Help this minority achieve that WASPY clean polished look

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:I am an olive toned Pakistani thirtysomething woman. I am petite and thin but have wide hips.

I love the clean polished high end look of the waspy blonde white women.

How can I achieve a similar aesthetic with my skin tone and build?

White people don't own the preppy look or high end look so do you really just want to look like a polished blonde white woman?

Enough with the idiocy troll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Brooks brothers and max mara for classic clean look. I would skip the lily Pulitzer, Talbots and other suggestions.

Yes, I agree with this. That whole spiel about J.Jill and LL Bean being french. . . huh?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:What you are looking for is actually 'French Girl" style- google it.

I'm pakistani-born here, totally get what you are going for OP. I dress like that b/c i went to prep school and that is all i know and feel comfortable in. The pakistani fashion look right now is copied from middle eastern women- its not really authentic, my grandma only wore surma and lipstick, my mom is a natural beauty who never wore more than lipstick and eyeshadow/mascara. The super heavy middle eastern style make up plus the brand name closes are very common now for Pakistanis- very dubai return. The french manner is much more akin to classic Pakistani style and looks good on us with our darker complexions and hair.

You need to take care of your skin and practice a good "no make up" make up look with neutrals. Get a nice haircut and make sure your highlights aren't orange- if you want some go for a dark, shiny chocolate brown. Invest in good hair and skin care and a toned body. The clean look comes from being healthy and not 'sloppy' with extra jiggles. Oh and get a compression bra and boy shorts to eliminate panty lines.

clothes- I'd tell you to go to J. crew but be careful, their quality has fallen a lot, talbots/J. Jill have more generously cut clothing that will look good on our curvier shapes. My sister is a more bohemian dresser than me and she loves J.jill and Peruvian connection. Honestly- i think like 60% of my wardrobe is Everlane. I like LL Bean b/c its so cozy and comfy but the LL bean only looks good on 'skinny' days. I like to dress modestly- not be very sexy and so this works for me as my natural style but that isn't for everyone. I think what you are drawn to is that its more natural, so you should just do that. I get cashmere sweaters and jeans from Uniqlo. I actually love my heritage but it doesn't all have to be shiny- I wear plain leather, with no embellishment pakistani joothas (men's kussa) with my jeans and a white button up all the time. Add a nice watch and one other piece of jewelry plus a scarf and you have a perfect outfit. Cup of Jo's style section has some good inspiration if you are sick of the 'Dubai Return' look.

If you are looking to splurge- Cuyana has really nice classic stuff. Thats my husband's go to for gifts for me. Want les Essentials and Clare V have nice purses/shoes that are good quality without being over the top. Madewell has reasonable priced nice stuff as well. if you want to add some rock and roll edge - get some docs/converse and pair with cropped khakis/jeans and an oxford shirt. If its cold- throw on a peacoat/parka/leather jacket/ cashmere or merino sweater. really- look up french girl style and you have the perfect clean natural style you are looking for that is also reflective of your own personality.

I hope this was helpful!

Not OP but this is a great post!

I agree. But why the compression bra??

As a large chested woman who is straight up and down, I have gotten the message loud and clear that boobs are fat and fat is worthless
Big boobs are only OK on people in entertainment or whatever, the rest of us who have them "look sloppy".

this was discussed before - 10 pages worth.

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/398847.page

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Brooks brothers and max mara for classic clean look. I would skip the lily Pulitzer, Talbots and other suggestions.

Yes, I agree with this. That whole spiel about J.Jill and LL Bean being french. . . huh?

Don't forget the Peruvian Connection...and oxfords and khakis with chuck taylors being rock and roll.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Brooks brothers and max mara for classic clean look. I would skip the lily Pulitzer, Talbots and other suggestions.

Tod's and Ferragamos for shoes.

The Ann Taylor, Lily, Vinyard Vines, and others mentioned can look very clownish, character like.

[Anonymous]

Basically, dress really plain and do your makeup in a very natural way (Bobbie Brown) and get a plain straight hairstyle you can pull back and/ or straighten.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:Brooks brothers and max mara for classic clean look. I would skip the lily Pulitzer, Talbots and other suggestions.

