The various types of DCUM posters

[Anonymous]

The Motivational Competitor:

"Let's try to hit 10 pages with this post!"

"We're on page 15! Can we make it to 20?"

[Anonymous]

The Hijacker. Someone who starts their own question mid-thread that only tangentially has to do with the original post.

[Anonymous]

The Greater Issue poster: your subject matter is silly compared to the Greater Issues in this world.

Example:

(OP) I am so frustrated about my husband's refusal to empty the trash. It's driving me nuts! It is his one household task, yet he never manages to get it done.
(Greater Issue poster) If this is your biggest concern, you should feel lucky! Don't you know there are dying children in Haiti? AIDS orphans in Africa? Homeless in our cities?

[Anonymous]

I think we can probably redefine the bitter nanny and the bitter parent posters into on 99% of the posters on the nanny forum posters. Seriously, they're nuts. Let's not kid ourselves. If I post a thoughtful response drawing from my many years as a nanny, someone accuses me of damaging children because someone other than their parents is caring for them.

And let's not forget the You are going to die! poster, who brings everything back to how you are somehow endangering the life of yourself, your kids or the people around you. This poster is a close relative of the Leave your husband! poster, who suggest that divorce is the solution for every marital hiccup.

[Anonymous]

School Snob posters are my least favorite.

[Anonymous]

Let us not forget THE "I didn't read the whole thread, so sorry if someone already said this but, here's what I have to say and you should take the time to read it even though I don't have the time or interest to read your posts..." POSTER

[Anonymous]

The "I haven't experienced this myself because I'm writing this from the Sibley OB ward, but" poster.

as in,

I haven't gone through high school admissions yet with DD (three weeks old tomorrow!) but it sounds like you are really not focusing on the important things.

I haven't dealt with this because DS is three months old and DH and I married in my second trimester, but have you and your husband tried couples counseling? A solid marriage is so important for children and sometimes an assault with a waffle iron is just a tormented cry of "I love you!"

My water broke 10 minutes ago and I can tell you right now-- I would NEVER tolerate behavior like that from my child.

Mom-to-be here; if you're so exhausted and miserable maybe you should put those sweet triplets up for adoption. There are plenty of women who would love to be in your situation and not see it as some kind of burden.

[Anonymous]

How about the pissed off single dad who hasn't gotten it in years and wants to take it out on the world poster? Possibly the guy who refuses to leave his parking space.