Will my SA mother in law be offended?

[Anonymous]

Husband is Indian. I am using a pink saree my MIL gave me as wall art. It's looks very similar to the picture in the link I have attached. MIL is visiting soon. My husband has no idea if it will offend her.

https://www.brownstoner.com/real-estate-market/the-insider-uber-stylish-townhouse-in-prospect-heights/?accordion=the-insider

[Anonymous]

I have no idea but that looks beautiful OP.

[Anonymous]

Do you ever wear saris?

I'm SA and I think it's cool that you are at least using it, but yeah she's probably going to be offended if she bought it for you with the intention to wear and then you hung it up on your wall. I mean how would you feel if you gave your DIL a dress and she hung it up on the wall as decor? That's literally what you're doing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Do you ever wear saris?

I'm SA and I think it's cool that you are at least using it, but yeah she's probably going to be offended if she bought it for you with the intention to wear and then you hung it up on your wall. I mean how would you feel if you gave your DIL a dress and she hung it up on the wall as decor? That's literally what you're doing.

OP here. No I don't wear sarees. I don't know how to wrap it and there's never really an occasion that has came up to wear one anyway. My MIL lives abroad and I rarely see her. It's hard to say how I would feel if my DIL did this because my son is only 2. I am an interior designer so I don't think it would bother me. I see stuff like this a lot. I guess I am wondering if people in SA do this?

[Anonymous]

Replace it with a cheap sari while she visits?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you ever wear saris?

I'm SA and I think it's cool that you are at least using it, but yeah she's probably going to be offended if she bought it for you with the intention to wear and then you hung it up on your wall. I mean how would you feel if you gave your DIL a dress and she hung it up on the wall as decor? That's literally what you're doing.

OP here. No I don't wear sarees. I don't know how to wrap it and there's never really an occasion that has came up to wear one anyway. My MIL lives abroad and I rarely see her. It's hard to say how I would feel if my DIL did this because my son is only 2. I am an interior designer so I don't think it would bother me. I see stuff like this a lot. I guess I am wondering if people in SA do this?

PP here. If you rarely see her, just take it down while she's there, it's not worth the potential offense. How does your husband not know if this will offend his mom?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Do you ever wear saris?

I'm SA and I think it's cool that you are at least using it, but yeah she's probably going to be offended if she bought it for you with the intention to wear and then you hung it up on your wall. I mean how would you feel if you gave your DIL a dress and she hung it up on the wall as decor? That's literally what you're doing.

OP here. No I don't wear sarees. I don't know how to wrap it and there's never really an occasion that has came up to wear one anyway. My MIL lives abroad and I rarely see her. It's hard to say how I would feel if my DIL did this because my son is only 2. I am an interior designer so I don't think it would bother me. I see stuff like this a lot. I guess I am wondering if people in SA do this?

PP here. If you rarely see her, just take it down while she's there, it's not worth the potential offense. How does your husband not know if this will offend his mom?

My husband is very indirect. I asked him and he said he doesn't know.

[Anonymous]

Indian here. Honestly if she’s a typical Indian MIL, no matter what you do, you will offend her. But you might as well take it down for the visit to minimize the chances. She will of course take offense at something else you do or say, but why give her blatant ammunition?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Indian here. Honestly if she’s a typical Indian MIL, no matter what you do, you will offend her. But you might as well take it down for the visit to minimize the chances. She will of course take offense at something else you do or say, but why give her blatant ammunition?

Op here. My MIL is really sweet but she doesn't speak English. If I have offended her my husband has never said anything about it. Dh is very good about sparing my feelings.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Indian here. Honestly if she’s a typical Indian MIL, no matter what you do, you will offend her. But you might as well take it down for the visit to minimize the chances. She will of course take offense at something else you do or say, but why give her blatant ammunition?

Op here. My MIL is really sweet but she doesn't speak English. If I have offended her my husband has never said anything about it. Dh is very good about sparing my feelings.

Given this information, take it down. Your husband saying he “doesn’t know” if MIL will be offended pretty much means she will be. How do you not see that he’s trying not to offend you by telling you to take it down?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Husband is Indian. I am using a pink saree my MIL gave me as wall art. It's looks very similar to the picture in the link I have attached. MIL is visiting soon. My husband has no idea if it will offend her.

https://www.brownstoner.com/real-estate-market/the-insider-uber-stylish-townhouse-in-prospect-heights/?accordion=the-insider

Um, why is the twelve year old child dressed like that?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Indian here. Honestly if she’s a typical Indian MIL, no matter what you do, you will offend her. But you might as well take it down for the visit to minimize the chances. She will of course take offense at something else you do or say, but why give her blatant ammunition?

Op here. My MIL is really sweet but she doesn't speak English. If I have offended her my husband has never said anything about it. Dh is very good about sparing my feelings.

Given this information, take it down. Your husband saying he “doesn’t know” if MIL will be offended pretty much means she will be. How do you not see that he’s trying not to offend you by telling you to take it down?

Exactly.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Indian here. Honestly if she’s a typical Indian MIL, no matter what you do, you will offend her. But you might as well take it down for the visit to minimize the chances. She will of course take offense at something else you do or say, but why give her blatant ammunition?

Op here. My MIL is really sweet but she doesn't speak English. If I have offended her my husband has never said anything about it. Dh is very good about sparing my feelings.

Given this information, take it down. Your husband saying he “doesn’t know” if MIL will be offended pretty much means she will be. How do you not see that he’s trying not to offend you by telling you to take it down?

I'm not Indian but I'm guessing it's because he didn't tell her to take it down? It's not complicated.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Husband is Indian. I am using a pink saree my MIL gave me as wall art. It's looks very similar to the picture in the link I have attached. MIL is visiting soon. My husband has no idea if it will offend her.

https://www.brownstoner.com/real-estate-market/the-insider-uber-stylish-townhouse-in-prospect-heights/?accordion=the-insider

Um, why is the twelve year old child dressed like that?

She is 12?!?

[Anonymous]

Doesn’t seem like you care if it offends for MIL or not. Indian posters are telling you to take it down and you are still ambivalent. If you dhaf then why are you asking?

BTW I think it’s pretty crappy that you think it’s ok if her feelings are hurt as long as you don’t have to acknowledge it, since she doesn’t speak English and your DH doesn’t have the balls to stand up to you.