SR and Visi Admissions

[Anonymous]

My DD was accepted to both SR and Visi and attends a public middle school right now. No legacy, no hooks.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:https://www.visi.org/uploaded/Admission/2018-2019/2018_ADW_Teacher_Recommendation_Form.pdf

Seems like the parent questions are slightly toned down compared to a few years ago but they are still asking all of your child’s teachers and the school principal to evaluate you as a parent.

I think this form is an opportunity for the K-8 to warn schools about potential parent problems here. Real Pain in the but parents. You know the type, always complaining, their child is special, should be an exception to the rule, or rules are for other people not them, etc. Many of the ADW schools use this form, not just Visi. As long as parents are not a red Flag, I do not think it carries much weight.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.visi.org/uploaded/Admission/2018-2019/2018_ADW_Teacher_Recommendation_Form.pdf

Seems like the parent questions are slightly toned down compared to a few years ago but they are still asking all of your child’s teachers and the school principal to evaluate you as a parent.

I think this form is an opportunity for the K-8 to warn schools about potential parent problems here. Real Pain in the but parents. You know the type, always complaining, their child is special, should be an exception to the rule, or rules are for other people not them, etc. Many of the ADW schools use this form, not just Visi. As long as parents are not a red Flag, I do not think it carries much weight.

The most involved parent at our school with a 1000 volunteer hours, no kidding, DD did not get in.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is correct, overly involved moms are a hit in cookie-cutter schools!

The overly involved moms made parochial school miserable for our family (hint - they loved their child and the kids they thought should be their kids’ friends more than our kids. Much more. They were not kind to some kids) so we really preferred our Stone Ridge experience where the parents weren’t in charge of anything. It was a very nice, welcoming, socially relaxed experience for our family.

Seriously? I was afraid we would have to deal with them for four more years at Visitation. SR, here we go!

It was a good choice for us - everyone was just so nice. I met no mean/unkind parents in 6 years of social/sports/school events there. Maybe they’re there but they weren’t in charge of anything (there are a few parent run events like auctions but everyone is super nice) and we had very good experiences there.
Just a wonderful experience for our family.

I am so happy to hear about your wonderful experience at SR, but ours could not have been more polar opposite from yours. It was not a wonderful experience for our family. Clearly YMMV. There is no "one size fits all" school.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.visi.org/uploaded/Admission/2018-2019/2018_ADW_Teacher_Recommendation_Form.pdf

Seems like the parent questions are slightly toned down compared to a few years ago but they are still asking all of your child’s teachers and the school principal to evaluate you as a parent.

I think this form is an opportunity for the K-8 to warn schools about potential parent problems here. Real Pain in the but parents. You know the type, always complaining, their child is special, should be an exception to the rule, or rules are for other people not them, etc. Many of the ADW schools use this form, not just Visi. As long as parents are not a red Flag, I do not think it carries much weight.

Our k-8 parochial literally gave preference to many parents who were just like that - make an exception for my kid because we’re so and so. They had favorite families and their kids were given preference on many things. Some families left so that their kids could get a fair shake elsewhere. And it’s a reason some of us love standardized tests - because no preference is given.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is correct, overly involved moms are a hit in cookie-cutter schools!

The overly involved moms made parochial school miserable for our family (hint - they loved their child and the kids they thought should be their kids’ friends more than our kids. Much more. They were not kind to some kids) so we really preferred our Stone Ridge experience where the parents weren’t in charge of anything. It was a very nice, welcoming, socially relaxed experience for our family.

Seriously? I was afraid we would have to deal with them for four more years at Visitation. SR, here we go!

It was a good choice for us - everyone was just so nice. I met no mean/unkind parents in 6 years of social/sports/school events there. Maybe they’re there but they weren’t in charge of anything (there are a few parent run events like auctions but everyone is super nice) and we had very good experiences there.
Just a wonderful experience for our family.

I am so happy to hear about your wonderful experience at SR, but ours could not have been more polar opposite from yours. It was not a wonderful experience for our family. Clearly YMMV. There is no "one size fits all" school.

What grade?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:https://www.visi.org/uploaded/Admission/2018-2019/2018_ADW_Teacher_Recommendation_Form.pdf

Seems like the parent questions are slightly toned down compared to a few years ago but they are still asking all of your child’s teachers and the school principal to evaluate you as a parent.

I think this form is an opportunity for the K-8 to warn schools about potential parent problems here. Real Pain in the but parents. You know the type, always complaining, their child is special, should be an exception to the rule, or rules are for other people not them, etc. Many of the ADW schools use this form, not just Visi. As long as parents are not a red Flag, I do not think it carries much weight.

Our k-8 parochial literally gave preference to many parents who were just like that - make an exception for my kid because we’re so and so. They had favorite families and their kids were given preference on many things. Some families left so that their kids could get a fair shake elsewhere. And it’s a reason some of us love standardized tests - because no preference is given.

