Who typically pays for occasional sitter when family visiting?

Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:So people really go visit family and utilize 15-20 hours of outside babysitting? Like you all think this is totally normal?
No. Totally bizarre. 4 non-kid events in 1 week? Very weird with a 2 month old. I actually couldn’t have done it nursing, because I couldn’t have pumped enough to go out that much... It’s not as simple as “you’ll have twice as much milk when you come back” as one PP claims.
Anonymous
I think you should let your sister pay $10 per hour for her baby. You pay $5 for your baby. That way your total cost per child will be $22 + 5 = $27 and that still is less than $10 per child for you.

Your sister has the right idea as per baby sitting cost is concerned.


Anonymous
7 hours a day?
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So people really go visit family and utilize 15-20 hours of outside babysitting? Like you all think this is totally normal?
No. Totally bizarre. 4 non-kid events in 1 week? Very weird with a 2 month old. I actually couldn’t have done it nursing, because I couldn’t have pumped enough to go out that much... It’s not as simple as “you’ll have twice as much milk when you come back” as one PP claims.


OP here. Never said 4. We're going to 3 non-kid events; dinner for two evenings for probably 4-5 hours, where our kids would be sleeping anyway for a majority of the time if we were home, and a daytime activity for maybe 4-6 hours. Beyond that, as I previously already stated, we told them baby is perfectly fine coming and wouldn't be a bother but both sil and bil want to go out without baby.

We have already decided to cover the cost of both sitters as a pp made a good point that I hadn't realized earlier but is obvious, about cost equaling close to $40/hour, which would come out to $10/per child, which they have one, so not going to quibble over it.
Anonymous
My sister and I always just split the cost of sitters when we go out and leave the kids. It’s never been questioned. We get 2 sitters for 4 kids. Our sitters in dc are more expensive then when we go to their house but it all evens out.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:So people really go visit family and utilize 15-20 hours of outside babysitting? Like you all think this is totally normal?
No. Totally bizarre. 4 non-kid events in 1 week? Very weird with a 2 month old. I actually couldn’t have done it nursing, because I couldn’t have pumped enough to go out that much... It’s not as simple as “you’ll have twice as much milk when you come back” as one PP claims.


OP here. Never said 4. We're going to 3 non-kid events; dinner for two evenings for probably 4-5 hours, where our kids would be sleeping anyway for a majority of the time if we were home, and a daytime activity for maybe 4-6 hours. Beyond that, as I previously already stated, we told them baby is perfectly fine coming and wouldn't be a bother but both sil and bil want to go out without baby.

We have already decided to cover the cost of both sitters as a pp made a good point that I hadn't realized earlier but is obvious, about cost equaling close to $40/hour, which would come out to $10/per child, which they have one, so not going to quibble over it.


This is nice of you to do OP, but all the PPs saying it was unfair of you the othe way we’re wrong. If your sitter was fine watching all 4 kids, but THEY wanted an additional sitter for their infant, then they should pay for that additional sitter. I guarantee you when you go visit them in the future and need a sitter, they’re going t insist you pay “because you hVe three kids.”
Anonymous
Of course you should pay! You have 3 kids and they have one AND you're hosting them.

If your SIL offered to pay, you should graciously decline.

How is this a question???

People no longer have manners, I'm convinced.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:When I mentioned to sil and bil that the rate would be $15/hour and I foresee us needing 15-20 hours of coverage for the 3 dates we'll be going out, they first seemed surprised that we were expecting them to pay, then asked if the sister would accept a lower rate. I refuse to ask the sister that, as the rate is the rate and if she wasn't helping us, she could be covering for another family at her regular hourly rate. This is all through our regular group text btw.

I understand that they're new parents, so this is uncharted territory for them, but am a little annoyed. Should I just suck it up and pay for the difference- they're saying $10/hour would be more reasonable. Yes, from a lower COL area.

In the DMV $10/hour is reasonable for a young teen starting out babysitting. The going rate jumps to $15 pretty quickly and for infants it's often $20. Their issue is sticker shock. They don't realize $15/hour is a good deal.


Main babysitter needs an assistant not a 2nd babysitter. You would think someone experienced could handle 4 kids. The entire thing sounds strange.


OP said that their babysitter was willing to take on a fourth child for a total of $28/hour, but the new parents wanted a dedicated sitter for their special snowflake. So they can pay for the extra sitter.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Of course you should pay! You have 3 kids and they have one AND you're hosting them.

If your SIL offered to pay, you should graciously decline.

How is this a question???

People no longer have manners, I'm convinced.


Some of the posters on here have serious reading comprehension issues. If you're visiting and want an EXTRA babysitter for your own kid, you pay for it or at minimum offer to.

People no longer have manners, I'm convinced.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You are doing to leave a 5 month old and 2 month old just to go out with family. This is like an alternate universe to me. If I were visiting you with my 2 mo I’d tell you to pound sand.


What? I don't understand.

Are you saying you never go out without your 2 month old?

NP here. I would never leave a 2 month old except with DH.

that's you
Anonymous
I wouldn't leave my 2mo with a stranger to go out 3x in one week.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:I wouldn't leave my 2mo with a stranger to go out 3x in one week.


Most wouldn’t except the few crazies on this thread.
Anonymous
You expect your relatives to pay for YOUR babysitter? How would you feel if your SIL said, "Your part of the bill will be $92.50." I bet you wouldn't like it, OP.

Your kid, your bill.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Of course you should pay! You have 3 kids and they have one AND you're hosting them.

If your SIL offered to pay, you should graciously decline.

How is this a question???

People no longer have manners, I'm convinced.


+1. My God, yes.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:You are doing to leave a 5 month old and 2 month old just to go out with family. This is like an alternate universe to me. If I were visiting you with my 2 mo I’d tell you to pound sand.


What? I don't understand.

Are you saying you never go out without your 2 month old?

NP here. I would never leave a 2 month old except with DH.

that's you

Me and most people.
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