DH is claiming to be Jewish with no verifiable proof.

[Anonymous]

"His mother was estranged from her own grandmother who was the last person in his family believed to have been an observant Jew."

You've just stated his proof yourself... his great grandmother was an observant Jew.

I don't understand why he would need to scour through decades & decades of his lineage, just to find exactly what you provided us with here - which is fact based information that his great grandmother WAS in fact Jewish.

In the Jewish religion, Judaism is passed down through the mother. His "observant" great grandmother passed it down to his grandmother, who then passed it down to his mother, and then in turn it was passed down to him.

The fact that neither his grandmother or his mother was observant has ZERO bearing on whether he's Jewish or not... he IS Jewish.

If his great grandmother was observant, I imagine that she belonged to a temple /shul.
If you know where she lived, it would be easy to reach out to the local temples in the area & ask if she were a member.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

DH was not sure how to go about all of it. The rabbi had asked for verifiable proof so DH could participate in the birthright trip. I think DH got the idea that he needed to have some kind of proof of his heritage in order to participate in any kind of practice within the jewish community. Again, with limited resources and difficulty with translation, also the family tale that his great grandmother may have converted made the research all the more difficult.

DH does absolutley collect judaica, but I think it's because he wants to have a connection to Jewish culture but has no idea how to go about all of it. He's told me he feels like an outsider, but doesn't know what to do.

I'm fine with whatever choice he makes. But again, I'm not religious at all and have no interest in converting.

PP again...

I forgot to mention that I went on a birthright trip when I was a teenager, so I asked my parents if we had to provide proof of my Judaism & they said no.

However...

Since every Jew in the entire world (between the ages of 18 - 32) is eligible for a FREE birthright trip to Israel, I can see why some kind of proof is probably necessary (if nothing more than to deter scammers from trying to take advantage of a free trip).

Maybe because we went through our temple we weren't required to show proof?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

DH was not sure how to go about all of it. The rabbi had asked for verifiable proof so DH could participate in the birthright trip. I think DH got the idea that he needed to have some kind of proof of his heritage in order to participate in any kind of practice within the jewish community. Again, with limited resources and difficulty with translation, also the family tale that his great grandmother may have converted made the research all the more difficult.

DH does absolutley collect judaica, but I think it's because he wants to have a connection to Jewish culture but has no idea how to go about all of it. He's told me he feels like an outsider, but doesn't know what to do.

I'm fine with whatever choice he makes. But again, I'm not religious at all and have no interest in converting.

PP again...

I forgot to mention that I went on a birthright trip when I was a teenager, so I asked my parents if we had to provide proof of my Judaism & they said no.

However...

Since every Jew in the entire world (between the ages of 18 - 32) is eligible for a FREE birthright trip to Israel, I can see why some kind of proof is probably necessary (if nothing more than to deter scammers from trying to take advantage of a free trip).

Maybe because we went through our temple we weren't required to show proof?

DD got a certificate when she was Bat Mitzvah'ed. So there is that.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get it. Are you Jewish?

If so your kids will be Jewish and you can be reform or conservative whatever,

If not, why is he so into this exactly?

Not true both my sisters were born Jewish, married non Jews and both kids are being raised Catholic, please in light of our world today, do not over generalize..ridiculous!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I don’t get it. Are you Jewish?

If so your kids will be Jewish and you can be reform or conservative whatever,

If not, why is he so into this exactly?

Not true both my sisters were born Jewish, married non Jews and both kids are being raised Catholic, please in light of our world today, do not over generalize..ridiculous!

NP, and you're absolutely wrong.
They were BORN Jewish, just because they chose to raise them as something else does not nullify the fact that they were born Jews.

Since the OP's husband wasn't raised in any other religion, he is still Jewish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

DH was not sure how to go about all of it. The rabbi had asked for verifiable proof so DH could participate in the birthright trip. I think DH got the idea that he needed to have some kind of proof of his heritage in order to participate in any kind of practice within the jewish community. Again, with limited resources and difficulty with translation, also the family tale that his great grandmother may have converted made the research all the more difficult.

DH does absolutley collect judaica, but I think it's because he wants to have a connection to Jewish culture but has no idea how to go about all of it. He's told me he feels like an outsider, but doesn't know what to do.

I'm fine with whatever choice he makes. But again, I'm not religious at all and have no interest in converting.

PP again...

I forgot to mention that I went on a birthright trip when I was a teenager, so I asked my parents if we had to provide proof of my Judaism & they said no.

However...

Since every Jew in the entire world (between the ages of 18 - 32) is eligible for a FREE birthright trip to Israel, I can see why some kind of proof is probably necessary (if nothing more than to deter scammers from trying to take advantage of a free trip).

Maybe because we went through our temple we weren't required to show proof?

DD got a certificate when she was Bat Mitzvah'ed. So there is that.

Um, are you saying that you have to be bat-mitzvahed to participate in birthright?
Because that's not true at all.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I would not do a dna test, that is very controversial and does not prove anything
What is available online is only what is in American records. Sounds like you need information on records in Poland but are not sure how to research that further

DNA tests are not very controversial. Some people are not comfortable doing them; while others are. They aren't 100% accurate as far as heritage but are a somewhat accurate indicator of ethnicity that will be improved over time. A rabbi is not going to accept Ancestry DNA results that say someone is 12% Jewish as "proof" that the person is Jewish, but the DNA results can lead to clues about which side of the family his Jewish ancestors are (if any) and also lead to family matches who might have more documented evidence of his Jewish family. One clue at a time.

