May-September Relationships

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Half your age plus seven years. Works every time and works for both men and women. 80 year old dating a 47 year old? Fine. 50 year old dating a 20 year old? Gross.
I’m a 48 year old woman...anything under 31 would be gross.

It's really amazing to me how well this formula works. It fascinates me in the way of a really elegant computer program or math problem. It doesn't really break down until you get to ~9 year olds or younger (who shouldn't be dating anyway!) But, yeah, that 50 year old shouldn't be dating anyone younger than 32.

It's about age without a doubt. That is what the bigotry expressed here focuses on. Sometimes psychobabble is used to justify it (e.g. "grooming" - as if this was something bad! - caring spouses do this for each other). When people condemn others by thinking in terms of demographic categories and not in term of concrete human beings, they are guilty of unvarnished prejudice. Notice the comments in terms of "a 50 year old" who shouldn't be dating a young lady of such and such age. Says who? The people involved in the relationship are the ones who get to decide this, nobody else. When someone who has zero knowledge of either of the people in a relationship has the presumption to offer an opinion about the relationship, that opinion is worthless since it is based upon ignorance and mere categorical thinking.

I wouldn't trade my loving and successful marriage for anything in the world.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Half your age plus seven years. Works every time and works for both men and women. 80 year old dating a 47 year old? Fine. 50 year old dating a 20 year old? Gross.
I’m a 48 year old woman...anything under 31 would be gross.

It's really amazing to me how well this formula works. It fascinates me in the way of a really elegant computer program or math problem. It doesn't really break down until you get to ~9 year olds or younger (who shouldn't be dating anyway!) But, yeah, that 50 year old shouldn't be dating anyone younger than 32.

It's about age without a doubt. That is what the bigotry expressed here focuses on. Sometimes psychobabble is used to justify it (e.g. "grooming" - as if this was something bad! - caring spouses do this for each other). When people condemn others by thinking in terms of demographic categories and not in term of concrete human beings, they are guilty of unvarnished prejudice. Notice the comments in terms of "a 50 year old" who shouldn't be dating a young lady of such and such age. Says who? The people involved in the relationship are the ones who get to decide this, nobody else. When someone who has zero knowledge of either of the people in a relationship has the presumption to offer an opinion about the relationship, that opinion is worthless since it is based upon ignorance and mere categorical thinking.

I wouldn't trade my loving and successful marriage for anything in the world.

“Grooming” is what it is called when an adult corresponds and interacts with a child intending to engage in a sexual relationship. That’s what you did with your “pen pal”.

Here’s the quiz for “is this creepy behavior”. Would you, at 50, have gone to one of your peers in the United States and told them that you wanted to start writing to their daughters so that you could marry them when they were legal?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Half your age plus seven years. Works every time and works for both men and women. 80 year old dating a 47 year old? Fine. 50 year old dating a 20 year old? Gross.
I’m a 48 year old woman...anything under 31 would be gross.

It's really amazing to me how well this formula works. It fascinates me in the way of a really elegant computer program or math problem. It doesn't really break down until you get to ~9 year olds or younger (who shouldn't be dating anyway!) But, yeah, that 50 year old shouldn't be dating anyone younger than 32.

It's about age without a doubt. That is what the bigotry expressed here focuses on. Sometimes psychobabble is used to justify it (e.g. "grooming" - as if this was something bad! - caring spouses do this for each other). When people condemn others by thinking in terms of demographic categories and not in term of concrete human beings, they are guilty of unvarnished prejudice. Notice the comments in terms of "a 50 year old" who shouldn't be dating a young lady of such and such age. Says who? The people involved in the relationship are the ones who get to decide this, nobody else. When someone who has zero knowledge of either of the people in a relationship has the presumption to offer an opinion about the relationship, that opinion is worthless since it is based upon ignorance and mere categorical thinking.

I wouldn't trade my loving and successful marriage for anything in the world.

“Grooming” is what it is called when an adult corresponds and interacts with a child intending to engage in a sexual relationship. That’s what you did with your “pen pal”.



Here’s the quiz for “is this creepy behavior”. Would you, at 50, have gone to one of your peers in the United States and told them that you wanted to start writing to their daughters so that you could marry them when they were legal?

It is hard to believe that this could get any sillier, but you just accomplished that. What I did with my pen pal is called courting - look it up if this is a new concept for you. Oh and, yes, when you marry a woman it is traditional to have sex with her so I must have "groomed" her as well. Such idiocy is mind boggling. Prejudice is truly blinding.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Agree it's insecurity. Same reason some women object to porn

wrong answer