Husband doesn’t get up with the baby so I want him to sleep on the couch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sell the necklace and use the money towards a mattress.

Beat me to it!

I think God would want this guy to take care of his family.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Sell the necklace and use the money towards a mattress.

This. Problem solved.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:You sound sleep-deprived most certainly. Your husband is doing his part though. He does need his sleep to be able to function at work and the fact that he helps so much after work is amazing! You’re home, you should be doing the night work. Sleep during the day when the baby sleeps. I slept on a blow up mattress in the baby’s room at the beginning so my husband could sleep. This period of time seems long now but it will pass quickly. Start saving for the mattress now and by the time the baby isn’t up so much you’ll have a nice new mattress to sleep on. You HAVE to nap when the baby does during the day.

Keep in mind they are setting a pattern now, though. Will it be "amazing" when OP is back to work and also has to help after work? Will DH suddenly start waking up with the baby after 3 months of learning to tune it out because Mommy will take care of it? I'm not a fan of giving dads extra credit for doing less than the minimum if what moms will be expected to do after maternity leave.

[Anonymous]

Go sleep on the couch and tell him he can bring the baby to you when the baby wakes if you are breastfeeding. Solved!

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Go sleep on the couch and tell him he can bring the baby to you when the baby wakes if you are breastfeeding. Solved!

+1.

I moved out of the bedroom because Dh and DC are too loud. Best decision ever.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I still don't get why Op doesn't opt for the couch. It is a win-win. And sounds absolutely lovely to be honest!

+1 In my apartment, the person who got the couch was the lucky one while the one who slept in the room with the baby was in for a bad night. And if constant crying of a baby next to your husband doesn't wake him up, I'd be really surprised. In any case, no harm trying this for one night.

+1

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can we talk more about the necklace? What does it look like? Did he always wear a necklace, or was this something he started after you said yes? Does he have chest hair? Is the necklace visible when he's dressed?

Ughhhhhhhh.

Ok.

It’s a gold chain necklace with a catholic saint pendant that’s a family heirloom on it. Something meant to resemble protection. He’s always worn it. No chest hair. No it’s not visible when he’s dressed, it’s tucked under his shirt. So when he sleeps it’s visible.

Eww

NP. How did the necklace get stuck on the pillow? Did he just flail and sleep with the necklace strapping him to the pillow? This necklace seems hazardous.

[Anonymous]

The person who is working should get solid sleep. Especially if they are driving to and from work or have a job where sleep deprivation could be a safety risk. The parent who is at home can manage the sleep deprivation. They don't have to go anywhere or do anything that involves precision or calculations or attention to detail or concentration.

Once both parents are back at work, it should be split since there is no good solution. The person who drives / needs concentration would still get the most sleep.

Many men / women wear necklaces or have a piece of jewelry that is important to them - not sure why people are up in arms about that.

[Anonymous]

Frankly, OP, I have to wonder why you didn't buy a new mattress years ago because it takes a long time for mattresses to sag! Mattress warehouse sells at a huge discount and will deliver and, I believe, for a small price will remove old mattress. Use you noggin!

[Anonymous]

Have you contested the denied short term disability claim? Was it a long term disability policy? LTD stands for long term disability, which pregnancy/birth is not, but 6 weeks maternity leave is very standard for a short term disability policy. 8 weeks for a c-section.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Frankly, OP, I have to wonder why you didn't buy a new mattress years ago because it takes a long time for mattresses to sag! Mattress warehouse sells at a huge discount and will deliver and, I believe, for a small price will remove old mattress. Use you noggin!

+1
There is always a mattress sale going on. And you never pay the "sale" price to boot. You always bargain them down (like when you buy a car). This is common knowledge.

[Anonymous]

A new mattress is cheaper than a divorce or a nervous breakdown.

At the very least, OP take the baby and go sleep on the couch.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Can we talk more about the necklace? What does it look like? Did he always wear a necklace, or was this something he started after you said yes? Does he have chest hair? Is the necklace visible when he's dressed?

Ughhhhhhhh.

Ok.

It’s a gold chain necklace with a catholic saint pendant that’s a family heirloom on it. Something meant to resemble protection. He’s always worn it. No chest hair. No it’s not visible when he’s dressed, it’s tucked under his shirt. So when he sleeps it’s visible.

Eww

NP. How did the necklace get stuck on the pillow? Did he just flail and sleep with the necklace strapping him to the pillow? This necklace seems hazardous.

I’m guessing the gold chain has a pendant (cross? Circle? Heart? Initials? Flava flave clock?) that got stuck in a pillow with lace. Or yarn. I find it hilarious that he was like eff it, gave up the struggle and went back to sleep. I suspect he has a hairy chest, that could have contributed to the brief tangled tango that succeed in keeping him down for the the count.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Op here.

DH would never sell the necklace.

We are living off our savings because I am on maternity leave. We will most likely buy a new bed once I go back to work in a few months. Sorry DCUM but we don’t have an extra $500 lying around for a new mattress. Especially since the policy I paid into for over a year denied my LTD claim. We were counting on an extra $2000-3000 and were planning on using the money but now money is more tight than ever.

DH is sleeping in the room for now and it’s still miserable. I woke up to him literally on my pillow breathing into my face.

I’m trying to frame it as a positive for him to sleep on the couch but he says it makes him feel lonely and cut off.

Aaargh.

You should sleep on the couch, because you are the one having issues. He is supporting you, and needs his sleep to get through his day. Do you never nap when the baby naps? You should.

[Anonymous]

The necklace sounds dangerous. I’d get a life insurance policy with a high enough value to get you a new mattress, and hope for the best.