Genealogical records online are absolutely not ONLY American records. There are records from countries all over the world on many different databases online including Ancestry, Family Search, My Heritage, JewishGen, JRI-Poland, Yad Vashem, and countless other databases. Jewish records from Eastern Europe are a bit more difficult to find than some other countries' records, but some are available online. I have found census records from a Polish city that my Jewish 3rd great-grandfather lived in in 1875 on JRI-Poland; I found Holocaust records on Yad Vashem; and I've found non-Jewish records from Germany on Ancestry, etc. Sometimes, you get to a point where you cannot go any further online, and you have to hire a researcher on the ground in the country for help or wait until more records come online and are translated. But to say what is available online is only American records is completely false.

It sounds like this person needs to start documenting exactly what he has and follow the paper trail until he cannot go back any further. If he's not familiar with doing genealogy research, there are resources that he can use - a local Jewish genealogical society might be able to help him. Or there is an online Facebook group called Tracing the Tribe which has many helpful (some professional) genealogist on there who can help him find records - sometimes in minutes.

What he does with the information after he finds - whether it's to bringing Jewish cultural aspects into his life or pursuing becoming active in a Jewish religious life - is his call.

Source - have been a hobby genealogist for over 25 years

Stop promoting DNA tests, you are entitled to your dna privacy. The results will not make you Jewish.
Sounds like grandma disowned her daughter and most likely had a 'funeral' for her as well. Why try and join a community that through you out?

Please... do tell us more personalized information about the OP's husband's family, that even he doesn't know about.
We're dying for you to give us your psychic take.

A community didn't "through" his mother out (how would one do that anyway?) a grandmother disowned a grandchild... hard stop.
You know nothing about a funeral or anything else that occurred... you're projecting.

But by all means, continue to tell us about the great big world from your teeny tiny little mind, it's utterly fascinating how daft it is.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

DH was not sure how to go about all of it. The rabbi had asked for verifiable proof so DH could participate in the birthright trip. I think DH got the idea that he needed to have some kind of proof of his heritage in order to participate in any kind of practice within the jewish community. Again, with limited resources and difficulty with translation, also the family tale that his great grandmother may have converted made the research all the more difficult.

DH does absolutley collect judaica, but I think it's because he wants to have a connection to Jewish culture but has no idea how to go about all of it. He's told me he feels like an outsider, but doesn't know what to do.

I'm fine with whatever choice he makes. But again, I'm not religious at all and have no interest in converting.

PP again...

I forgot to mention that I went on a birthright trip when I was a teenager, so I asked my parents if we had to provide proof of my Judaism & they said no.

However...

Since every Jew in the entire world (between the ages of 18 - 32) is eligible for a FREE birthright trip to Israel, I can see why some kind of proof is probably necessary (if nothing more than to deter scammers from trying to take advantage of a free trip).

Maybe because we went through our temple we weren't required to show proof?

DD got a certificate when she was Bat Mitzvah'ed. So there is that.

Um, are you saying that you have to be bat-mitzvahed to participate in birthright?
Because that's not true at all.

No. But that is proof one is Jewish

[Anonymous]

OP, what other religion did he think he was, if any, before he got into this? And what religion are you, if any?

[Anonymous]

He sounds bored and acting out

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

"His mother was estranged from her own grandmother who was the last person in his family believed to have been an observant Jew."

You've just stated his proof yourself... his great grandmother was an observant Jew.

I don't understand why he would need to scour through decades & decades of his lineage, just to find exactly what you provided us with here - which is fact based information that his great grandmother WAS in fact Jewish.

In the Jewish religion, Judaism is passed down through the mother. His "observant" great grandmother passed it down to his grandmother, who then passed it down to his mother, and then in turn it was passed down to him.

The fact that neither his grandmother or his mother was observant has ZERO bearing on whether he's Jewish or not... he IS Jewish.

If his great grandmother was observant, I imagine that she belonged to a temple /shul.
If you know where she lived, it would be easy to reach out to the local temples in the area & ask if she were a member.

Did OP state that it was direct matrilineal descent? I saw mention of the mother and the mother’s grandmother but not whether it was a maternal or paternal grandmother. If the latter it would be a problem from a religious standpoint in many synagogues. Which could be overcome through conversion.

[Anonymous]

No, a person is not “Jewish” just because a maternal great-grandmother was Jewish, at least not in the eyes of most people who consider Judaism a religion, not an indelible magic stamp that persists for all time through the maternal bloodline. Yes, I know orthodox rabbis take this view. But... one of my great-grandmothers was Irish. The others were not. This does not make me “Irish,” and does not give me a deep mystical connection to Ireland, it just makes me someone who is about 1/8 Irish in terms of genealogical ancestry. It does not somehow drown out the other seven non-Irish contributors to my genetics.

Being Jewish is a choice he can make. Or not. The fact that a bunch of orthodox rabbis might want him to convert versus say he does not need to convert should not be what defines his choices.

[Anonymous]

OP, it sounds like what is troubling you is not the question; of whether or not he really has a Jewish ancestors, but some uneasiness with what seems like a sudden obsessive need to define his identity in ethnic and religious terms. I would find this worrying as well. It suggests that he has some serious unresolved issues about family and identity. It’s no different from someone out of the blue becoming obsessed with Buddhism or New Age practices or anything else. Psychologically balanced and healthy people do not become suddenly obsessed with “belonging” in his way. Maybe a therapist would be more useful than a rabbi.

[Anonymous]

So, if we move to a totally new city and join a synagogue... will we be questioned first by the rabbi to make sure we aren't faking it?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:So, if we move to a totally new city and join a synagogue... will we be questioned first by the rabbi to make sure we aren't faking it?

Nope. I’ve joined synagogues in several cities, and have never been questioned. DH is an active member of our current synagogue and he’s not Jewish.