Wife lashes out at everyone

Anonymous
Today my wife sends an email to our apartment leasing office asking them why they can't understand her previous two emails. She actually wrote something like," I don't know why it's so hard to understand? I've asked for the paint color twice." Apparently she had asked for the paint color in two separate emails and they haven't given her an answer. They told her not to worry about paint touch up because unless we have damaged the walls we won't be charged when we move. And another example- about a week ago she flips out because the server at a restaurant did not get to our table until 20 minutes after we were seated. He was helping tables that were seated after her. I think he was waiting until I arrived but anyway she was beyond pissed about it because our toddler was hungry. The manager ended up paying for our bill and this was a fancy restaurant! How can I get my wife to chill out? She's always stressed.
Anonymous
Get ready for all of the “feminists” here to shame you for not stepping up and being “the man.”
Anonymous

She should have her thyroid checked out by a simple blood test. Elevated thyroid hormone levels increase irritability, blood pressure and heart rate, and if you go into thyroid storm, can be fatal.

Anonymous
I'd be pissed about the restaurant thing too. Did she specifically say you were coming but she wants to order right away for the baby? Sometimes you have to make that clear. If she did, then she's right to be mad. Cranky babies/toddlers make everyone around them cranky...especially when you're already hungry/hangry yourself.

No advice on the first one, but honestly, if I had emailed twice about something and been ignored, I might get testy too.

Sorry OP, these aren't great examples of her lashing out irrationally.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Get ready for all of the “feminists” here to shame you for not stepping up and being “the man.”


How was I supposed to be the man in these situations? I didn't know what happened until after the fact. I walked into the restaurant after she complained to the manager and I read the email after she responded. She sent the email from my email address BTW. We communicate with the leasing office though my account so now they must think I am a dick.

Anonymous
Sorry, she is right in both cases. Apartment Building companies are well known for charging people for minor things. Hungry toddler should not have to wait for food because you are at a fancy restaurant and it takes them 20+ minuets to come around.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sorry, she is right in both cases. Apartment Building companies are well known for charging people for minor things. Hungry toddler should not have to wait for food because you are at a fancy restaurant and it takes them 20+ minuets to come around.


+1
Anonymous
Did I miss it? When was your wife lashing out? The examples you gave seem like reasonable responses to situations.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Did I miss it? When was your wife lashing out? The examples you gave seem like reasonable responses to situations.


Having your meal comped when the wait staff is trained to have the entire party present before ordering is not reasonable.
Anonymous
May be she needs a good F$&@. That does for my wife. She gets testy, I get lucky, life gets awesome!!
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I'd be pissed about the restaurant thing too. Did she specifically say you were coming but she wants to order right away for the baby? Sometimes you have to make that clear. If she did, then she's right to be mad. Cranky babies/toddlers make everyone around them cranky...especially when you're already hungry/hangry yourself.

No advice on the first one, but honestly, if I had emailed twice about something and been ignored, I might get testy too.

Sorry OP, these aren't great examples of her lashing out irrationally.


I agree with this. I would’ve had the exact same reaction.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Sorry, she is right in both cases. Apartment Building companies are well known for charging people for minor things. Hungry toddler should not have to wait for food because you are at a fancy restaurant and it takes them 20+ minuets to come around.


+1


But you don't need to lash out about it. You can be polite, you know.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:Did I miss it? When was your wife lashing out? The examples you gave seem like reasonable responses to situations.


Having your meal comped when the wait staff is trained to have the entire party present before ordering is not reasonable.

The fact that they were actually seated without you is kind of amazing.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Sorry, she is right in both cases. Apartment Building companies are well known for charging people for minor things. Hungry toddler should not have to wait for food because you are at a fancy restaurant and it takes them 20+ minuets to come around.


Hungry toddler shouldn’t be taken to fancy restaurant, when most fancy restaurants don’t rush service and meals.
Anonymous
OP, your wife is more assertive than you are. That's perfectly fine.

I'm in a similar marriage. I find my husband overly compliant sometimes when people like apartment owners and waiters do not treat him fairly. You might consider asking yourself whether you want to wait while those who come after you are served first. But perhaps you do not take care of your hungry baby? That makes life easier, doesn't eat? Ditto the painting situation. I'm betting you don't have to take care of that.

It seems like it's much easier for my husband to be patient and compliant and nice when I'm playing "bad cop." Then he can ask why I'm so bitchy when I finally make sure our meal comes and it's the right order.
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