Yes, I agree with this. That whole spiel about J.Jill and LL Bean being french. . . huh?

Talbots for sure. Talbots and maybe some vineyard vines.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are youtube videos on how to look high end without spending a lot. Basically shop out of the J. Crew and Ann Taylor Loft catalogs. Buy the brands they wear Shop the stores where they shop. Keep your hair trimmed and you make up minimal. Go for the classic/prep look.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to look like a WASPY blonde white woman?

You got self-hate issues.

No. I said, I like their polished high end clean look. I don't want to be white or blonde.i want to achieve that clean crisp look.

Who are “they”?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

I agree. But why the compression bra??

As a large chested woman who is straight up and down, I have gotten the message loud and clear that boobs are fat and fat is worthless
Big boobs are only OK on people in entertainment or whatever, the rest of us who have them "look sloppy".

this was discussed before - 10 pages worth.

http://www.dcurbanmom.com/jforum/posts/list/398847.page

This thread was fascinating (no snark, I mean it). Thanks for sharing.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:There are youtube videos on how to look high end without spending a lot. Basically shop out of the J. Crew and Ann Taylor Loft catalogs. Buy the brands they wear Shop the stores where they shop. Keep your hair trimmed and you make up minimal. Go for the classic/prep look.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to look like a WASPY blonde white woman?

You got self-hate issues.

No. I said, I like their polished high end clean look. I don't want to be white or blonde.i want to achieve that clean crisp look.

Loft is basically crappily made fast fashion.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:There are youtube videos on how to look high end without spending a lot. Basically shop out of the J. Crew and Ann Taylor Loft catalogs. Buy the brands they wear Shop the stores where they shop. Keep your hair trimmed and you make up minimal. Go for the classic/prep look.

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:You want to look like a WASPY blonde white woman?

You got self-hate issues.

No. I said, I like their polished high end clean look. I don't want to be white or blonde.i want to achieve that clean crisp look.

Loft is basically crappily made fast fashion.

It's "my first job" fashion for those in business-casual offices.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:What you are looking for is actually 'French Girl" style- google it.

I'm pakistani-born here, totally get what you are going for OP. I dress like that b/c i went to prep school and that is all i know and feel comfortable in. The pakistani fashion look right now is copied from middle eastern women- its not really authentic, my grandma only wore surma and lipstick, my mom is a natural beauty who never wore more than lipstick and eyeshadow/mascara. The super heavy middle eastern style make up plus the brand name closes are very common now for Pakistanis- very dubai return. The french manner is much more akin to classic Pakistani style and looks good on us with our darker complexions and hair.

You need to take care of your skin and practice a good "no make up" make up look with neutrals. Get a nice haircut and make sure your highlights aren't orange- if you want some go for a dark, shiny chocolate brown. Invest in good hair and skin care and a toned body. The clean look comes from being healthy and not 'sloppy' with extra jiggles. Oh and get a compression bra and boy shorts to eliminate panty lines.

clothes- I'd tell you to go to J. crew but be careful, their quality has fallen a lot, talbots/J. Jill have more generously cut clothing that will look good on our curvier shapes. My sister is a more bohemian dresser than me and she loves J.jill and Peruvian connection. Honestly- i think like 60% of my wardrobe is Everlane. I like LL Bean b/c its so cozy and comfy but the LL bean only looks good on 'skinny' days. I like to dress modestly- not be very sexy and so this works for me as my natural style but that isn't for everyone. I think what you are drawn to is that its more natural, so you should just do that. I get cashmere sweaters and jeans from Uniqlo. I actually love my heritage but it doesn't all have to be shiny- I wear plain leather, with no embellishment pakistani joothas (men's kussa) with my jeans and a white button up all the time. Add a nice watch and one other piece of jewelry plus a scarf and you have a perfect outfit. Cup of Jo's style section has some good inspiration if you are sick of the 'Dubai Return' look.

