Freeloading swim team parents suck

[Anonymous]

Our pool says you can’t go to the end of year banquet unless your family has done their share of volunteering. Then as the end of the season closes in, the reps keep saying, we mean it, your child can’t go to the banquet/dance and get their certificate etc unless you did your jobs.

I’ve heard other pools take $200 from families and you get i back if and only if you do your share. The problem with that approach is that some families will just write that off and not do the jobs (see: swimming is a pretty affordable summer camp option).

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:
I’ve heard other pools take $200 from families and you get i back if and only if you do your share. The problem with that approach is that some families will just write that off and not do the jobs (see: swimming is a pretty affordable summer camp option).

Should it be higher? How high should it be for the parents who do chip in to say that the amount is fair and use the $$$ on gift cards or lower fees for normal season.

[Anonymous]

$200 is way too low. There are usually at least 7 volunteer times required BUT if each time includes a meet (timing, marshal, etc), that’s typically 4 hours. That’s just over $7/hr. It needs to be way higher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate timing- I suspect I have poor reflexes and am always worried about messing it up. Happy to work concessions though.

I love timing! I really do not like S&T - so unhappy when I have to DQ a little kid.

Love this about the range of volunteer jobs. Our reps always tell us there's something for everyone. I love S&T, hate timing and clerk of course. Have never tried concessions.

There really is. If parents hate the pressure of timing or S&T they can marshal. If they don't want to stand around in the sun they can do awards which literally involves putting stickers on ribbons. yet, there are still parents who chose to do absolutely nothing at every single meet.

Exactly! I posted up thread, but I love being clerk of course. I get to know the kids and other parents, stay busy, and can keep an eye on my kids. Standing or sitting for hours is no good for me physically, but the moving around associated with CoC works well.

I'll probably get certified for S&T once all of my kids are swimming, because it sounds interesting and I'm also good at letting kids and parents down easy if I have to DQ them. And I can handle parents who might protest

I do Stroke and Turn in NVSL and while I hate DQing a kid, they don't know it's me. I write the slip and talk about it with the ref and then it goes to the table and team ref. There's something wrong with how the team is run if you're ever approached by parents or coaches about your DQ call. Those questions are directed to the ref. After B meets, I will engage with parents of kids I know well to explain why their kid DQed or I'll talk to the coaches to explain exactly what I saw on one of our kids so they can work on fixing it. Most of the time, the coaches see it too and don't question it.

Good to know. I'm making assumptions based on having grown up here (MoCo, my kids swim for an MCSL team) and playing sports and seeing what the parents are like. Our team is pretty chill, but some of the others against we compete are... not.

As for issues around racism (I know, separate post), historically, yes, it's an issue, and I'm sure still is in many communities. We live in a racially/ethnically/SES diverse area, and our team reflects that.

I know we're not really mentioning specific pools here, but I was wondering about Wildwood Pool?

I was thinking about signing my kids up for thr first time next year, but I noticed that some of the parents (moms in particular) are really clique-y and kind of intense... especially mom's of the older kids.

They're always standing around huddled together at practices (and whenever they're at the pool really) and whispering.
I've noticed that it's uncomfortable for the other mom's who aren't included in the huddle... and as ​an introvert, that intimidates me.

One mom has two older boys on the team that are in the same grades and would swim in the same div. as mine and she is truly so fake.

Our kids LOVED swim team at our old pool before we moved, and this was our first summer at Wildwood (we moved midway through the season, so we couldn't sign them up this summer) but we went the whole summer at the pool, and it was obvious, they were pretty blatant.

Im very inclusive, and I don't want to NOT sign them up, just because I don't want to have to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's... but I really don't want to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's, lol.

Anyone here have any experience WITH the team or on the team?

Thank you in advance. ❤

[Anonymous]

* spent, not went.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Our pool says you can’t go to the end of year banquet unless your family has done their share of volunteering. Then as the end of the season closes in, the reps keep saying, we mean it, your child can’t go to the banquet/dance and get their certificate etc unless you did your jobs.

