would you forgive your sister

[Anonymous]

If she tried to cause problems in your marriage? Twice.

[Anonymous]

You have to be more specific.

[Anonymous]

If serious and intentional, NO.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to be more specific.

+1

As we've seen on DCUM, there's an ocean of what people consider "justification" for things. Details are critical.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You have to be more specific.

The first time she started a fight with DW. Yes she started it. DW stood her ground but was polite. Next thing you know my sister is texting me the names of divorce lawyers. This time was a bit more passive aggressive still leaning towards aggressive. Asked me to exclude DW from Christmas with my family. When I told her I wasn't ditching my wife and child on Christmas. She replied with "well you would bring Darla of course". Mind you, she has zero reason to treat my wife badly. I responded with "we're done here. I won't be seeing you at all for Christmas" theb she says "I understand that you have to listen to your wife and make her happy." Then she texts my wife and says "we hardly see my brother lately and were hoping to see him and Darla just them this year. Just the blood relatives."

[Anonymous]

Sounds like borderline personality disorder. Forgiveness is irrelevant here because she's crazy. However, I think you guys both need to block her texts.

[Anonymous]

Oh and ran into a friend of mine earlier and he told me he was sorry to hear I was getting divorced. He confirmed that my sister told him that and that my wife was controlling and abusive and she's just so happy I'm wising up.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You have to be more specific.

The first time she started a fight with DW. Yes she started it. DW stood her ground but was polite. Next thing you know my sister is texting me the names of divorce lawyers. This time was a bit more passive aggressive still leaning towards aggressive. Asked me to exclude DW from Christmas with my family. When I told her I wasn't ditching my wife and child on Christmas. She replied with "well you would bring Darla of course". Mind you, she has zero reason to treat my wife badly. I responded with "we're done here. I won't be seeing you at all for Christmas" theb she says "I understand that you have to listen to your wife and make her happy." Then she texts my wife and says "we hardly see my brother lately and were hoping to see him and Darla just them this year. Just the blood relatives."

I'm PP re: more specific. With this information, I would not engage further. Ignore.

[Anonymous]

Whoa. This sounds like my SIL. When she's going through a BPD episode she tries to break up our marriage via random texts and emails. We've blocked her number and emails. Sometimes she uses burner phones but otherwise we have really strict boundaries around how we communicate. The forgiveness part of the situation is something DH and I are still considering. We know we need to but are struggling to make it happen.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whoa. This sounds like my SIL. When she's going through a BPD episode she tries to break up our marriage via random texts and emails. We've blocked her number and emails. Sometimes she uses burner phones but otherwise we have really strict boundaries around how we communicate. The forgiveness part of the situation is something DH and I are still considering. We know we need to but are struggling to make it happen.

I think this is more a "I didn't get my way disorder".

[Anonymous]

Does your sister have a husband and/or kids?

[Anonymous]

Cut out the cancer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Does your sister have a husband and/or kids?

Yes, she's been with her husband 12 years. He considers my dad his dad so they consider him a blood relative.

[Anonymous]

No, I would not forgive my sister. I'd disengage from her immediately.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Whoa. This sounds like my SIL. When she's going through a BPD episode she tries to break up our marriage via random texts and emails. We've blocked her number and emails. Sometimes she uses burner phones but otherwise we have really strict boundaries around how we communicate. The forgiveness part of the situation is something DH and I are still considering. We know we need to but are struggling to make it happen.

My wife does think she might have BPD pr something along the lines. I don't. My wife told me that my sister was telling her about problems my sister is having with her brother in law(her husband's brother). Apparently her MIL was planning a special Christmas activity next weekend. Sister told her that wouldn't work for them as her DH isn't working. So it got planned for the next weekend. Come to find out her BIL has to work. Wife says my sister said how he's going to have to accept that her DH is more special.