Husband's friends wife not friendly

[Anonymous]

Have any of you delt with a situation where your husband is friends with a guy (who is a nice person) but he's married to a woman that has no interest in being friends with you personally? She's not overtly rude, but just has made it very clear she has no interest in friendship with me even though our husbands are friends. An example being, I reached out to her and she ignored me. She doesn't discuss anything personal, she just let's her husband talk. It's a little awkward because we mostly hang out as a couple.

[Anonymous]

Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

[Anonymous]

She sounds like a weirdo with social issues. Start ignoring her completely.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Have any of you delt with a situation where your husband is friends with a guy (who is a nice person) but he's married to a woman that has no interest in being friends with you personally? She's not overtly rude, but just has made it very clear she has no interest in friendship with me even though our husbands are friends. An example being, I reached out to her and she ignored me. She doesn't discuss anything personal, she just let's her husband talk. It's a little awkward because we mostly hang out as a couple.

Sounds like hanging out as a couple is not going to be fun. You can either stop hanging out as a couple or suck it up. A lot of husbands find their wives friends spouses boring and/or dont like them. Dont push the issue of trying to be friends it is like the pathetic sight of seeing two wives trying to arrange "play dates" for husbands that clearly don't like each other.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

If you -literally- see your husband once per month I’m not sure why seeing any friends (his or yours) are on your radar during that time. Can’t he see his friend on your separate time? This doesn’t make any sense.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

You don’t live with your spouse? That’s messed up. Work on fixing that first. Forget about friends, you have bigger issues. Maybe the wife is aghast that you see your spouse once a MONTH. Maybe she thinks your are putting money before the relationship and that makes you not her type.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

If you -literally- see your husband once per month I’m not sure why seeing any friends (his or yours) are on your radar during that time. Can’t he see his friend on your separate time? This doesn’t make any sense.

OMG this

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

This.

I have a demanding career and young kids. I really don't have the luxury of time for new friendships. I'll be polite and friendly when I see you, but I won't gossip...and I'm not stupid enough to share personal info about me or my family that could potentially be shared with the other house fraus at school. When I see you at sporting events (where I spend my weekends), I'll say hello and quickly exchange small talk. But then I actually want to watch my kid play and chat with my husband and other children.

My husband is very social and friends with everybody. And that's great. But I'm more introverted and don't feel the need to chat all the time. That doesn't make me a weirdo or a bitch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

You don’t live with your spouse? That’s messed up. Work on fixing that first. Forget about friends, you have bigger issues. Maybe the wife is aghast that you see your spouse once a MONTH. Maybe she thinks your are putting money before the relationship and that makes you not her type.

We're all military, so it's common. She is with her husband at the moment but will most likely be stationed away from him for 3 years. So I guess she could think that but she will be in the same situation too. None of us live close, so we have to travel to see each other.

[Anonymous]

That's me. I don't click with DH's friend wife. Nothing is wrong, I just feel zero connection. I would gladly not join DH but he likes when I am with him. I like his friends, but not their wives.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Just be polite and don't expect anything. Why doesn't your DH just hang out with his friend on his own?

We don't usually do separate things because we have limited time to spend with each other. Plus I like his friend too. There is nothing terribly wrong about his wife, it just hurts when it feels like she rejects my friendship. I'm not looking for a BFF, but just having a better connection to her would make things easier.

You sound needy. You and DH should start doing separate things. Not every weekend but sometimes.
I have my own friends. I have no interest in a friendship with DH’s friend’s wives. Sure, when we invite them over I am nice and chat but I would NOT be building a friendship there.

I'm not needy, we live separately so we literally see each other once a month. Since we also have to now travel to see these friends, we'll have to see both of them too.

You don’t live with your spouse? That’s messed up. Work on fixing that first. Forget about friends, you have bigger issues. Maybe the wife is aghast that you see your spouse once a MONTH. Maybe she thinks your are putting money before the relationship and that makes you not her type.

We're all military, so it's common. She is with her husband at the moment but will most likely be stationed away from him for 3 years. So I guess she could think that but she will be in the same situation too. None of us live close, so we have to travel to see each other.

People can’t move to where their spouses are stationed In the us?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That's me. I don't click with DH's friend wife. Nothing is wrong, I just feel zero connection. I would gladly not join DH but he likes when I am with him. I like his friends, but not their wives.

I try not to take it personally because she doesn't have any close friends in our circle of about 20 couples. That said, I try my best to be friendly to her and wouldn't mind being friends, I respect who she is.