I’ve heard other pools take $200 from families and you get i back if and only if you do your share. The problem with that approach is that some families will just write that off and not do the jobs (see: swimming is a pretty affordable summer camp option).

That's dumb. A lot of people don't care about the banquet. Then people think, Oh, I don't care about going to the banquet so I don't have to volunteer.


I think you should take at least $1000 check. Its gotta be painful.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don't love volunteering for concessions so I just find other things to do. I'm an early riser so I typically do set up for home A meets. That job has a set end to it and I get to see my kids swim. My H likes to do clean up because then the kids just stay and swim when the pool opens.

We definitely financially support the concessions though. I am pretty sure my kids swim for the the sugar. They are young enough to think it is special to take their own money and pick out a treat they wouldn't normally have.

This is a lovely take!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate timing- I suspect I have poor reflexes and am always worried about messing it up. Happy to work concessions though.

I love timing! I really do not like S&T - so unhappy when I have to DQ a little kid.

Love this about the range of volunteer jobs. Our reps always tell us there's something for everyone. I love S&T, hate timing and clerk of course. Have never tried concessions.

There really is. If parents hate the pressure of timing or S&T they can marshal. If they don't want to stand around in the sun they can do awards which literally involves putting stickers on ribbons. yet, there are still parents who chose to do absolutely nothing at every single meet.

Exactly! I posted up thread, but I love being clerk of course. I get to know the kids and other parents, stay busy, and can keep an eye on my kids. Standing or sitting for hours is no good for me physically, but the moving around associated with CoC works well.

I'll probably get certified for S&T once all of my kids are swimming, because it sounds interesting and I'm also good at letting kids and parents down easy if I have to DQ them. And I can handle parents who might protest

I do Stroke and Turn in NVSL and while I hate DQing a kid, they don't know it's me. I write the slip and talk about it with the ref and then it goes to the table and team ref. There's something wrong with how the team is run if you're ever approached by parents or coaches about your DQ call. Those questions are directed to the ref. After B meets, I will engage with parents of kids I know well to explain why their kid DQed or I'll talk to the coaches to explain exactly what I saw on one of our kids so they can work on fixing it. Most of the time, the coaches see it too and don't question it.

Good to know. I'm making assumptions based on having grown up here (MoCo, my kids swim for an MCSL team) and playing sports and seeing what the parents are like. Our team is pretty chill, but some of the others against we compete are... not.

As for issues around racism (I know, separate post), historically, yes, it's an issue, and I'm sure still is in many communities. We live in a racially/ethnically/SES diverse area, and our team reflects that.

I know we're not really mentioning specific pools here, but I was wondering about Wildwood Pool?

I was thinking about signing my kids up for thr first time next year, but I noticed that some of the parents (moms in particular) are really clique-y and kind of intense... especially mom's of the older kids.

They're always standing around huddled together at practices (and whenever they're at the pool really) and whispering.
I've noticed that it's uncomfortable for the other mom's who aren't included in the huddle... and as ​an introvert, that intimidates me.

One mom has two older boys on the team that are in the same grades and would swim in the same div. as mine and she is truly so fake.

Our kids LOVED swim team at our old pool before we moved, and this was our first summer at Wildwood (we moved midway through the season, so we couldn't sign them up this summer) but we went the whole summer at the pool, and it was obvious, they were pretty blatant.

Im very inclusive, and I don't want to NOT sign them up, just because I don't want to have to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's... but I really don't want to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's, lol.

Anyone here have any experience WITH the team or on the team?

Thank you in advance. ❤

It depends on the pool. We switched pools this summer and its been a great experience. Warm, welcoming and really made us feel a part of the team. But, that can be pretty common.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate timing- I suspect I have poor reflexes and am always worried about messing it up. Happy to work concessions though.

I love timing! I really do not like S&T - so unhappy when I have to DQ a little kid.

Love this about the range of volunteer jobs. Our reps always tell us there's something for everyone. I love S&T, hate timing and clerk of course. Have never tried concessions.

There really is. If parents hate the pressure of timing or S&T they can marshal. If they don't want to stand around in the sun they can do awards which literally involves putting stickers on ribbons. yet, there are still parents who chose to do absolutely nothing at every single meet.

