Do you expect an appetizer/small nibble when you're invited for dinner?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only day I skip an appetizer is Thanksgiving. The dinner food is the star. If you don’t offer a drink and app, does everyone sit down to dinner within 15 minutes of arrival? Potentially, your guests could be fed and gone within the hour. I prefer an evening in my home to move a little slower.

Do you have overnight guests? Or if people are arriving, how long do you wait before you serve dinner?

When my ILs host, we are overnight guests, and they don’t serve anything between breakfast (one muffin and one hard-boiled egg each) and don’t serve anything until 3 or 4 p.m. It’s awful.

When we host, we have a little breakfast, then set up appetizers as lunch around lunchtime; people can eat as much or as little as they want. Then we eat a proper dinner at 5 p.m.

+1 Thanksgiving is actually the one time when I do two or three rounds of appetizers. I don't do a big lunch and dinner is served at 3. People start arriving at noon and that's the first round of appetizers. Another round goes out at 1 or so, and the final round at 2. Basically by 2 there is enough of an appetizer bar that it makes up for no big lunch. But Thanksgiving is a day of feasting and everyone is so busy, playing out in the yard or running around in the house, that it isn't like they aren't working off the calories.

I'm confused -- so there IS a "not big" lunch in addition to three rounds of appetizers and dinner at 3? When do you serve this not-big lunch, 10am?

Sigh. Perhaps she serves an "early" dinner? That's what we do. Our regular dinnertime is 7:30 pm but on Thanksgiving it is at 3. I don't get your condescension. Are you normally so rude? DP.

NP. You don’t get to start a post with a condescending and rude “sigh” and then accuse another poster of being condescending and rude.

LOL. Guess I struck a nerve. Whatever. You obviously are either in a foul mood or you're just normally a disagreeable person. You're not worth responding to anymore. Tootaloo.

[Anonymous]

I'm not an appetizer fan myself so I usually don't serve them, but I remember one time when my friends arrived super hungry and I was still cooking. I didn't have anything elegant to offer them until my fancier meal was ready and it was awkward. They seem to have forgiven me, but I have since taken note that when they put out snacks before dinners they host they really eat the snacks. I'd rather save room...

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not an appetizer fan myself so I usually don't serve them, but I remember one time when my friends arrived super hungry and I was still cooking. I didn't have anything elegant to offer them until my fancier meal was ready and it was awkward. They seem to have forgiven me, but I have since taken note that when they put out snacks before dinners they host they really eat the snacks. I'd rather save room...

Your body feels the way it feels. I love how MIL tells us to “save room” for Thanksgiving (which is inevitably late) and starves her overnight guests all day. Telling hangry is not a great way to approach a festive table. Plus, your food might not be as good as you think it is. Growing up, my aunt was a terrible cook, so thank goodness for the cashews, good cheese and decent desserts she set out.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only day I skip an appetizer is Thanksgiving. The dinner food is the star. If you don’t offer a drink and app, does everyone sit down to dinner within 15 minutes of arrival? Potentially, your guests could be fed and gone within the hour. I prefer an evening in my home to move a little slower.

Do you have overnight guests? Or if people are arriving, how long do you wait before you serve dinner?

When my ILs host, we are overnight guests, and they don’t serve anything between breakfast (one muffin and one hard-boiled egg each) and don’t serve anything until 3 or 4 p.m. It’s awful.

When we host, we have a little breakfast, then set up appetizers as lunch around lunchtime; people can eat as much or as little as they want. Then we eat a proper dinner at 5 p.m.

+1 Thanksgiving is actually the one time when I do two or three rounds of appetizers. I don't do a big lunch and dinner is served at 3. People start arriving at noon and that's the first round of appetizers. Another round goes out at 1 or so, and the final round at 2. Basically by 2 there is enough of an appetizer bar that it makes up for no big lunch. But Thanksgiving is a day of feasting and everyone is so busy, playing out in the yard or running around in the house, that it isn't like they aren't working off the calories.

I'm confused -- so there IS a "not big" lunch in addition to three rounds of appetizers and dinner at 3? When do you serve this not-big lunch, 10am?

Sigh. Perhaps she serves an "early" dinner? That's what we do. Our regular dinnertime is 7:30 pm but on Thanksgiving it is at 3. I don't get your condescension. Are you normally so rude? DP.

NP. You don’t get to start a post with a condescending and rude “sigh” and then accuse another poster of being condescending and rude.

LOL. Guess I struck a nerve. Whatever. You obviously are either in a foul mood or you're just normally a disagreeable person. You're not worth responding to anymore. Tootaloo.

