I ended playdate abruptly - Guest topped my son in a sexual position - WWYD?

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:I come down on the side of calling CPS. It is not your job to investigate. In these kinds of situations where there isn't a lot of Hard Evidence most likely CPS will interiew the father and the boy separately or may just interview the father depending on the investigator.

A lot to think about in this thread.

I tend to agree with the folks who recommend calling CPS. No one knows for certain what is going on, but for the sake of the children involved, I think it's right to err on the side of their safety.

I think it's hard for some kids to tell others to "stop." I tell my son that if something doesn't feel right to him he doesn't need to continue to do it. He can tell everyone he had to go to the bathroom, or that he's hungry or even just try changing the subject. If he has to leave, he should do that. I encourage him to talk to me too; so we can come up alternatives. In an ideal world, kids would be able to find the perfect words, but I think for some shy kids, it's a lot of pressure and anything they can do to stay safe is OK.

[Anonymous]

Just want to chime in because OP talked about "bad touch" and a lot of people are saying they tell their kid to notice if something doesn't feel right. However, I read something recently that stuck with me - instead of calling it a bad touch, call it a private touch. OP's son may have been confused partially because it probably didn't feel "bad." A touch to a private area can feel like a tickle or feel good. That can be confusing and make it so the kid "freezes" since they're not sure what this is. It's important to distinguish that for kids. A private touch is much more clear cut. I never thought of it before so I thought I'd share.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Well OP, at least YOUR son is ok. Never mind the boy you just kicked out of the house that may be a victim of abuse.

As someone who works in the criminal justice system, I will expect to see this boy in about 5 years. Thanks for your "help"

You are way out of line here. The OP did the right thing. If you think CPS is the answer you are sadly mistaken.

[Anonymous]

Horrifying OP. I'm sorry this happened to you and your son.

Good for you for following your instincts.

I would report to CPS.

[Anonymous]

Anonymous wrote:Horrifying OP. I'm sorry this happened to you and your son.

Good for you for following your instincts.

I would report to CPS.

You did the right thing. I'm super impressed.

Did you know you can call CPS and ask for advice? Describe the situation and see if they think it is a reportable offense. The burden to decide is off of you.

Good job listening to your gut.

What a tough day!