Exactly! I posted up thread, but I love being clerk of course. I get to know the kids and other parents, stay busy, and can keep an eye on my kids. Standing or sitting for hours is no good for me physically, but the moving around associated with CoC works well.

I'll probably get certified for S&T once all of my kids are swimming, because it sounds interesting and I'm also good at letting kids and parents down easy if I have to DQ them. And I can handle parents who might protest

I do Stroke and Turn in NVSL and while I hate DQing a kid, they don't know it's me. I write the slip and talk about it with the ref and then it goes to the table and team ref. There's something wrong with how the team is run if you're ever approached by parents or coaches about your DQ call. Those questions are directed to the ref. After B meets, I will engage with parents of kids I know well to explain why their kid DQed or I'll talk to the coaches to explain exactly what I saw on one of our kids so they can work on fixing it. Most of the time, the coaches see it too and don't question it.

Good to know. I'm making assumptions based on having grown up here (MoCo, my kids swim for an MCSL team) and playing sports and seeing what the parents are like. Our team is pretty chill, but some of the others against we compete are... not.

As for issues around racism (I know, separate post), historically, yes, it's an issue, and I'm sure still is in many communities. We live in a racially/ethnically/SES diverse area, and our team reflects that.

I know we're not really mentioning specific pools here, but I was wondering about Wildwood Pool?

I was thinking about signing my kids up for thr first time next year, but I noticed that some of the parents (moms in particular) are really clique-y and kind of intense... especially mom's of the older kids.

They're always standing around huddled together at practices (and whenever they're at the pool really) and whispering.
I've noticed that it's uncomfortable for the other mom's who aren't included in the huddle... and as ​an introvert, that intimidates me.

One mom has two older boys on the team that are in the same grades and would swim in the same div. as mine and she is truly so fake.

Our kids LOVED swim team at our old pool before we moved, and this was our first summer at Wildwood (we moved midway through the season, so we couldn't sign them up this summer) but we went the whole summer at the pool, and it was obvious, they were pretty blatant.

Im very inclusive, and I don't want to NOT sign them up, just because I don't want to have to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's... but I really don't want to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's, lol.

Anyone here have any experience WITH the team or on the team?

Thank you in advance. ❤

You have no idea what they are “whispering” about and yet you’ve labeled them clique-y, intense, huddling, whispering, etc. how do you know other moms are uncomfortable? You’re an introvert and new to the pool. If you can’t go up and talk to them, it will be difficult for you. We’ve belonged to our pool for years but we see lots of new people there. I don’t randomly go up to them and start talking to them unless we are at a meet and working together or working near each other. They weren’t whispering every time they engaged.

You sound super judgmental and make a lot of assumptions.

Email the social director or team reps and ask if they’d introduce you to some people.

[Anonymous]

Volunteer for something and build cred

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate timing- I suspect I have poor reflexes and am always worried about messing it up. Happy to work concessions though.

I love timing! I really do not like S&T - so unhappy when I have to DQ a little kid.

Love this about the range of volunteer jobs. Our reps always tell us there's something for everyone. I love S&T, hate timing and clerk of course. Have never tried concessions.

There really is. If parents hate the pressure of timing or S&T they can marshal. If they don't want to stand around in the sun they can do awards which literally involves putting stickers on ribbons. yet, there are still parents who chose to do absolutely nothing at every single meet.

Exactly! I posted up thread, but I love being clerk of course. I get to know the kids and other parents, stay busy, and can keep an eye on my kids. Standing or sitting for hours is no good for me physically, but the moving around associated with CoC works well.

I'll probably get certified for S&T once all of my kids are swimming, because it sounds interesting and I'm also good at letting kids and parents down easy if I have to DQ them. And I can handle parents who might protest

I do Stroke and Turn in NVSL and while I hate DQing a kid, they don't know it's me. I write the slip and talk about it with the ref and then it goes to the table and team ref. There's something wrong with how the team is run if you're ever approached by parents or coaches about your DQ call. Those questions are directed to the ref. After B meets, I will engage with parents of kids I know well to explain why their kid DQed or I'll talk to the coaches to explain exactly what I saw on one of our kids so they can work on fixing it. Most of the time, the coaches see it too and don't question it.