I am not the poster you responded to. “NP” means “new poster.” My point stands that you are just as immature, condescending and rude as the person you were attempting to call out. Your last post above is straight from the sulky teen playbook.

[Anonymous]

Yes. If it's a proper dinner party of course. If it's a pizza party/carryout, I'll toss out what t I have on hand.

I normally do all the meal prep and hire a sous chef to do thr plating and fi al touches so I can enjoy. It's usually a plated salad, appetizer, and then dinner and dessert.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The only day I skip an appetizer is Thanksgiving. The dinner food is the star. If you don’t offer a drink and app, does everyone sit down to dinner within 15 minutes of arrival? Potentially, your guests could be fed and gone within the hour. I prefer an evening in my home to move a little slower.

Do you have overnight guests? Or if people are arriving, how long do you wait before you serve dinner?

When my ILs host, we are overnight guests, and they don’t serve anything between breakfast (one muffin and one hard-boiled egg each) and don’t serve anything until 3 or 4 p.m. It’s awful.

When we host, we have a little breakfast, then set up appetizers as lunch around lunchtime; people can eat as much or as little as they want. Then we eat a proper dinner at 5 p.m.

+1 Thanksgiving is actually the one time when I do two or three rounds of appetizers. I don't do a big lunch and dinner is served at 3. People start arriving at noon and that's the first round of appetizers. Another round goes out at 1 or so, and the final round at 2. Basically by 2 there is enough of an appetizer bar that it makes up for no big lunch. But Thanksgiving is a day of feasting and everyone is so busy, playing out in the yard or running around in the house, that it isn't like they aren't working off the calories.

I'm confused -- so there IS a "not big" lunch in addition to three rounds of appetizers and dinner at 3? When do you serve this not-big lunch, 10am?

Sigh. Perhaps she serves an "early" dinner? That's what we do. Our regular dinnertime is 7:30 pm but on Thanksgiving it is at 3. I don't get your condescension. Are you normally so rude? DP.

NP. You don’t get to start a post with a condescending and rude “sigh” and then accuse another poster of being condescending and rude.

LOL. Guess I struck a nerve. Whatever. You obviously are either in a foul mood or you're just normally a disagreeable person. You're not worth responding to anymore. Tootaloo.

I am not the poster you responded to. “NP” means “new poster.” My point stands that you are just as immature, condescending and rude as the person you were attempting to call out. Your last post above is straight from the sulky teen playbook.

Jeez, babe. Pull the pole out of your rectum.

~A different NP.

[Anonymous]

Why bother hosting if you are going to treat it like a basic family weeknight meal?

Your sister is the better hostess.

[Anonymous]

expect, no. appreciate, yes. necessary, absolutely not.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:OMG. Can everyone stop saying "nibbles"? There is already a word for this, and it's appetizer. Snack or hors d'oeuvres will also do.

No. An appetizer can be a starter, whereas a nibble is nuts or some such.

Nibble is such a grotesque word.

[Anonymous]

The correct answer is serve appetizers. Can be grapes and cheese and crackers or olives and crudities or really anything. But nobody likes to drink wine without having the option of an appetizer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
OP here. A small nibble is fine but the big platters of cheese don't make sense to me. It's a lot of rich food and before a full meal so by the time the meal comes many people have filled up on cheese.

And sometimes, the cheese platters are better than the main course.....

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I'm not an appetizer fan myself so I usually don't serve them, but I remember one time when my friends arrived super hungry and I was still cooking. I didn't have anything elegant to offer them until my fancier meal was ready and it was awkward. They seem to have forgiven me, but I have since taken note that when they put out snacks before dinners they host they really eat the snacks. I'd rather save room...

When you invite people to dinner, it’s not about your preferences.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP here. A small nibble is fine but the big platters of cheese don't make sense to me. It's a lot of rich food and before a full meal so by the time the meal comes many people have filled up on cheese.

And sometimes, the cheese platters are better than the main course.....

And people can make their own decisions about whether to fill up on cheese, or not. It’s so strange to try to control that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:
OP here. A small nibble is fine but the big platters of cheese don't make sense to me. It's a lot of rich food and before a full meal so by the time the meal comes many people have filled up on cheese.

And sometimes, the cheese platters are better than the main course.....

And people can make their own decisions about whether to fill up on cheese, or not. It’s so strange to try to control that.

It is strange to me that OP is so stuck in thinking that she's correct when the consensus here has been otherwise. So your statement about control resonates. She really must have some control issues. I wonder if she has an eating disorder?

[Anonymous]

No but I'm European and we don't really snack.