Moms, could you support you and your kids on your salary alone?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have kids when I was single, because I didn't think I'd be able to support them on my own. I waited until I was married.

And I didn't marry some random stranger. I married a person I knew for 6 years. I married a guy I thought, and had years of experience to bakc this up, would be: decent, hard working, and would be caring and have concern for his kids. I specifically looked for that, in a mate.

I don't think he could support a family all on his own, and I know I couldn't. It really takes two IMO to do a decent job at raising kids. If he suddenly left me, it'd be really hard... but I don't think that is very likely.

C'mon, this question is hypothetical. Suppose your husband was on a work trip and when he was out by himself somewhere...., and OK I give up, whatever- think Goldie Hawn in "Overboard". Amnesia, no recollection of a former life. What would you do?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have kids when I was single, because I didn't think I'd be able to support them on my own. I waited until I was married.

And I didn't marry some random stranger. I married a person I knew for 6 years. I married a guy I thought, and had years of experience to bakc this up, would be: decent, hard working, and would be caring and have concern for his kids. I specifically looked for that, in a mate.

I don't think he could support a family all on his own, and I know I couldn't. It really takes two IMO to do a decent job at raising kids. If he suddenly left me, it'd be really hard... but I don't think that is very likely.[/quote]


Famous last words!

[Anonymous]

Yes- I have a masters from a top b-school and was lucky enough that I worked p/t (from home) as a consultant after my second child- now dh and i are very close salary-wise over 160k (working f/t but very family friendly schedule- i can take off when needed / friday leave at noon)..

[Anonymous]

I do.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have kids when I was single, because I didn't think I'd be able to support them on my own. I waited until I was married.

And I didn't marry some random stranger. I married a person I knew for 6 years. I married a guy I thought, and had years of experience to bakc this up, would be: decent, hard working, and would be caring and have concern for his kids. I specifically looked for that, in a mate.

I don't think he could support a family all on his own, and I know I couldn't. It really takes two IMO to do a decent job at raising kids. If he suddenly left me, it'd be really hard... but I don't think that is very likely.

Me too!

...except we got divorced anyway.

[Anonymous]

But did he just... disappear? That's what I think is rather unlikely -- the hypothetical is that he just disappears. Stops working, no child support, no way to find him.

I just don't see that as terribly likely to happen to me. Divorce... maybe. But total abandonment? I just am not worried abou that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I didn't have kids when I was single, because I didn't think I'd be able to support them on my own. I waited until I was married.

And I didn't marry some random stranger. I married a person I knew for 6 years. I married a guy I thought, and had years of experience to bakc this up, would be: decent, hard working, and would be caring and have concern for his kids. I specifically looked for that, in a mate.

I don't think he could support a family all on his own, and I know I couldn't. It really takes two IMO to do a decent job at raising kids. If he suddenly left me, it'd be really hard... but I don't think that is very likely.

C'mon, this question is hypothetical. Suppose your husband was on a work trip and when he was out by himself somewhere...., and OK I give up, whatever- think Goldie Hawn in "Overboard". Amnesia, no recollection of a former life. What would you do?

It would suck. I already said -- he couldn't make it without me, and I couldn't without him. We have life insurance and stuff like that, of course, and savings, and there;s the house... but if I didn't have access to all that? If he wiped outthe bank accounts before he left? It would suck. Still I don't worry about that all happening.

[Anonymous]

Yes, but I'd want to move out into the 'burbs in order to afford something that would give us a little more space than an apartment. And I don't think I'd mind that... And we'd have to seriously pinch. My hubs makes almost 3X what I do, so it would be a lifestyle change (and we are not decadent people... very modest little townhouse in the district, in a 'transitioning' neighborhood).

[Anonymous]

Tons of fathers in this economy don't have jobs so if your DH left you, it might be hard or impossible for him to pay child support unless he has tons in savings. So I think it is best to plan for getting no child support for a while. It also takes a while from the time you file a claim to actually get any support. In my case, it took between 6-9 months.

[Anonymous]

I'm not married, but I'm a single mom and my daughter's dad is in the picture and paying for half of her daycare. I sometimes think about what would happen if he died and none of his insurance went to me, but was held in trust for her. Technically I could probably *just* support her on my salary alone, but it would be really hard, and we'd have to stay in our current house, so she'd eventually go to a crappy high school. At least with his insurance money, I could stop saving for her college, which would help.