Would you be upset if your kid was served mocktails & got a makeover at a party?
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Anonymous
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DD (12) came home today from a 13th bday sleepover with pink hair, her nails done, slept in makeup, and gushing about the fun mocktails they were served.
The invite didn’t list any of these things. It listed that they were going to dinner, to see Jurassic World (was fine with) and then getting Duck Donuts. When I dropped her off yesterday morning and spoke with the bday girl’s mom, she said the plan was to spend most of the day playing in their backyard pool and doing fun girlie things like makeovers. I took that to mean the girls doing each other’s nails, hair, and maybe some make up. I didn’t realize the girls’s aunt, who is a professional that you can hire to do your hair and makeup before your wedding, was coming to offer her services. There was also a professional nail person or team there. I think the friend’s mom could tell I wasn’t pleased with the pink hair by the face I made when i picked my DD up. She quickly let me know it was 1 day spray in dye that would wash right out and then she texted me later this evening to double check that it had washed out after she showered (it did). None of the other moms I’ve talked to seem to care. Am I really making a big deal of nothing? It seems irresponsible to serve mocktails and glamorize drinking. And to not even ask parental permission about the makeover peeves me. DD is already talking about getting more of the 1 day hair dye and the make up she wants to buy and now I get to be the bad mom who says no. |
Anonymous
| Get a grip lady! All of this is fine. Glad she had fun. |
Anonymous
| You stressed the other mom out with your judgy attitude. Girls had fun get over it. |
Anonymous
| Simply tell her that hair dye and make up are for special occasions at her age. |
Anonymous
| Sounds fun. And, FINE! |
Anonymous
| Christ lady lighten up. |
Anonymous
| Nope. 13 isn't 6. |
Anonymous
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Make up and temporary hair dye? No biggie.
Mocktails at a 13 year old's party? Were they mixed in shakers and served in cocktail glasses? That would definitely bother me. Frozen virgin pina coladas or strawberry daiquiris served in a plastic cup with a fun straw similar to a starbucks frappachino or a smoothie at a restaurant? Not a big deal. I am generally conservative but am fine with adult drinking, host parties with alcohol and am not anti fun drinks for kids. |
Anonymous
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Uh. Wouldn't even bat an eyelash over this. Ok, I might have been startled by the pink hair, but I would have been fine once I knew it would wash out. And I would be delighted to have an opportunity to say to my daughter in a few more years, "You know, if you have friends who are drinking and want you to drink too, you can always pour a glass of club soda and put a lime in it. It will look just like a cocktail - remember that mocktail party? You could make something like that too if you don't feel comfortable saying you don't want to drink." I have a teen and we talk about stuff like this all the time.
I would love to know the aunt's contact info. I would hire her for a spa day for friends at my house. |
Anonymous
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No, this wouldn't bother me.
You were told they'd do makeovers and you understood that would include makeup. So you were OK with the idea of makeup and nail polish; you just think that it was just too much (bringing in professionals) and that the girls slept in their makeup. A little irresponsiblie sleep habits is part of a sleepover at this age -- no one is going to send 13 year olds up and check to be sure they washed their face and brushed their teeth. The hair dye was temporary too. No big deal. So your only real quarrel is about the mocktails. If you disapprove of drinking or glamorizing drinking that is valid, but not worth getting upset about. |
Anonymous
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I have daughters and wouldn't have been upset at all. It sounds like they had a great time.
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Anonymous
| Sounds like a blast 80s style. Great idea for a 13th. |
Anonymous
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Anonymous
Virgin frozen margaritas and pina coladas and a drink the bday girl created. All were frozen and served in plastic glasses (like plastic margarita and plastic colada glasses). I think the mocktails are really what angered me most. I just see it as glamorizing drinking which I don’t believe in. There’s alcoholism on my side of the family so we’ve always discussed alcohol with them and the seriousness of it. Most of this evening was spent talking about drinking and alcohol because she’s just absolutely enthralled with the mocktails. |
Anonymous
| You are projecting on all the mocktails stuff. |