Kiss-ass parents

[Anonymous]

The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent. AND these type of parents usually can barely even walk up the stadium steps without wheezing because they are so out of shape and then scream at their kid the entire game and get annoyed when their child is subbed out for someone better. It’s so pathetic. Every club has these kinds of parents.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:My god!! When does it stop?!

My oldest is U16, youngest U13. We suffered at some Clubs where the parents currying favor were at insane levels.

It hasn’t stopped. Both teams have a dad that has self-appointed him assistant coach and in charge of the Coach’s refreshments—-even handing them out during the game.

We arrived early to the U13 game where “Coach” dad was giving real Coacj his assessment of the team and how they play and where kids should play. Of course, with his kid (not even a top 5-8 player on team) as starring role.

And this sh@t actually works. Kid starts every game—though usually pulled out after 15 min for better player that plays rest of game. But it does a psych # on kids when they see these kids with kiss @ss dads be the 1 player to move up or start on first team even when they aren’t one of the top players.

It is less so on elite teams—but to my dismay it still happens.

You might want to look in the mirror. You sound ridicuous. If your kid is that good they get play time. You don't like the coach leave.


Makes me laugh too since so many of these dads never played the game or did so at a low level. I have to sit here as a D1, National club team player, Gatorade state player and bite my tongue.

I’m not paying $3k/year for my kid to be coached by dipsh@t Coach dad.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:^OP here. thanks. I notice the kids that have zero off the ball knowledge, sloppy touch, not knowing when to pass or dribble, not taking space, etc. The ones that don’t know where to move/shift or make runs.

Definitely in the minority on the sidelines. But dad was a high level coach for 22 years. And all of us played at very elite levels.

I bite my tongue a lot.

My comment wasn't addressed specifically to you. I was just noting that while cronyism happens, it is also true that parents are not always correct in their assessment that that is what is happening either. I have seen examples of both issues at every level - although I am not really able to judge the players properly myself at the highest levels, just able to detect when other parents know even less than I do. I find my DS' and his teammates opinions to be worth listening to though - the kids themselves usually know (a lot) more than the parents .

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent. AND these type of parents usually can barely even walk up the stadium steps without wheezing because they are so out of shape and then scream at their kid the entire game and get annoyed when their child is subbed out for someone better. It’s so pathetic. Every club has these kinds of parents.

+1

You can tell a lot about kids’ genetics, lifestyle and future by looking at mom and dad.

[Anonymous]

My comment wasn't addressed specifically to you. I was just noting that while cronyism happens, it is also true that parents are not always correct in their assessment that that is what is happening either. I have seen examples of both issues at every level - although I am not really able to judge the players properly myself at the highest levels, just able to detect when other parents know even less than I do. I find my DS' and his teammates opinions to be worth listening to though - the kids themselves usually know (a lot) more than the parents .

I agree with that. My son plays defense and likes doing so, and so has no personal stake in thinking that one offensive player is better than another on his team. Often, when I say that an offensive player is good, he tells me that I am mistaking aggression and recklessness for being good, and that another player is actually much better. I assume he is right, since he spends many more hours on soccer than I do (I play in a 45 plus rec league for 1 hour a week).

[Anonymous]

The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent.

I'm not sure that is true. I think my ex husband volunteers to do the most because literally he has no other interests, besides my daughter's sports and work.

[Anonymous]

Volunteering to help out is very different than kissing the coach’s ass and trying to gain favor for your child and being an overall nuisance.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent.

I'm not sure that is true. I think my ex husband volunteers to do the most because literally he has no other interests, besides my daughter's sports and work.

i am not touching that one

[Anonymous]

That’s exactly my DS and DD play tennis and golf, respectively. You’re what the score says you are, and no coaches or any parents can change that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:That’s exactly my DS and DD play tennis and golf, respectively. You’re what the score says you are, and no coaches or any parents can change that.

Track is good too. The clock doesn’t lie.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:That’s exactly my DS and DD play tennis and golf, respectively. You’re what the score says you are, and no coaches or any parents can change that.

Track is good too. The clock doesn’t lie.

The body on a track can definitely lie!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Really just one more facet of the terrible "pay to play" system ...

Not really. Don’t think for a second that this doesn’t occur in Europe or in South America. Their youth club academy system is filled with stories of parents politicking their way to the top. In South America, the clubs do not have private ownership and are run by the supporters. That either leads to players being given additional opportunities based on who they know or greed.

That isn’t to say that the American system is perfect. Far from it. But ‘pay to play’ exists everywhere-it just looks a little different.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This has been very common in our experience. Certain kids get preferred treatment because the parents kiss a$$ constantly. This is even more apparent if the coach also trains kids or has a side business, which most do. It's all a game. The kids who do "extra" training with the coach and just so happen pay their coach to train more are treated differently.

We do extra training, but I like my kids to hear from many different coaches and have different experiences instead of just one. God forbid you don't do the extra training, camps, trips etc that your coach puts on. Some parents push a lot of business to their coach through their training businesses and those kids are always treated differently. If you cut the kid, or piss of the parents, it will cost you many thousands of dollars every year so the coaches have a financial interest in making sure an inferior player keeps up. We have one parent who really pushes business to the coach, like a lot. Before and after every game he is over there talking with the coach - It's incredibly annoying to watch. It always starts with a plug on how they just gave the coaches info to someone for training and then get quickly into their own self interests. It's crazy.

This seems like a clear conflict of interest. Of course the coach is not going to cut the kid/or piss off the dad when the guy is essentially working for him providing contacts to train.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent. AND these type of parents usually can barely even walk up the stadium steps without wheezing because they are so out of shape and then scream at their kid the entire game and get annoyed when their child is subbed out for someone better. It’s so pathetic. Every club has these kinds of parents.

+1

You can tell a lot about kids’ genetics, lifestyle and future by looking at mom and dad.

No I have seen so many former top level athletes blow up(get fat) or hobbled by old injuries once their careers are over that judging them by their appearance now is silly. The parents who seem the worst are the CrossFit gym rat parents. They never played at any kind of level and did not know soccer existed till their kids made the team. They scream at their kid, suck up to the coach, suck up to parents from the team above them and most bizarrely they suck up to the top kids on the team while rooting for everyone to fail.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:The parents who do the most usually have the least skilled/athletic players on the team. The parents feel the need to compensate for their child’s lack of talent. AND these type of parents usually can barely even walk up the stadium steps without wheezing because they are so out of shape and then scream at their kid the entire game and get annoyed when their child is subbed out for someone better. It’s so pathetic. Every club has these kinds of parents.

+1

You can tell a lot about kids’ genetics, lifestyle and future by looking at mom and dad.

No I have seen so many former top level athletes blow up(get fat) or hobbled by old injuries once their careers are over that judging them by their appearance now is silly. The parents who seem the worst are the CrossFit gym rat parents. They never played at any kind of level and did not know soccer existed till their kids made the team. They scream at their kid, suck up to the coach, suck up to parents from the team above them and most bizarrely they suck up to the top kids on the team while rooting for everyone to fail.

Yeah. I haven't seen that. Even my brother that was a professional soccer player and is in his 50s, a bachelor that drinks too much and doesn't regularly workout from arthritis and past injuries is still 6'2" and looks like a former athlete. Our friend with a Superbowl ring isn't as hugely muscular, but is still incredibly fit in his 50s...muscle memory--I work out a helluva lot more than he does. The Ex basketball player on my kids team (final 4) play hobbles on his knee but you can tell he played. The coaching staff at my kids' Club are all fit.

A lot of those fat *sses are lying about their past glory in sports.