+1000

[Anonymous]

But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

The most obvious reasons why this isn't fair are: 1) a student cannot control his or her parents' behavior, 2) a student cannot control whether both his or her parents work, thereby limiting those parents' available time to contribute to the school/parish by running the big events and other volunteer activities and 3) a student cannot control how much money his or her parents have at their disposal to donate to the school and/or parish.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:This is correct, overly involved moms are a hit in cookie-cutter schools!

The overly involved moms made parochial school miserable for our family (hint - they loved their child and the kids they thought should be their kids’ friends more than our kids. Much more. They were not kind to some kids) so we really preferred our Stone Ridge experience where the parents weren’t in charge of anything. It was a very nice, welcoming, socially relaxed experience for our family.

Seriously? I was afraid we would have to deal with them for four more years at Visitation. SR, here we go!

It was a good choice for us - everyone was just so nice. I met no mean/unkind parents in 6 years of social/sports/school events there. Maybe they’re there but they weren’t in charge of anything (there are a few parent run events like auctions but everyone is super nice) and we had very good experiences there.
Just a wonderful experience for our family.

I am so happy to hear about your wonderful experience at SR, but ours could not have been more polar opposite from yours. It was not a wonderful experience for our family. Clearly YMMV. There is no "one size fits all" school.

We also had a polar opposite experience from the first poster at SR. But we know so many families had great experiences. If things go well, they seem to go very well. But that doesn't always happen and some schools are more equipped to deal with issues. For our son and his private school experience, we went in a bit more eyes wide open that there is no one size fits all school and to set expectations, very optimistic but realistic.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

The most obvious reasons why this isn't fair are: 1) a student cannot control his or her parents' behavior, 2) a student cannot control whether both his or her parents work, thereby limiting those parents' available time to contribute to the school/parish by running the big events and other volunteer activities and 3) a student cannot control how much money his or her parents have at their disposal to donate to the school and/or parish.

I personally had two people with special needs to care for at home, but hey I’m an inferior parent because I’m not volunteering at lunch bunch enough.
And those lists and questions seem absurd for economically disadvantaged families - totally absurd.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

Omg, there’s so much wrong with this I can’t even start. This is totally how K-8 Catholic is though for those of you who haven’t experienced it.
There were actually teachers who would bump up test scores for kids from ‘preferred families’ to get those kids into the right high school.
I’ll tell you OP that this doesn’t nothing for your kid in the long term as the prime of their achievement in life is 8th -12th grade. You can’t follow them to college and curry favor for them and thus the endless slide into mediocrity begins. And then your angry kid and their new spouse and kids begins the process at their alma mater to begin the cycle anew.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

This rat race to be the ‘popular ‘ ‘chosen family’ also causes intense meanness and bullying to be directed to some kids and families. It’s awful and not what you would think a Catholic school should be like. They aren’t all like this but too many of them are like this.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

Omg, there’s so much wrong with this I can’t even start. This is totally how K-8 Catholic is though for those of you who haven’t experienced it.
There were actually teachers who would bump up test scores for kids from ‘preferred families’ to get those kids into the right high school.
I’ll tell you OP that this doesn’t nothing for your kid in the long term as the prime of their achievement in life is 8th -12th grade. You can’t follow them to college and curry favor for them and thus the endless slide into mediocrity begins. And then your angry kid and their new spouse and kids begins the process at their alma mater to begin the cycle anew.

This is not how it is in our Catholic K-8. Not in the slightest.

Did you ever stop and think that you do not know the whole story, and those kids are working hard for the better grades....?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:But why is that wrong? If there are families that are "favorites" at that K-8 level, it seems very likely that they would also be "favorites" at the high school level. Why wouldn't a high school want kids from those families?

If you ran a high school, wouldn't you be more likely to admit kids from families what were beloved in the parochial schools and parishes? I would.

It obviously shouldn't be the determining factor in every case, but I don't see a problem with it being a thumb on the scale if two kids are otherwise equal academically.

Omg, there’s so much wrong with this I can’t even start. This is totally how K-8 Catholic is though for those of you who haven’t experienced it.
There were actually teachers who would bump up test scores for kids from ‘preferred families’ to get those kids into the right high school.
I’ll tell you OP that this doesn’t nothing for your kid in the long term as the prime of their achievement in life is 8th -12th grade. You can’t follow them to college and curry favor for them and thus the endless slide into mediocrity begins. And then your angry kid and their new spouse and kids begins the process at their alma mater to begin the cycle anew.

This is not how it is in our Catholic K-8. Not in the slightest.

Did you ever stop and think that you do not know the whole story, and those kids are working hard for the better grades....?

You're lucky then if that's not what your catholic k-8 is like bc for a lot of schools that's how it is. And no those kids aren't working harder than other kids for better grades. They are usually the kids who do the basic minimum yet somehow magically they get good grades and get selected for choice parts throughout the school. It's really disheartening.