Good to know. I'm making assumptions based on having grown up here (MoCo, my kids swim for an MCSL team) and playing sports and seeing what the parents are like. Our team is pretty chill, but some of the others against we compete are... not.

As for issues around racism (I know, separate post), historically, yes, it's an issue, and I'm sure still is in many communities. We live in a racially/ethnically/SES diverse area, and our team reflects that.

I know we're not really mentioning specific pools here, but I was wondering about Wildwood Pool?

I was thinking about signing my kids up for thr first time next year, but I noticed that some of the parents (moms in particular) are really clique-y and kind of intense... especially mom's of the older kids.

They're always standing around huddled together at practices (and whenever they're at the pool really) and whispering.
I've noticed that it's uncomfortable for the other mom's who aren't included in the huddle... and as ​an introvert, that intimidates me.

One mom has two older boys on the team that are in the same grades and would swim in the same div. as mine and she is truly so fake.

Our kids LOVED swim team at our old pool before we moved, and this was our first summer at Wildwood (we moved midway through the season, so we couldn't sign them up this summer) but we went the whole summer at the pool, and it was obvious, they were pretty blatant.

Im very inclusive, and I don't want to NOT sign them up, just because I don't want to have to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's... but I really don't want to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's, lol.

Anyone here have any experience WITH the team or on the team?

Thank you in advance. ❤

You have no idea what they are “whispering” about and yet you’ve labeled them clique-y, intense, huddling, whispering, etc. how do you know other moms are uncomfortable? You’re an introvert and new to the pool. If you can’t go up and talk to them, it will be difficult for you. We’ve belonged to our pool for years but we see lots of new people there. I don’t randomly go up to them and start talking to them unless we are at a meet and working together or working near each other. They weren’t whispering every time they engaged.

You sound super judgmental and make a lot of assumptions.

Email the social director or team reps and ask if they’d introduce you to some people.

Strike a nerve? Aha!
Not the pp, but it's easy to tell when people are standing around gossiping. You don't have to be in the conversation to know the body language.
Sounds like you may be one of those women or else you wouldn't be so emotionally triggered by what they said.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I hate timing- I suspect I have poor reflexes and am always worried about messing it up. Happy to work concessions though.

I love timing! I really do not like S&T - so unhappy when I have to DQ a little kid.

Love this about the range of volunteer jobs. Our reps always tell us there's something for everyone. I love S&T, hate timing and clerk of course. Have never tried concessions.

There really is. If parents hate the pressure of timing or S&T they can marshal. If they don't want to stand around in the sun they can do awards which literally involves putting stickers on ribbons. yet, there are still parents who chose to do absolutely nothing at every single meet.

Exactly! I posted up thread, but I love being clerk of course. I get to know the kids and other parents, stay busy, and can keep an eye on my kids. Standing or sitting for hours is no good for me physically, but the moving around associated with CoC works well.

I'll probably get certified for S&T once all of my kids are swimming, because it sounds interesting and I'm also good at letting kids and parents down easy if I have to DQ them. And I can handle parents who might protest

I do Stroke and Turn in NVSL and while I hate DQing a kid, they don't know it's me. I write the slip and talk about it with the ref and then it goes to the table and team ref. There's something wrong with how the team is run if you're ever approached by parents or coaches about your DQ call. Those questions are directed to the ref. After B meets, I will engage with parents of kids I know well to explain why their kid DQed or I'll talk to the coaches to explain exactly what I saw on one of our kids so they can work on fixing it. Most of the time, the coaches see it too and don't question it.

Good to know. I'm making assumptions based on having grown up here (MoCo, my kids swim for an MCSL team) and playing sports and seeing what the parents are like. Our team is pretty chill, but some of the others against we compete are... not.

As for issues around racism (I know, separate post), historically, yes, it's an issue, and I'm sure still is in many communities. We live in a racially/ethnically/SES diverse area, and our team reflects that.

I know we're not really mentioning specific pools here, but I was wondering about Wildwood Pool?

