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Would you let a teenage boy babysit your preschool girl?
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Anonymous
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The family next door is wonderful – two great parents and three kind, smart, well-adjusted kids. Their oldest daughter used to babysit for us but she went away to college this Fall. We loved having her as a babysitter, not only because she was great with our 2 yo son and 4 yo daughter, but her parents were right next door in case of emergency.
Now that she’s in college I was thinking of asking her 17 year old brother if he would be interested in babysitting. We know him pretty well and by all accounts he’s a real nice kid. But for some reason I feel a little uncomfortable if say my daughter had an accident and he had to change her clothes. Would you feel comfortable letting a teenage boy babysit your preschool girl? |
Anonymous
| No. |
Anonymous
| Yes. |
Anonymous
| My just turned 20 yr old neighbor babysits my preschool aged son sometimes. I know him well and feel comfortable w/ the arrangement. But don't do it if it makes you feel uneasy. |
Anonymous
| If I knew him/his family, yes. |
Anonymous
| No, but I wouldn't let a teenage girl babysit my preschool girl, either. We don't know any teenagers well enough to have that kind of sitter relationship. If you have a great relationship with the family and are comfortable with the arrangement, I don't think gender should matter. |
Anonymous
| To the poster that flat out said "NO" with no other explanation - that just makes me sad. I have a DS who is kind and sweet and gentle (although not old enough to babysit yet) and it breaks my heart that some other parent out there thinks just because he is male, he is somehow bad or more prone to abuse a female. Sad, sad. |
Anonymous
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No, never. (I'm resisting saying "are you crazy??!!") No matter how sweet. No matter the circumstances. Even your benign example of him having to change your daughter's clothes (if that ever needed to happen) sets off alarm bells. How could you put her in that circumstance?
Hormones are weird, very powerful things. I remember having weird feelings when I was a teenage babysitter, and I was a female! It was just being around soft, sweet little kids who were dependent on me. Not like pedophiliac feelings, but just weird. I know that sounds f*cked up, but that's my point exactly. I just love my child too much to ever risk ANYTHING happening, even the most remote risk. If something bad happened, it would change her life forever. For one babysitting job! Incidentally, I would never leave my male OR female child with a teenage boy, and that's also because 17-year old boys aren't known for particularly good judgment even in totally normal circumstances. Also, next door means nothing without an adult in the room. I seriously hope you will reconsider this idea. Your daughter needs your utmost protection, not just a convenient babysitter, no matter how nice the boy is. |
Anonymous
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You just have to trust your instinct. We don't know this kid.
If it were me, I'd say no. I had a teenaged boy as a babysitter when I was about four, and some mild (though not scarring) creepiness ensued. I'm a little wary. I'm sure he was in the minority. In fact, I have a vague impression that there were other male babysitters, but I only really remember that one. |
Anonymous
| No, never. please don't do it. Who would ever leave their kid with a crazy teen? Of course he's nice. Don't be cheap when it comes to the well being of your child. |
Anonymous
Don't worry. There are lots of others who don't think that way. I had both male and female babysitters as a child. I would have no problem with my daughter having the same. |
Anonymous
| As long as I knew the boy well, I'd trust a teenage boy babysitter. How are we ever going to expect our husbands to pitch in more with childcare if they are told from an early age that there is something creepy or just not right with a male babysitting a girl...? Please, not every man out there is a pedophile. And it is insulting to me, as a mother, a daughter, a wife, just a plain old human, to hear people imply that. |
Anonymous
| Can DD dress herself if the situation called for it? My 4 yo won't even let me help her get dressed. |
Anonymous
I didn't give a reason because I know my reason is too fucked up - I was raped by a 11 y. old boy when I was 8. I know in his mind he wasn't raping me and probably didn’t' even know what it meant, was just being curious and I was a easy prey at the time. I also know lots of sweet, darling little boy that I can't imagine doing this kind of stuff EVER, but at the same time what happened to me decades ago tainted my views on the subject - for my own daughter at least. |
Anonymous
So by this reasoning you shouldn't be leaving your child with teen girls, fathers, grandfathers or any other male for that matter. Right? My teen watches his little brother all the time. It is very sad that people think this way. Very sad. |