is friendly and nice. I don’t know if they’re scared of strangers or DC or what, but they’re just SO rude.

Pretty sure DCUM is chalk full of white women (though maybe not young). So my guess is they’re awful in real life too.

[Anonymous]

It’s true, it used to be normal here! Lots of intense strivers and aggressive drivers, sure, but otherwise pretty normal. I don’t know exactly what happened or when. I think things were broken before COVID. I noticed changes in the early 2000s with the influx of money under Bush, but nothing like the rudeness and hostility we have now.

But then other places outside DC are much ruder as well. We are turning into a country of angry, mean people.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:It’s true, it used to be normal here! Lots of intense strivers and aggressive drivers, sure, but otherwise pretty normal. I don’t know exactly what happened or when. I think things were broken before COVID. I noticed changes in the early 2000s with the influx of money under Bush, but nothing like the rudeness and hostility we have now.

But then other places outside DC are much ruder as well. We are turning into a country of angry, mean people.

I am not convinced it was ever “normal” around here (ha ha).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I actually think the anonymity of this board and the negativity permitted is one of DCUM's assets. You get straight answers, no BS. If you're being ridiculous, people will tell you so. No one will do that in real life.

+1

Agree. First, when DCUM is near unanimous, it is usually right--wisdom of crowds and all. Second, I agree that the helpful thing is to get unfiltered responses. There are a number of repetitive and hateful trolls, yes - but more than their meanness, I object to their obvious insincerity: they are just trying to rile folks up. And it means that DCUM then is not an accurate cross-section of random (even deplorable) human thought.... Finally, I have been on this d@mn website for almost a decade & have gotten a ton of good advice. There was only one truly awful (and dangerously wrong) response I have received--about my DC's medical condition no less!--and although I don't think I posted anything in response, that poster actually came back and spontaneously apologized. So I don't know, is DCUM really worse than IRL humanity?

[Anonymous]

Because I cant' tell l people IRL/straight to their face that I think they are a complete idiot so I tell people here what I really think of them.

[Anonymous]

The current heat wave isn’t helping!