I was thinking about signing my kids up for thr first time next year, but I noticed that some of the parents (moms in particular) are really clique-y and kind of intense... especially mom's of the older kids.

They're always standing around huddled together at practices (and whenever they're at the pool really) and whispering.
I've noticed that it's uncomfortable for the other mom's who aren't included in the huddle... and as ​an introvert, that intimidates me.

One mom has two older boys on the team that are in the same grades and would swim in the same div. as mine and she is truly so fake.

Our kids LOVED swim team at our old pool before we moved, and this was our first summer at Wildwood (we moved midway through the season, so we couldn't sign them up this summer) but we went the whole summer at the pool, and it was obvious, they were pretty blatant.

Im very inclusive, and I don't want to NOT sign them up, just because I don't want to have to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's... but I really don't want to deal with phoney, cliquey mom's, lol.

Anyone here have any experience WITH the team or on the team?

Thank you in advance. ❤

You have no idea what they are “whispering” about and yet you’ve labeled them clique-y, intense, huddling, whispering, etc. how do you know other moms are uncomfortable? You’re an introvert and new to the pool. If you can’t go up and talk to them, it will be difficult for you. We’ve belonged to our pool for years but we see lots of new people there. I don’t randomly go up to them and start talking to them unless we are at a meet and working together or working near each other. They weren’t whispering every time they engaged.

You sound super judgmental and make a lot of assumptions.

Email the social director or team reps and ask if they’d introduce you to some people.

Strike a nerve? Aha!
Not the pp, but it's easy to tell when people are standing around gossiping. You don't have to be in the conversation to know the body language.
Sounds like you may be one of those women or else you wouldn't be so emotionally triggered by what they said.

Nope. I’m an introvert. So I usually am reading or watching my kids…rarely engaging. Definitely not one of those people. But the last time I was in a group, one mom was whispering. It was about her terminally ill mom and she didn’t know how to tell her daughter who was swimming nearby. I also remember overhearing a whispered conversation at the pool this summer about a mom having her son evaluated for adhd. Makes me sad to think others are misjudging these women.

[Anonymous]

Wanted to post something positive (so rare on dcurbanmom lol)

I was volunteering as a timer at a club meet (a little different than summer swim I know) and the head official said to all of us, "I was officiating at the Olympic training site in Colorado and met the head of USA swimming, who used to be the head of USA soccer. And he said to me, 'You know, the parents who are involved with swimming are really amazing. In all my years of being involved in sports, I've never seen such a group of parents so willing to put in work on behalf of their kids. It's really amazing to watch."

I am sure the cynics out there will have something terrible to say about this, and I am not making a statement about soccer parents here- but I applaud all of you in any sport for volunteering. For those that don't, at the end of the day, you are missing out on a good experience both for yourself and your kids. And if you have a good excuse not to, I am *sorry* you are missing out.

Go ahead, bash away, as I know so many of you love to do, sigh.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Wanted to post something positive (so rare on dcurbanmom lol)

I was volunteering as a timer at a club meet (a little different than summer swim I know) and the head official said to all of us, "I was officiating at the Olympic training site in Colorado and met the head of USA swimming, who used to be the head of USA soccer. And he said to me, 'You know, the parents who are involved with swimming are really amazing. In all my years of being involved in sports, I've never seen such a group of parents so willing to put in work on behalf of their kids. It's really amazing to watch."

I am sure the cynics out there will have something terrible to say about this, and I am not making a statement about soccer parents here- but I applaud all of you in any sport for volunteering. For those that don't, at the end of the day, you are missing out on a good experience both for yourself and your kids. And if you have a good excuse not to, I am *sorry* you are missing out.

Go ahead, bash away, as I know so many of you love to do, sigh.

You just made me tear up. This summer that was our pool I had so many parents stepping up and wanting to help it was amaznig. And, it was every parent. From the well off work 80 hours onsite at a job, parents that do shft work and would show up after working all night, and parents that could not speak a word of English. It was beautiful.

[Anonymous]

I think a lot of people have positive experiences with volunteering and summer pools. The critics on a anonymous chat board are just louder, that’s all.