I’m not a bad mom because my daughter is “girly.”

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m getting really tired of the comments from other moms that ask me if I hate that my daughter likes pink, or if I tried to talk her out of being Elsa for Halloween. My daughter is who she is, and trust me, if you knew her, you’d know you can’t change her mind on anything anyway. My daughter likes to play dinosaurs, ninjas, and Batman with her brother, but she LOVES unicorns, sparkles, baby dolls, and tea parties as well and I’m sorry, but that doesn’t make her any less of a strong young lady.

I think this attitude comes from women and is pretty mysonigist. We have no problems with boys liking sparkly stuff, because that’s open minded (and I agree) but we aren’t as comfortable with girls liking the same things. I also find the phrase mean girls problematic and I’ve heard girls as young as 2-3 being described that way.

Speak for yourself. Some of us definitely would have problems with boys liking sparkly things, especially when it's pushed on them.

When are people forcing girly things onto your boys? That's never happened to my 7yo son.

I'm the PP with the sparklyloving daughter, and I have absolutely seen sparkly boys cozying up to DD. So in my experience, yes, I can see where it would happen in other circles of school aged friends arond this age, or any really. A pink lunchbox, an elsa backpack, etc. Breaking norms and looking for a reaction. It happens. I say how cool it is, and carry on, since that is all that matters. How cool it is. YMMV

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m getting really tired of the comments from other moms that ask me if I hate that my daughter likes pink, or if I tried to talk her out of being Elsa for Halloween. My daughter is who she is, and trust me, if you knew her, you’d know you can’t change her mind on anything anyway. My daughter likes to play dinosaurs, ninjas, and Batman with her brother, but she LOVES unicorns, sparkles, baby dolls, and tea parties as well and I’m sorry, but that doesn’t make her any less of a strong young lady.

I think this attitude comes from women and is pretty mysonigist. We have no problems with boys liking sparkly stuff, because that’s open minded (and I agree) but we aren’t as comfortable with girls liking the same things. I also find the phrase mean girls problematic and I’ve heard girls as young as 2-3 being described that way.

Speak for yourself. Some of us definitely would have problems with boys liking sparkly things, especially when it's pushed on them.

When are people forcing girly things onto your boys? That's never happened to my 7yo son.

I'm the PP with the sparklyloving daughter, and I have absolutely seen sparkly boys cozying up to DD. So in my experience, yes, I can see where it would happen in other circles of school aged friends arond this age, or any really. A pink lunchbox, an elsa backpack, etc. Breaking norms and looking for a reaction. It happens. I say how cool it is, and carry on, since that is all that matters. How cool it is. YMMV

I was asking when sparkly things have been "pushed on" her boys.

[Anonymous]

So you mean every girl in that age group? I don’t get it.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I’m getting really tired of the comments from other moms that ask me if I hate that my daughter likes pink, or if I tried to talk her out of being Elsa for Halloween. My daughter is who she is, and trust me, if you knew her, you’d know you can’t change her mind on anything anyway. My daughter likes to play dinosaurs, ninjas, and Batman with her brother, but she LOVES unicorns, sparkles, baby dolls, and tea parties as well and I’m sorry, but that doesn’t make her any less of a strong young lady.

I think this attitude comes from women and is pretty mysonigist. We have no problems with boys liking sparkly stuff, because that’s open minded (and I agree) but we aren’t as comfortable with girls liking the same things. I also find the phrase mean girls problematic and I’ve heard girls as young as 2-3 being described that way.

Speak for yourself. Some of us definitely would have problems with boys liking sparkly things, especially when it's pushed on them.

When are people forcing girly things onto your boys? That's never happened to my 7yo son.

I'm the PP with the sparklyloving daughter, and I have absolutely seen sparkly boys cozying up to DD. So in my experience, yes, I can see where it would happen in other circles of school aged friends arond this age, or any really. A pink lunchbox, an elsa backpack, etc. Breaking norms and looking for a reaction. It happens. I say how cool it is, and carry on, since that is all that matters. How cool it is. YMMV

Wtf is a sparkly boy ?

[Anonymous]

These types of comment deserves a dowager of countess of grantham zinger!

I qould have said, why? Do you hate your chd for being who he/she is?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Don’t you find all that precious energy kind of tedious? I’m a very feminine woman, but I find little girls who are into glitter and pink,etc, excessively banal and annoying. real ballerinas only wear tutus in performances, and sparkles make you look like like a stripper. I would never buy my daughter half the crap they try and sell to girls. most “girly” is just crass materialism Girly is annoying. Feminine is not.

.

Now this annoys me about feminism today. I thought the point of feminism was to make sure that girls/women had the opportunity to be who they wanted to be. Just as I don't think it's right for girls to be denied opportunities (assuming they're otherwise qualified) because the roles are traditionally filled by males, I think it's wrong to say that girls can't do things because they're too girly.

Now wearing tutus may not be practical for most situations and I wouldn't advise stripper clothes for little girls, but contrary to pp, I think things can be pink, glittery, and sparkly, without being inappropriate. Annoying? Maybe, but that's a judgement call of the viewer. Annoying is not the same as offensive, and I imagine everything annoys someone. Crass materialism? Absolutely, but try to find something that isn't. I would also say that sports stuff, natural/eco-type stuff, even holiday stuff like Thanksgiving and Christmas can have crass materialistic aspects. If anybody wants anything, somebody will try to make a buck off it.

It has nothing to do with feminism, The word I was looking for is “tacky.” All that girly shit is tacky.

[Anonymous]

I feel like a lot of posts boil down to “my friends say crappy things to me.” Almost all of those posts could be solved by the OP widening her social circle and finding new friends.
I don’t doubt you’ve had this experience, OP, but I don’t think it’s a prevalent attitude in most American communities, even in educated liberal feminist circles.

[Anonymous]

I feel you OP. The culture right now is beyond weird. Vilify young boys for acting like boys and shame young girls for liking "girly" things. I have two of each and there is a whole lot of biology and personality in there that you can't (shouldn't) override. Just parent how you feel is best, let your kid be who they are, and ignore everyone else!

[Anonymous]

PP, totally agree it's tacky, but really who cares? I don't like it, but my kid does and it's her body. I highly doubt she's going to be wearing tutus, sequins, and head to toe pink when she's 12. And if she does, IT'S STILL HER BODY. Unless it's dirty or not seasonally appropriate, I don't see it as my business to dictate how she dresses herself.

[Anonymous]

Some of y'all are in denial or haven't encountered people who OP is describing. I completely get it. I know people who would be proud if my son dressed up as Elsa for Halloween yet if my daughter did, she's fitting a stereotypical female role or other some such bs. Let kids be kids. It's gone the other way now.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:So, your daughter is average and the norm. Most girls are generally into pink and sparkles. You are raising and utterly unremarkable child. Good for you.

Unremarkable in THIS one way. I'm sure she's got plenty to offer, and enjoying pink does not make her less worthy.

In case it wasn't obvious, pp was a hateful shrew who was deliberately trying to belittle OP, probably due to rampant feelings of inadequacy about her own parenting skills. In other words, she's s shit mom and knows it.