Teen sitter purposely misled me and made me look like the bad guy.

[Anonymous]

Teen did not purposely mislead you. You purposely were a jerk and made your own assumptions. Do you see some kind of conspiracy theory in everything?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

I appreciate the feedback and had discussed it with my husband. I’m going to text her about it and apologize for misunderstanding and being rude.

Phew. You're not too far gone to do the right thing. Good.

[Anonymous]

"Is everything ok?" That should have been your first question to her. Not showing your irritation. Plus, why were you irritated in the first place? She called you, notified you, even if her mom was stuck behind an accident why would that lead to irritation?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

I appreciate the feedback and had discussed it with my husband. I’m going to text her about it and apologize for misunderstanding and being rude.

Good for you! And maybe you could find it in your heart to send a fruit basket to the Mom and whatever the current equivalent is of an iTunes card to the kid - as a neighborly surprise. Seriously: good on you for reading through and processing all the feedback!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If my teen babysitter texted me that there had been been “an accident” where her mother couldn’t pick her up, my first thought would be a car accident and to ask if she/mother were okay - not think about how it would affect me.

How did she purposely mislead you? She said there was an accident and there was an accident. She stated a fact. I cannot believe you were bitchy to her over it! I hope she never works for you again.

I feel like I was misled and set up to look bitchy because I took her to mean “there has been an accident....And as a result my mom is stuck in traffic” not that she was in the accident.

The bad news is that you were not misled. "There has been an accident..." includes both stuck in traffic and Mom has been in an accident. It could be anything from accident blocking the road to Mom was in a minor fender bender, they need to exchange info, then will be on her way, to serious accident, Dad is going to bring me instead, but it will take a while. So, you shouldn't assume what it is, but ask for clarification. If you can be lenient on time, you can ask when she texts so that you can give her more leeway in when to arrive. If you can't, then you can ask for clarification when she arrives, or later, after you meeting when she is already there. Not only is the misunderstanding on your part because you assumed the most annoying, but inconsequential option for you, but also there is a problem because you also blamed her for the misunderstanding rather than blaming yourself. She said there was an accident. As you can see from responses, many people would ask whether everyone was okay and some would also ask if there was anything that you could do. You could have been understanding and nice, but instead you made assumptions, were rude and blamed her for your assumptions and misunderstanding. Yes, you owe her an apology and should do something nice to make up for it.

The good news is that you understand and are taking responsibility. You are going to apologize and do the right thing. Good for you.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When she said there was an accident, did you ask if everyone was okay?

No because I took it to mean her mother was stuck in traffic due to an accident not that she was actually involved in an accident

So you made a false assumption and acted like a jerk. You are the only one in the wrong here.

“Purposely misled me and made me look like the bad guy” is 100% unadulterated bull$h!t.

OP, I’ve only heard your side of the story and you are the bad guy.

[Anonymous]

OP, you sound like a massive jerk. Even if mom had not been the one in an accident, not sure why you would be annoyed with sitter for this...

[Anonymous]

This thread is probably not worth continuing. See link.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/0/880233.page#17153053

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:This thread is probably not worth continuing. See link.

https://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/0/880233.page#17153053

Oh boo. Total waste of the rare 100% agreement on DCUM.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:When she said there was an accident, did you ask if everyone was okay?

No because I took it to mean her mother was stuck in traffic due to an accident not that she was actually involved in an accident

Do you think that maybe since you are an adult and she is a teenager you could have given her the benefit of the doubt? You have said nothing that would make any of us assume she is not trustworthy. In fact, it seems she bent over backwards for your stupid sitting job where you had some conference calls even after her mom was rear-ended!

You should sincerely apologize and tell her how grateful you are for her. I’d even get her a little gift or give her a little bonus. Your attitude was SO uncalled for and you probably upset her.

You’re being dramatic. Of course I appreciate her, she has been with us for 2 years and the kids love her. She is here everyday after school normally but since the covid stuff, she has been with us for most of the day (if I have meetings) instead of just 4 hrs in the evening. I certainly trust her or I wouldn’t have her caring for my kids. It’s just in this instance, I felt set up.

Why do you have a teen working full time?! When can she relax and do her schoolwork l?!

[Anonymous]

If she is working for you every day she spends more time with your kids than you. I don't get why she needed a ride if she live on your block but my first reaction would be is everyone ok and can I come get you?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:She texted saying that she was running late, her mom hadn’t picked her up because there “was an accident”. I was clearly annoyed with her that I would have to make other arrangements and I had several conference calls scheduled. She got to our house about 35 mins after the time we planned for her to be here and I was short with her because of the difficulties. Later on, she tells my DH that she’s sorry again for the disruption because of her mom being in an accident earlier in the day. He told me about it and I feel terrible. Her family lives on our street and i saw her mom going in the house with crutches so i know she’s telling the truth. She phrased it that there was an accident, not that her mom had been rear ended! Now I look like a jerk. What would you do or say in this situation?

You are a jerk and I hope sitter's mother will refuse to let her babysit for you again.

[Anonymous]

Apologize. Say you’re sorry you didn’t realize her mom was n an accident. Offer to take a casserole. Pick the sitter up yourself next time or pay for an Uber or have her walk over.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Apologize. Say you’re sorry you didn’t realize her mom was n an accident. Offer to take a casserole. Pick the sitter up yourself next time or pay for an Uber or have her walk over.

A casserole for essentially calling babysitter a liar? I think not. Babysitter should cross her off her list and tell every sitter she knows what a jerk OP is.

[Anonymous]

OP has already been outed as a troll, guys.