If you are looking to splurge- Cuyana has really nice classic stuff. Thats my husband's go to for gifts for me. Want les Essentials and Clare V have nice purses/shoes that are good quality without being over the top. Madewell has reasonable priced nice stuff as well. if you want to add some rock and roll edge - get some docs/converse and pair with cropped khakis/jeans and an oxford shirt. If its cold- throw on a peacoat/parka/leather jacket/ cashmere or merino sweater. really- look up french girl style and you have the perfect clean natural style you are looking for that is also reflective of your own personality.

I hope this was helpful!

Cuyana, Peruvian Connection, and J.Jill...you don't look French, you look like a 50 year old 8th grade teacher.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:

Anonymous wrote:If you were actually a Pakistani, you would be pretty polished and sophisticated before you came here. Perhaps you need to ask the sophisticated and elegant Pakistani women in this country what you have obviously failed to learn in Pakistan.

I am Indian BTW, and Pakistani women have the best sense of style and fashion in the subcontinent, so I am amazed at your query.

What drives this desire to insult strangers on the internet?

People with tremendous insecurity and an overwhelming need to feel superior do this. So often on DCUM people completely insult others and they literally have no idea about the person’s looks or background. But it makes them feel good to tear someone else down. It’s such an ugly trait. For instance I LOVE Lilly Pulitzer and get ripped apart when I mention it. My style literally affects no one. It does not affect anyone on this board one bit. It has not affected my ability to land an awesome DH, a great job, and to be very successful. Yet for some reason my personal style is so gravely offensive to some of the women on this board that I have been called names over it. It baffles me that it is so hard to be nice, live and let live, and simply not comment if you have nothing helpful to offer.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Pear shaped is hard to make look waspy!! Maybe go for a bit more of a 50s housewife look with a neat, belted A line dress and pumps?

The character Charlotte on Sex and the City has a pear shaped figure and is an iconic WASP. Google images of her for ideas.

[Anonymous]

Hello! I am Pakistani-American, early 30s. My parents are usually horrified by how little make up I wear to their dinner parties, and so are their friends. My mother's friends constantly tell me how much more attractive I would be with more make-up. I have searched long and hard for what works for me and have taken a ton of criticism for it from relatives/family friends as well. The look OP is going for doesn't merge well with Pakistani beauty ideals - it sucks but I live here and not in Islamabad so I don't care what my parents' friends' kids think (cause there are still PLENTY of Pakistani-American women who are cake faced -- i.e. my coworker wear an evening smoky eye to work)

What works for me:
Talbots for work, J Crew factory for play
good skin - i am religious about my skin care and even though it's not where I want it to be, i don't bother with more than a moisturizer (with spf). i exfoliate 2x a week, use an AHA peel 1x, and eat very healthy
I do bleach my peach fuzz (it's jet black :/), but this is more so that i can avoid foundation. my face is visibly hairy when i do not do this.
neatly brushed and filled brows (pick a natural tone, don't go all black like our friends - for most of us our brows are a true dark brown)
very very very thin eyeliner on top lid only or a quick swipe of dark brown eyeshadow - no need for drama here, but just enough for definition. buy the smallest liner you can to achieve this. most days I skip this.
curled lashes with 2 coats of mascara but only on the top lashes
i line my lips with a brown lip liner (this is key!!!) and then use whatever work appropriate shade I want. I stick to shades that are closer to my lip color (browns/rusts/maroons).
hair i keep shoulder length and straightened. goody spin pins are a godsend in the summer when my hair is unmanageable (then it's in a bun every day). i agree with PP who said to avoid orange highlights. I intend on keeping my grays for awhile, but when I do color I will go a brown instead of a jet black.
nails are trimmed and filed, always. i dont like manicures.
jewelry i keep to a minimum. watch, earrings, pendant necklace, wedding ring/band. maybe a bracelet. maybe.
shoes are either dressy flats or pumps - I buy comfortable brands and can easily walk half a mile in them if need be.



I feel beautiful with my routine and have been told I look polished and put together. I think at the end of the day, it is also about what feels the most natural to you. I don't like dealing with my unstraightened hair - it's wavy and difficult to make it look orderly - and the whole day I am touching it to fix it. People notice I'm annoyed with it.

Good luck!