Ex from a long time ago's mom died

[Anonymous]

I wasn’t involved in the relationships at the funerals I attended so no insecurity but I felt for the ex in the families that had to deal with it on top of everything. It was awkward for many and several of us tried to smooth things out. That should not be the focus that day. Some posters here having a hard time understanding not all exes want to see each other especially when one is distraught. Unless there continued to be a close relationship, it can be more generous and considerate to do the note route if compelled and truly care.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Don't.

If a bunch of exes came out of the woodwork when my mom died I would have been pretty annoyed. If you really want to do something, make an anonymous donation to a charitable cause that you know she/the family cared about.

+1

[Anonymous]

I would leave it alone. If he posted about her death publicly on Fb and you made a comment, that is one thing. However, if he didn’t share this news with you or on social media for you to see and you haven’t spoke to him in years, then leave it alone.

If you must, a short card but not an email.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Because funerals are mainly for the grieving and it adds something they don’t need to deal with then. They are likely already emotionally exhausted. Unless the exes are on good terms and remain friendly, best not to take advantage of the opportunity to make an appearance for the wrong reasons.

It's very low class. My DH's ex out of the blue showed up at his mom's funeral but turned she only made a ass of herself by coming.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would too. The email would just focus on how much you thought of his mom and condolences, I would not catch him up on your life etc.

This, but I would send a physical card rather than an email. It invites future drunk correspondence much less.

This. Snail mail is much more formal and you could send something-- IDK Im catholic and a mass card would be appropriate.

[Anonymous]

Yes reconnect with him like Kevin and Sophie on this is us

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I would too. The email would just focus on how much you thought of his mom and condolences, I would not catch him up on your life etc.

Just write about his mom.

[Anonymous]

No don’t do that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Because funerals are mainly for the grieving and it adds something they don’t need to deal with then. They are likely already emotionally exhausted. Unless the exes are on good terms and remain friendly, best not to take advantage of the opportunity to make an appearance for the wrong reasons.

It's very low class. My DH's ex out of the blue showed up at his mom's funeral but turned she only made a ass of herself by coming.


Just stop. Like you are the Queen of England?