What do you consider a tiger Mom?

[Anonymous]

I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do.

[Anonymous]

Expecting perfect grades is pretty Tiger Mom.

But to me the question is one of control. What would you do if your child wanted to quit violin and play guitar? If they wanted to do the school play instead of math team? And when the time comes, if they want to become a teacher or a physical therapist instead of an engineer or a doctor? If you are planning on making those choices for them then yes I'd say you're a Tiger Mom.

[Anonymous]

I’m not Asian but I want my kids to have common sense, self-sufficiency, and practicality. In addition to working hard, being inclusive and nice, and striving to get good grades/mastery of materials.

If my kids think making pottery all day or theatrics will pay the bills, I hope that’s as a hobby not full time endeavor. If they are in a school that encourages non-productive careers I don’t think we’d enjoy it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do.

This is pretty common from any race involved parents.
The other common type of parents in DC are the ones that let the kids call all the shots, sometimes until age 30-40.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Expecting perfect grades is pretty Tiger Mom.

But to me the question is one of control. What would you do if your child wanted to quit violin and play guitar? If they wanted to do the school play instead of math team? And when the time comes, if they want to become a teacher or a physical therapist instead of an engineer or a doctor? If you are planning on making those choices for them then yes I'd say you're a Tiger Mom.

Your examples aren't that extreme, but if say my child wants to major in something that has little chance of resulting in a job, I'm not necessarily paying for them to get that major. I wouldn't stand in their way though.

[Anonymous]

Have you read the book? I really enjoyed it. My parents weren't Asian, but they were immigrants, and I related a lot to her perspective and some (not all!) of her expectations as a parent.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/9160695-battle-hymn-of-the-tiger-mother

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do.

I try not to be a tiger mom. But I haven’t read the book. It’s on my list of books to read because I hear it’s interesting and I’m sure there are good things I could learn from it.

I’ll say similar to what you said above but about me. I’m Caucasian American. I studied hard and ivy educated. DH probably didn’t study as hard as me but he paid for himself to go to college (state flagship). We both have graduate degrees. We want our kids to succeed academically. Love of learning is one of our top priorities. I don’t make them do extra math or reading, especially not on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. My younger kids are in K and preschool respectively and we will see what happens with AAP. I would like them to have more time to play. Kids play sports. They have play dates.
I don’t expect perfect grades.

[Anonymous]

I consider myself a Tiger Parent, just like my white European mother.

I expect and get straight As, even for my child with severe ADHD and a host of learning disabilities. To get him to that point, *we* worked extremely hard together (from speech/physical therapy to learning to write to extra practice in math). He has built extraordinary resilience and work ethic because he has worked his way up.

I expect my kids to be interested in history and current events, love good literature and read voraciously, be fluent in writing and culture in our native tongue, write beautiful cursive, sing and play an instrument well (or study music theory for the one with a motor disability). These things are non-negotiable.

I encourage and nurture whatever else they want to do: for one of them, it's coding, for the other, it's horses and animals in general.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do.

This is pretty common from any race involved parents.
The other common type of parents in DC are the ones that let the kids call all the shots, sometimes until age 30-40.

Who exactly should be calling the shots in the life of a 30 or 40 year old? I am 42 and I like to believe I am currently calling my own shots.

[Anonymous]

I think good for you. I'm much more free range (lazy) but I admire your discipline. Your children will succeed.

Don't listen to jealous haters.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I consider myself a Tiger Parent, just like my white European mother.

I expect and get straight As, even for my child with severe ADHD and a host of learning disabilities. To get him to that point, *we* worked extremely hard together (from speech/physical therapy to learning to write to extra practice in math). He has built extraordinary resilience and work ethic because he has worked his way up.

I expect my kids to be interested in history and current events, love good literature and read voraciously, be fluent in writing and culture in our native tongue, write beautiful cursive, sing and play an instrument well (or study music theory for the one with a motor disability). These things are non-negotiable.

I encourage and nurture whatever else they want to do: for one of them, it's coding, for the other, it's horses and animals in general.

Yes, yes you are.

[Anonymous]

To the OP, how would you react if your child scored an 88 on a test? A 75? How bad do you freak out? I think that is the difference that would make you a tiger Mom. Some can’t handle anything below an A for any reason.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

[/b]I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do[b].

It depends on the child. Count your blessings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I hear this term often on these boards.

I’m Asian-American. DH and I studied hard and ivy educated. We want our kids to also succeed academically. School is always our first priority. I do make them do a little extra math and reading, even on weekends. Older kid is in AAP. Second kid should also get in. Kids play plenty. Kids play sports. They have play dates.

Would I be considered a tiger Mom?

I do expect perfect grades and that is pretty damn easy to do.

Yes, most would consider you a tiger mom. Not that, I think there's anything wrong with it. I'm one myself.

[Anonymous]

Yes troll, I think you know the definition.