How old will you and spouse be when empty nesters?

Anonymous
50 and 52. We will be working for at least 10 more years, so I don’t think that much will change.
Anonymous
Well, I thought 53 and 52! But then DC had a nervous breakdown and had to leave her away-from-home college to live at home and commute to a school that is close to home. She’s stable now and has never given us trouble, is a good student, etc. so it’s all good but I have no idea if she’ll stay with us through college or what. We would be delighted if she wanted to live on campus at this new school and would happily pay for a dorm/apartment even tho it’s only 25-30 minutes away but that’s up to her. For now she’s in a good place and if living at home is what it takes to keep her there, I’m fine with it.
Anonymous
67. In addition to our (now) 3 in college and 1 in high school, we had a surprise (!!!) a few years ago and he is 7 now. In 14 years he will be 21 and we will be 67. Some days we are still in shock about it all. Its funny but we go to some of his school events and some of the 30ish and 40ish parents appear so uptight and peevish that they look years older than we do. We don't feel old now and I hope we don't in 14 years either. We both plan on working until the days we die not because we need any money but because we feel it keeps us young.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Probably not going to happen for us, actually. DC has mental illness, so we are looking at a lifetime of care.

Just to give you all another perspective.


+1 Our older child has special needs and we have no idea what kind of future he will have, if he will be able to live independently, have a job, etc. It's all so hard to imagine when they are typical, mind-boggling when they aren't.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:Well, I thought 53 and 52! But then DC had a nervous breakdown and had to leave her away-from-home college to live at home and commute to a school that is close to home. She’s stable now and has never given us trouble, is a good student, etc. so it’s all good but I have no idea if she’ll stay with us through college or what. We would be delighted if she wanted to live on campus at this new school and would happily pay for a dorm/apartment even tho it’s only 25-30 minutes away but that’s up to her. For now she’s in a good place and if living at home is what it takes to keep her there, I’m fine with it.


This happened to my cousin who is in her early 30s now. She moved back home from across the country at 26 after, and was home until 30. She was autonomous and working though but took a while to get herself worked out so that she was living and not just functioning- basically sleeping when she wasn't at work (9-5 office job) meanwhile her 2 younger sisters had launched but honestly I think her parents were relieved to have her living in their basement apt. for her recovery. (She has 2 other comorbid conditions that she takes meds for and is doing great)
Anonymous
57 when the younger one is 22. We are taking that year totally off and living around the world (different month, different country) and going to be in the USA from thanksgiving to new year.

Then back to work probably for a while but not sure what DH will be doing- he hopes to sort of move to his 2nd career around 50. My job is kind of always needed, I fundraise, so I can go back in.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:this sound so depressing. I am not sure do you plan to kick them out when they graduate high school?


um, yes. That's what my in-laws did and produced 4 independent self reliant adults. Once in college, they could only come home for visits, or summers to work.
I will do something similar with my 4 kids. It fosters responsible thinking and choices when they don't have the perpetual safety net of mom and dad behind them
Anonymous
55 & 57 until we're done with HS. Then 4 more for college.
Anonymous
I will be 50 and DH will be 62. DH will probably work FT until kid is out of college and then do some consulting PT. I will keep working for the foreseeable future.
Anonymous
I will be 44, DH will be 50. DH will likely be retired at that point and doing select projects he wants to be involved in. I will still be working, but I love my career. Once we hit 50, we have plans to downsize our house and spend a majority amount of time traveling. We both did a lot of traveling before DS was born, but they were to the major cities/countries. Also travel with DS. But we plan to do some of the less popular destinations.
Anonymous
We will be 48/49 or 49/50 when all kids are in college, depending on whether last kid takes a gap year (I hope they do). I'm pretty sure we will work until our mid-60s, but looking forward to the flexibility to travel more and not on a school schedule.
Anonymous
Anonymous wrote:
Anonymous wrote:this sound so depressing. I am not sure do you plan to kick them out when they graduate high school?


um, yes. That's what my in-laws did and produced 4 independent self reliant adults. Once in college, they could only come home for visits, or summers to work.
I will do something similar with my 4 kids. It fosters responsible thinking and choices when they don't have the perpetual safety net of mom and dad behind them


Agree. Five kids. Four grown. They left for college at 17/18. Graduated. Got good jobs. They live independently. Like adults should.
Anonymous
I will be 59 and DH will be 61 when our youngest graduates from college. Neither of us have plans to retire before the age of 65 at least.
Anonymous
when DD leave the house for college DW 52 and me 45

Anonymous
We will be 57 and 59 when our youngest finishes high school. At that point, my husband will retire and we will move out of state. The kids are always welcome to come "home" but home will be in a different location. If youngest child goes to public college in state, then our plans may change.

Of course nothing ever works out like I plan, so who knows what will really happen?
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